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Gil's a One-Armed Frisky Sex Symbol

Gil blogs. Just read it yourself. As expected, things get weirder.

1) "They call me the 'Golden Arm.' The 'Golden One Arm'."

No, they don't, but still. Lots to follow on the shooting competition with DeShawn.

2) "See, on the tape, they don't show you what he was doing....He didn't do it to the extent I was doing it, but he was doing it. They just cut that part out. They just wanted to see me goofy and do the goofy stuff."

This is blatant fabrication. DeShawn dribbled funnily a few times, which the famous YouTube clip does show. He was never in Gil's face. He was never pretending to throw a football while Gilbert pulled up. It's like comparing Andray Blatche to Kevin Garnett. Just not the same. In his heart, Gilbert knows this is a ridiculous claim.

3) "Because hey, I was surprised too to see him make 12 or 13 in a row at the end."

DeShawn started off on fire. Then he cooled down. He had one nice stretch in the middle, but I'm not sure what Gil's talking about here. Gil, get the scoresheet and take another look. After making 17 of his first 18, he then made 46 of his next 72. I don't remember any 12 or 13 in a row.

4) "This is the same guy [DeShawn] that says nobody can talk to him unless they're over 50 percent shooting. This is the same guy who put out a waiver release to talk to him, you had to sign a waiver release to talk to him. He has 300 waivers made so if anybody wanted to talk to him, they had to fill out the waiver first."

Wait, what? Huh? You need a waiver to speak with DeShawn? Who does? Gilbert? The media? Eddie Jordan? Nancy? Who? I've spoken with the man, and I've never filled out a waiver.

5) "So we have a big ol' swagfest going around. Just whoever has the most swag."

I've heard tales of this swagfest. It bears further investigation. Not kidding. Something about the guys coming up with ridiculous boasts in an effort to prove they have the most swag. A variation on the "you're momma's so ugly" game.

6) "It's the same thing with one-on-one. Yeah, I'm going to cheat my way to that victory if it's getting kind of ugly out there. I'll put in rules like if you foul me twice, that's a point."

Foul me once, shame on you. Foul me twice, um, foul me twice, um, that's a point.

7) Caron wasn't talking today about Gil's 50-point boast for this upcoming Portland game. There's obviously been a directive about no distractions, not talking about that, we're playing as a team, we just need a win, etc. But directives don't apply to Gil. He will be gunning on Sunday.

"Oh? That game's already coming up? I did not know that. Haha, of course I know that. Everyone knows it....My last one o'clock game was 51 against Utah. So I'm feeling pretty frisky."

8) "This is going to be the first time it's ever been done: a player blog from All-Star. I'm going to give the insight of what it is to be a player and a sex symbol at All-Star Weekend."

With a blimp. A sex symbol with a blimp or two. A one-armed frisky sex symbol with a blimp or two. And maybe instant coffee. Is the week almost over?

By Dan Steinberg  |  February 9, 2007; 3:09 PM ET
Categories:  Wizards  
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Next: Maryand vs. Virginia: The Wizards Respond

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