Life Imitates Kornheiser
If my e-mailers are to be believed, I'm now three for three in Cheese Boy references during the three-day history of the new Tony Kornheiser Show (8:30-10:30 am M-F, WTWP, support all the show's fine sponsors, etc. etc.). Aside from this morning's "Idol" recap, I haven't heard much of the show, because I'm attempting to blog during those hours. If anyone could tell me exactly what's been said, I'd appreciate it. But the overarching point seems to be that I'm attempting to steal his shtick. To which I'd say, yeah, duh. His shtick earned him lots of ESPN dollars, a writing job where he no longer has to write, the ability to crush bloggers like so many defenseless grapes, plus a brilliant radio show on which he's allowed to just make fun of John Feinstein and talk about the previous night's Idol episode, which is what I'd do this morning if I hadn't been hanging out with sports bloggers last night. (Note: Nigel from the TK show was also there last night, and will hopefully prevent me from becoming a crushed grape.)
Point being, Tony's got a pretty sweet gig, and yeah, I'm sort of self-consciously ripping him off to a certain extent (although I come by the baldness naturally, and I never asked to be put in his Page 2 space, since who really reads newspapers any more?). But yeah, the ripping-off thing comes from love and respect and admiration and imitation being the finest form of blah blah blah, and me pointing out this love/respect/admiration etc. in a public forum comes from a desire not to become a crushed grape. For the record, though, I also wanted to point out a few more ways in which I'm ripping him off.
1) Tony spent years going on about his good friend Nancy. This week, longtime Bog reader Nancy (whose name is actually Nancy, unlike Tony's friend) entered the Bog Hall of Fame by giving away, like, 439 Wizards tickets to Bog readers and posting 7,000 comments.
2) Tony speaks often of the "Littles," the peons who fetch him his bagels and put on his makeup and whatnot. The producer for my Comcast stuff is named Adam Littlefield, and he has, since Day One, posted on this Bog under the name "Littles." I mean, it's his name. We can't help that.
3) Tony has this thing called the "Mr. Tony Experience," where fancy people treat him very nicely when he goes about town. The other day at the Wizards game, a Wiz PR person gave me three leftover blue-and-bronze Wizards wigs, just because of the power of the Bog, and a random fan asked me who I was about 17 times and still didn't understand that I actually work for The Post. Ok, maybe that one doesn't work so well.
4) Tony has a whole line of Tony t-shirts, designed by a fan, the sales of which benefit charity. Go check 'em out. I've had several offers from Bog friends to design t-shirts; an Atlantic 11 D.C. Sports Bog Local Hoops Poll t-shirt is in the works, and I'd be very happy if someone (possibly even Tony's t-shirt person, Dan Levy from 609design) would design a more generic Bog t-shirt.
5) Tony used to earn famous reprimands from important ESPN people for doing things that the important ESPN people didn't like. He didn't really seem to care all that much. Yesterday, I got an e-mail from important Comcast producer Andy "Beanie" Siegel, informing me that the fine folks at Comcast would appreciate it if when I referred to their station in the future, I used the full-on "Comcast SportsNet" appellation, instead of just saying "Comcast," even though everyone calls it Comcast, and even though I call the Washington Post the "WaPo" and no one complains, and even though I call Gilbert Arenas "Gil" and no one complains, and even though the mid-word capital letter is a technique best-used by Arena League teams, and Comcast Comcast Comcast Comcast Comcast Comcast Comcast Comcast Comcast.
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