From the FedEx Lots, Part V
The weather was fine, the grills were hot, the shots were cold, the pink jerseys were, um, pink, and the diehards were abundantly optimistic. And so, I bring you Scenes From the Tailgate: Attempting to argue, in seven parts, that NFL fans are, in many cases, clinically insane. In a good way. Note: if you're included in any of these items, I'm not talking about you. And by the way, D.C. was ranked 12th among the 31 NFL cities for tailgating prowess in a survey released today. Baltimore was first.
Part V: The Hog
Meet 23-year-old Morgan Huntzinger from Ocean City. You pretty much couldn't walk five feet yesterday without seeing young Morgan strutting about in his full uniform, with helmet. I wondered whether he was hot.
"Hell yes," he said. "But you know what? It's worth it."
In case this photo doesn't do his outfit justice, it included receiver gloves, cleats, socks, pants, an official Randle El jersey, a helmet, eye black, a hog nose, and a cigar. All the items, of course, are authentic. No jock, though. Total price tag?
"Over a thousand," said Morgan, who had just been interviewed by The Two Michelles before I grabbed him. What's the meaning of all this, you wonder?
"We need to try to add more people, to bring The Hogs back," he said. "The Dirtbags, that name just never flew. We need to bring The Hogs back from when we were at RFK. Anyone who lived through that era, go to your closet, pull out the hog hats, hog noses, razorback helmets, hog t-shirts and wear 'em to games from now on. The Hogs are reborn. Bring 'em back."
Morgan, incidentally, is now referring to himself as "The Hog." He's gonna get a No. 68 official jersey with "The Hog" on the back at some point this season. Not just yet, though.
"When I come up with another $400 to buy an authentic jersey," he explained. "Until then, my girlfriend's birthday comes first."
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