Redskins Insulting Each Other
Remember, the theme of the day remains: relaxed. This means that I just left a near-empty locker room with about six NFL superstars shouting out their favorite lines from "Coming to America," and also singing. Good thing the NFL has those harsh videotaping rules.
The "relaxed" thing also means that the Redskins are frequently insulting each other. Like, for example, I was informed that Jason Fabini's nickname is "Fur-back-bini," or more often just "Fur-bini." Why?
"Looks like he just put some Super Glue on his back and wallowed around in the barber shop," Demetric Evans explained, pointing me toward Fabini's exposed back.
Or this, from Anthony Montgomery, about Mike Sellers.
"This dude thinks he's sexy," Montgomery said.
"I am, I'm fine as hell," Sellers said.
"280 pounds and he thinks he's sexy," Montgomery said.
"You're a Twinkie away from 340," Sellers said.
But the showstopper was obviously Clinton Portis, who has been insisting all week that Santana Moss's play has taken off since he was circumcised. He was at it again today, repeatedly.
"He had the big one. I told you, he tried to take a manly step at 29," Portis said, overstating Moss's age by one year. "After he took that step, his healing process, he's getting better. He's getting better every day."
Later, Portis said how he had learned so much more about his teammates this year, in turn allowing him to be a better teammate. I asked what he had learned.
"Santana to go that long without getting his tail clipped, that was the most interesting to me," Portis said.
I should point out that I'm assuming this is a massive joke, but I really have no idea. Anyhow, Moss quickly responded.
"Taking my name in vain, we might not be boys no more," Moss said, not looking particularly amused. "Don't ask me about that. I might go off on my boy."
"I know it's a tough procedure, man," Portis said.
"You listen to anything Clinton says, you might fall for anything in life," Moss said. "Listen to him, you ain't going nowhere."
And later: "That don't make no sense. I don't play that game. He can play any other way, but not that. It's all good though. If y'all see Clinton missing around here, you'll know I did it. We're gonna be fighting right here. Y'all gonna have a live one for whatever channel you want."
"I'm gonna knee him one time, y'all gonna watch him curl up," Portis said.
Oh, and remember how Portis was courtside last night as Team Wiz lost its fifth of seven. I asked if he had any thoughts.
"What do I think? I think they need to let me suit up, that's what I think," he said. "This jumper I'm working on? World class."
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