Standing Up For Skins Tix
If you've listened to (corporate-plug) ESPN980 today, you likely heard about the (corporate plug) Bank of America promotion at Union Station, featuring diehard fans of the (corporate plug) Washington Redskins standing up for 24 hours with their hands resting on a giant (corporate plug) Bank of America jersey for the right to win two season tickets to the (corporate plug) Washington Redskins. It's kind of like those dance marathons from the '30s, except there's with less Depression, more corporate sponsorship and lots of bottled water.
The basic rules: No sitting down, no taking your hand off the giant jersey from noon today until noon tomorrow. You get 10-minute breaks every five hours. You can make one 30-second phone call. Some (corporate plug) Bank of America employees might bring you occasional bagels and cookies.
One of the competitors brought pistachios. Another got a (corporate plug) Auntie Annie pretzel during his first break. A third thinks this might help her quit smoking. A fourth thinks his wife will bring food.
"No food," said the fifth competitor, 42-year old Brian Kimmer of Burke, the senior member of this quintet. "You've got to stay strong. If you eat food, you're gonna have to go to the bathroom. If you drink, you're gonna have to go to the bathroom."
"I think I'll eat cheese," said 27-year old Daniel Bowers of Rockvilile. "Get constipated."
Just before their first break, I asked how they felt. They all claimed they felt great.
"Does it make it a better story if we're tired?" asked 28-year old Eric Kempton of Millersville. "Because I'm miserable. My feet hurt."
"My feet hurt too, I'm not gonna lie," 26-year old Ryan Henry of the District said.
"Palms are sweaty, legs are a little achy," 25-year old Kristen Reamy of Alexandria said.
But whatever. There's still 19 hours to go, and things will probably get worse at, say, 4 a.m., when they run out of the "how many Redskins games have you been to" and "what's the best Redskins game you've seen" topics of conversation.
"Very quiet," Kimmer said, when I asked what they expected it would be like in the middle of the night.
"Smelly, because no one would have showered," Bowers said.
"Delirious," Henry said.
"I'm sure my feet will hurt even more," Kempton said.
"But I'm sure the city life will keep us awake," Reamy predicted.
"Watch out for the homeless people and the pigeons," Bowers recommended.
"I need you here to hate," Reamy shouted out to a Cowboys fan friend of hers. "I feed off the hate."
When I left, around 5:30, the supervisors and the nutcases were discussing exactly what they'd do for exactly how much money. Assuming these ticket packages are worth a couple thousand dollars, I guess it's worth standing up for 24 hours, except for this catch: If more than one of these nutcases last 24 hours, the season tickets will be awarded to the winner of a trivia contest.
Regardless, all five thoroughly plan on being here for the duration. So if you're in the Union Station neighborhood around dawn and you feel like looking at weird people standing up for 24 consecutive hours to win Redskins tickets, they'll be here.
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