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The List: Redskins Distractions

Lindsay Applebaum here, babysitting the Bog for a few hours while Agent Steinz is out. Only a slightly better idea than leaving your kids with K-Fed.

Redskins tight end Chris Cooley exposed his playbook (on purpose) and his [insert slang of choice for male anatomy here] (by accident) on his official blog on Sunday, adding to the rather long list of recent Redskins-related distractions from football.

Now, when I say "distractions," I use the term lightly -- not even one of the most important presidential elections in modern times (so they say) can distract this town from its football. But do a Google blog search for "Redskins" and you'll find that very few of the results have anything to do with the actual game of football (my personal favorite: "Redskins Tight End Drops the Ball").

(Also, I need to get this taken-out-of-context-but-ha!-it's-still-funny immaturity out of the way right now: "I think Chris used a little bit of poor discretion using that type of prop, if you will," Zorn said, "prop" meaning playbook, but--ha!--it sounds like he's talking about [something else]!!!)

A few other stories that have preoccupied the media as of late:

1) Running back Clinton Portis calls out the Redskins' offensive line, expresses his desire (?) to go back to Denver (?).

2) Clinton Portis and Brian Mitchell exchange somewhat vague verbal warfare over the radio, hug it out (sort of).

3) Rookie tight end Fred Davis (accidentally?) sleeps through minicamp practice, Redskins get thisclose to sending out an Amber Albert.

All this, and we're only two games in! With so much more of the season to go, what else could possibly happen? Maybe...

4) Portis and Mitchell actually throw down, in an HBO special entitled "I'll Step to You."

5) Portis invents a new character, angers some religious/activist group.

6) Third-string quarterback Colt Brennan breaks out his ukulele again (not a euphemism), embarrasses team, city.

7) Portis starts his own blog, Internet immediately implodes.

Those are just a few ideas, and yours are probably better, so why don't you just list them in the comments?

By Lindsay Applebaum  |  September 17, 2008; 12:53 PM ET
Categories:  Redskins  
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Next: Today's Top Five: Baby Mama Drama


I just can't for the life of me figure out how Crowd Noise went belly up.

Posted by: Anonymous | September 17, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

"We secretly replaced Steinz's high quality Bog posts with posts from the world's worst sports blogger*. Let's see if anyone will notice!"

* Not an exaggeration.

Posted by: Waste of space | September 17, 2008 2:12 PM | Report abuse

Ripping on a solidly written first post? Way to amp up on the trolling. We gotta get the Bog on that list.

Posted by: Nice, dude | September 17, 2008 2:27 PM | Report abuse

Lindsay Applebaum's pocket's tight, Anonymous. I'll step to you.

Posted by: Lindsay Applebaum | September 17, 2008 2:34 PM | Report abuse

Lindsay....I have tried forever to get your sister Bonita to put me on.....
Bonita Bonita Bonita.

Posted by: Keino | September 17, 2008 2:45 PM | Report abuse

8) Jim Zorn and Rip Torn swap places, lives, nobody notices.

Will the Tribe Called Quest references ever get old? This commenter says no.

Posted by: DCU_Rick | September 17, 2008 3:10 PM | Report abuse


The song has been recycling in my head ever since I made the post.....

Posted by: Keino | September 17, 2008 3:26 PM | Report abuse

How about that moron Derek Frost. Not really a distraction either, but fans - for some stupid reason - believe him.

ps. Waste of space, jealousy will get you nowhere*

*I'd rather read Bonita than you're stupidity any day.

Posted by: Rep. Heath Shuler (D-NC) | September 17, 2008 5:05 PM | Report abuse

Chris Cooley confirms my opinion of Washington Redskins. Most of them are a bunch of scumbuckets!

SUCH CLASS, MR. Cooley!!

Posted by: JoeB | September 17, 2008 6:05 PM | Report abuse

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