Touring Smoot's House, Part II
There are plenty of attractions in Fred Smoot's basement, which he refers to as "The Underworld." There's a karaoke machine and a slot machine, a pool table and a steam room, a well-apportioned bar and plenty of mirrors. And what else?
"I actually got a weight room down here, too," Smoot said as he showed us around The Underworld during our recent Smack Energy Bar tour.
Um, Fred Smoot, lifting weights?
"I didn't say I was lifting weights; I've got a weight room," he pointed out. "And as you see, the weights are new. They're still new, and they'll be new 10 years from now."
You've never seen a weight room so perfect, every free weight gleaming and slotted in its place, the shiny new Nautilus machine with nary a smudge. And hiding far in the back corner is a cardboard cutout of that legendary D.C. sports figure, Rocky Balboa.
"Rocky, man, the little guy they said wasn't gonna make it," Smoot said, pointing at two-dimensional boxer, lurking in the back. "He's just inspiration. Even though he's got Philadelphia ties, he's all right with me."
Back to the rest of the basement. The King Pulsar slot machine sits on one corner of the bar. "I don't get paid much, but at least I know I'm gonna win," Smoot noted. The karaoke machine is on the opposite side, although Smoot prefers to freestyle his own music when he's back in Mississippi. In front of the karaoke machine are the steam room, massage table and hot tub; "my Wellness Area," Smoot called it. And next to the Wellness Area is a large brown wall highlighted by a massive "FS" insignia, bracketed by two lights from which dangle "F" and "S" bling.
His interior decorator designed the logo. At Smoot's urging.
"That lets you know this is MY house," he said. "That's my signature right there. I think if you've got a house like this, you should most definitely put your signature on it."
The natural follow-up question, of course, was whether Smoot has affixed the same signature on his body, in the form of a tattoo. Wrong guy to ask.
"I'm probably the only football player in the NFL with no tattoos," Smoot said, which was news to me. "You know what, I've sat in the chair numerous times, I just never figured out what I wanted on my body for the rest of my life. I actually sat in the chair and told them come on with it, but didn't follow through."
What was he planning on getting?
"That's just it," he said. "I didn't know. I just knew I wanted a tattoo and I didn't do it, so I stayed regular."
Beyond the Wellness Area and Smoot's painted-on signature is the pool table and, soon enough, the two 1,000-gallon aquariums. As a child, Smoot's pets included several dogs and a turtle named Snappy Sam, but he'll soon welcome some sting-rays and sharks to his life. He's using the same aquarium dealer as Gilbert, although he said Gilbert's tank is about 10 times the size of his and Gilbert's sharks "probably could beat my sharks up." Why sharks and sting-rays?
"You shouldn't just get your salt water tank and put a couple seahorses in there," Smoot opined. "I think you should at least go all out and go on and put some real killers in there."
Our tour pretty much ended in the basement. We never saw the upstairs Man Room--no fiancees allowed--where Smoot watches game film, plays video games, keeps the television turned to sports at all hours of the day and leaves empty soda bottles on the floor.
"You know, the things I can't do in the rest of the house," he said. "You've got to understand, once you get a fiancée or a wife, you literally own nothing."
But don't get the wrong idea. Smoot's fiancee, a lawyer who was very kind to put up with our invasion of the house, sat on the couch for much of the afternoon. At one point, Smoot pointed the cameras in her direction.
"You know, all great houses come with a great fiancée and I have one over on the couch right there," he said.
All great houses come with a great fiancee?
"Well, not all great houses," he admitted. "There's still got to be a great man there to go find her."
(Part I of House Tour here, Christmas lights interlude here, don't forget to watch the video version on Comcast SportsyNet's Washington Post Live this Friday or on CSN's Redskins Kickoff show Sunday morning. And please see also Smoot's video blog and YouTube channel.)
Posted by: Toot Toot! We demand more Captain Smoot! | October 8, 2008 6:11 PM | Report abuse
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