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Concerning Brendan Haywood's Health

I'm working on a non-blog project today, so I'm gonna be scarce, but I wanted to post the best Brendan Haywood health-related interview of all time. A TV reporter yesterday spent a few minutes with Haywood discussing his wrist. It was, shall we say, enlightening. In the same way pouring 40 feet of mud-flecked chocolate pudding on top of your face would be enlightening. When all of you e-mail to ask for more specific injury updates, bear in mind this is what we're up against.

Just wanted to get a sense for how it felt out there.

It was cool. I'm not doing too much. I felt good.

Where are you in terms of recovery, give us a sense of that.

I don't really have a sense of that, man. Play it day-by-day, take my doctor's advice and get it reevaluated in a couple weeks, see what she says.

What's the doctor's advice right now, what are they telling you?

Go out there, do some non-contact stuff, get used to moving up and down the court a little bit, and see where it is in a couple weeks.

Are you on schedule?

I feel I'm on schedule.

In terms of pain, any kind of pain threshold right now, or what?

There's no pain, just a little bit stiff in certain movements, and that just comes with time, just with the injury it takes longer for ligaments to heal than bones.

What are they talking about in terms of a timeline for you, and what are you looking at?

Don't have a timeline. If I'm healthy, I'm back, but if I'm not, I'm not.

So there's been no timeline set for you in terms of a return to play?

They said this injury takes four to six months, so it depends on am I a four-month guy, a five-month guy or a six-month guy. I don't know yet.

Are you a four-month guy?

Not right now. It's been four months.

So you're a five-month guy?

Don't know. I'm not gonna give you anything on TV tonight. Come on. Stop with me.

I hear ya. Hey, if you had your druthers, when would you be ready to go?

When I'm healthy. You're gonna find a million and one ways to ask me the same question, huh?

A practice like today, a practice this physical, when do you think you might be ready for something like that?

Don't know. I hate to keep hitting you with the same thing, but I really don't know. I'll be reevaluated in a couple weeks. This might be a good interview for my doctor, she knows better than me. She's got the x-rays, the MRIs and everything. And she's a specialist in this area, so she knows way better than me.

Is she a good quote?

I don't know. She's a doctor, she's probably gonna be even more bland than me.

By the way, some fans have Haywood's gamer tag, and have been sending him messages about his health through those means.

"I'm just as bland there as I am here," promised Haywood, who was laughing through that mess above. "How's your wrist? Good. When you coming back? Don't know."

Haywood uses his tag to play Madden against an assortment of NBA guys, including Jared Dudley, Ryan Hollins, Juan Dixon and Nate Robinson.

"I had to give it to him a couple times," Haywood said of Robinson.

Also, if you didn't know, there's a standard "friendly" wager between NBA guys every time their college teams play. The Wizards, with an astounding six ACC guys, have been having a lot of "friendly" wagers lately. That leads to a lot of talking.

"Especially with [North Carolina's] loss to Maryland," Caron Butler said. "Juan was doing most of the talking, I was just doing a lot of co-signing."

"Juan was really excited, because I think that was their first big win in the last couple of years," Haywood said.

As for coaches, they have a standard "even friendlier" wager with players when their schools meet.

"Due to the recession," Butler explained. "The coaches don't live the extravagant lifestyles like the players."

By Dan Steinberg  |  February 25, 2009; 11:14 AM ET
Categories:  Media , Wizards  
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Next: Operation Scheyerface v2.0


So, which has been more pathetic: The Wizards, or the no-snow winter? Vote in our poll over at Capital Weather Gang.

Posted by: CapitalWeatherGang | February 25, 2009 11:41 AM | Report abuse

to quote the once great Keith Olbermann: "he's day-to-day. aren't we all."

i have to say that i'm siding with Haywood on this one - how annoying to keep being asked the same question that doesn't have a definitive answer. i would have eventually given up and just told the guy "you want a date? i'll be ready to play on January 28, 2011. mark it down."

Posted by: dimesmakedollars | February 25, 2009 1:39 PM | Report abuse

That interview, more or less, could have been summed up into two questions.

Just wanted to get a sense for how it felt out there?
It was cool. I’m not doing too much. I felt good.

Where are you in terms of recovery, give us a sense of that?
Paraphrasing: I have a contract that will pay me if I play or not for this season and next. I don’t have to worry about playing until next year so I can get a new contract. There is a 50% chance that I will play this year…Either I will or I won’t.

Posted by: _newt_ | February 25, 2009 1:53 PM | Report abuse

Olbermann channeling the still great Vin Scully.

I'm on Haywood's side on this too. He told the dude there was stiffness but no pain, and he'd see where he was in a couple of weeks. Everything else is just reiterating the same thing in different words. I'd get p-o'd too if someone kept asking the same damn question I'd already answered.

Posted by: burke2 | February 25, 2009 1:57 PM | Report abuse

newt:"Paraphrasing: I have a contract that will pay me if I play or not for this season and next. I don’t have to worry about playing until next year so I can get a new contract"

You must speak Basketball Player. That's a perfect translation.

Posted by: Samson151 | February 25, 2009 2:09 PM | Report abuse

"non-blog project"... is that allowed?

Posted by: NateinthePDX | February 25, 2009 2:50 PM | Report abuse

Dan I effin love BTH - one of the top quotes in sports, and rarely quoted, due to his average-ness. So please, more of this, when possible. Thanks!

Posted by: GshawnJohnson | February 25, 2009 3:11 PM | Report abuse

The project the WaPo had Stein working on was a tryout for Redskins Insider lead writer. However, it was discovered that Steinberg actually has pictures of his sources meaning they couldn't be anonymous and his consideration was withdrawn.

Posted by: fushezzi | February 25, 2009 6:45 PM | Report abuse

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