Jim Zorn Sells Great Tickets
A colleague excitedly told me that Jim Zorn had personally invited him to become a Redskins season ticket holder earlier this week. Turns out he's personally inviting a whole bunch of people, though not yet me, unfortunately. Even if he's not personally inviting you, though, you can watch this video in which he appears to personally invite you to
help pay Albert Haynesworth's salary join the team.
You really should go watch it yourself. Zorn clearly has a passion for sales. But in case you're jammed for time, here's the text.
"Hey, congratulations and welcome to the team! We look forward to seeing you at FedEx field for the 2009 football season!"
"Congratulations. Your patience has paid off. You've reached the top of the Redskins season ticket waiting list and you're now eligible for Washington Redskins season tickets. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Don't miss out."
Well, my friend signed up within the past decade. So this is definitely once-in-a-lifetime, if you plan on dying within 10 years.
"With 200,000 fans on the waitlist behind you, this chance might not be yours again for a long, long time."
Though you can always buy those "returns" every single week next year.
"Join the legions of fans who have had season tickets in their families for generations. Redskins tickets are very affordable. Prices start as low as $44 a game. Season parking is available as well. It's the best value around in sports entertainment."
Guess that sounds better than "It's the 28th best value around in NFL entertainment."
"Start your own Redskins game day tradition. Tailgate with family and friends and have great views of all the action each Redskins game day."
Unless you get a seat behind a column.
"If there's a game you can't attend, you can resell your tickets on StubHub at any price!"
Then you can sit back and read the national media mock your fan base for weeks on end!
"Join the team today! The wait is over! You can be part of Redskins Nation in person at FedEx Field. Pay only $100 deposit per season ticket and get your seat assignment in May 2009."
(From the site: You will have 14 days from the date you are notified of seat location in which to make payment. Failure to purchase season tickets once they are offered will result in forfeiture of deposit. Each new account requires a $100.00 per seat activation fee.)
"You can reserve up to eight season tickets. As a welcome gift, you'll receive a $25 Redskins retail store gift card. Seats are assigned in the order deposits are received, so don't delay! Here's Coach Jim Zorn with the playcall on how you can join the team:"
[Footage of him leading Hip Hip Hooray chant in locker room.]
"Now to get started with your account, just click on the button below, or just click on the video. Either one. Do it today. And Hip, Hip....no no no, Hail to the Redskins!"
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