As I walk through the valley of the shadow of Whole Foods

Coolio's new cookbook, by the numbers:

• Number of items in the "pimptry": 28


• Number of items a Kitchen Pimp has in his or her Weaponry, including a FryDaddy: 13


• Units of measurement used: a "peench," a dime bag, and a nickel bag.


• Number of recipes it will take you to become a "master kitchen pimp": 76


• How long it takes to make "Night-Night Chicken," a casserole for late night drunk munchies: an hour and 20 minutes, if you have everything already "cleaned and chopped in your fridge, like a respectable ghetto gourmet."


• Number of "Cool-Mandments": 10


• Number of chefs thou shalt have before Coolio: 0

"I may not be an iron chef, but I'm the only chef with platinum records," says Coolio. More here. And no, this isn't a joke.