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Posted at 9:00 AM ET, 03/ 4/2008

Rock and Roll McDonald's

By Fritz Hahn

Local rock club DC9 is apparently now serving food, something it hasn't done in the five years since it opened. The menu, according to the venue's Web site, includes "hamburgers named after local bands." This led to much speculation in our office about who these burgers are named after and what, for instance, a Nation of Ulysses burger might entail. We like bad puns as much as the next people -- possibly more -- so we decided to speculate on what the menu could look like. Add your own ideas in the comments section.

The Chuck Brown: The best burger that no one outside of D.C. has heard of.

This Is Not a Fugazi Burger: A tofu burger, served with a Coke. Never costs more than $5.

The Legwarmer: The Royale with loads and loads of cheese. Usually sold out.

The Bob Mould: A burger for the gym bunnies: 100 percent fat-free beef.

The Wale: The freshest burger in town, currently earning raves from all the critics.

The E.U.: Uses only the most succulent rump roast

The Mousetrap: Old reliable -- the same kind of burger you've eaten on Saturday nights for the last nine years.

The Virginia Coalition ("The VaCo Special"): No meat, just white bread.

The Soldiers of Jah Army: Topped with a kind blend of Jamaican herbs and spices.

The Eyeball Skeleton: One full-sized burger accompanied by two sliders.

The Edie Sedgwick: Made with Mad Cow beef.

By Fritz Hahn  | March 4, 2008; 9:00 AM ET
Categories:  Bars and Clubs  
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The BBQ and Not U

Posted by: Logan Circle | March 4, 2008 11:12 AM | Report abuse

The Boogiehawg: Previously one of the best burgers on the menu, but no longer available.

The Starland Vocal Band: Only one bite, but really good.

The Marvin Gaye: A classic burger that appeals to nearly everyone. Your server may take it away form you before the burger was able to realize its full potential.

The Pietasters: All beef burger with a touch jamaican spice and brassy notes.

Posted by: Tom | March 4, 2008 11:28 AM | Report abuse

The Stewart Copeland-Lean sirloin with lots of sauce. What sauce? try it and find out.

The Good Charlotte-Starts great, but the cheese and grease overwhelm halfway through

The Bad Brains- jerk-crusted chicken

Posted by: EricS | March 4, 2008 2:57 PM | Report abuse

The Trans Ham - A reinterpretation of other burgers on the menu.

Posted by: Adam | March 4, 2008 3:14 PM | Report abuse

How about serving Bo.a.r.'s Head deli meats?

Posted by: Matt | March 4, 2008 4:01 PM | Report abuse

Thievery Corporation Chili Cheese Fries

Posted by: VA | March 5, 2008 12:06 PM | Report abuse

the Henry Rollins: a pile of lean, bloody beef on a plate.

Posted by: Anonymous | March 6, 2008 12:30 PM | Report abuse

The Bad Brains Burger: BANNED IN D.C.

Posted by: jc | March 6, 2008 1:24 PM | Report abuse

The Free Lobster Buffett: The best lobster roll and side of fries this side of the Maine border.

Posted by: malonem2 | March 6, 2008 1:27 PM | Report abuse

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