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Posted at 5:00 AM ET, 10/14/2010

David and Sam get married

By Keith Berner

I’m thankful to live next to Washington in a year when Republicans didn't control Congress and its power to override D.C. laws. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to attend last weekend’s wedding of David and Sam – dear friends who have been a couple for 12-ish years, about the same as my wife and me. What a fabulous wedding, from the ceremony, to the ambiance, to the luscious food! The utter joy of the event was transcendent.

And that is what a wedding ought to be. But could not have been – for these two people – in most other places at most other times.

There has been so much pain just recently: bullying and suicides and beatings, not to mention outrageous political pronouncements. But justice for gays and lesbians will not be stopped. If nothing else, the rise of a gay-tolerant generation of young people will ensure that.

In the meantime, even for David and Sam the struggle for justice isn’t over. Sam is Korean. He’s been in the United States for years, under student and employment visas. But David can’t sponsor Sam’s permanent residency in this country, because the federal government doesn’t recognize their marriage. A lost job for Sam could cost this loving couple the right to live in the same country.

Sadly, the prospects for marriage equality aren’t so bright in Maryland. This state may look very blue in some ways, but political power resides with social conservatives such as Senate President Thomas V. Mike Miller Jr. (D-Calvert), as well as with the Roman Catholic Church. I’d wager it will take six years for Maryland to catch up to D.C. on this one. It would probably take longer still if Maryland didn’t have D.C.’s good (and demystifying) example right next door.

Keith Berner blogs at Left-Hand View. The Local Blog Network is a group of bloggers from around the D.C. region who have agreed to make regular contributions to All Opinions Are Local.

By Keith Berner  | October 14, 2010; 5:00 AM ET
Categories:  D.C., D.C. politics, HotTopic, Local blog network  
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Comments

Why should two men or two women get married. The origon of marrige is so that two people can have a family of natural ofspring with each others genes and raise their children. Gay men cannot even have sex without breaking the law. I think that sodomey is still illegal in most States, and at the least, is an unhealthy way to have sex and the same goes for women. Is this type of a marrige or relationship that we want our children to see? Kids at a young age are coppycats to what they live with or see others doing in their lives, not a very good example for our kids to see. Why do people confuse a good friendship with sex. There dosen't have to be sex in any relationship for it to be a good one and people are confusing love with the sex that they have in these relationships. Sodomey is not a natural or common thing in a relationship between Man and Woman relationship or any other one. I believe that if two people really care about each others, the sex is just a personal satisfaction and nothing more. In the gay community if a relationship does not include sex there will be no relationship or marrige between the two people because it is all based on the sex. In any type of love the sex is the last thing that should have any meaning in any freindship if needed at all. The people of this world are putting way to much meaning into the word sex and that should never happen. Some people are way to errotic and think that sex is what the world is all about. Just because two people love each others dosen't mean that sex has to be in their relationship or it isn't complete. If intercourse can not produce any children then it has no real meaning, it is just a selfish act between two people. If sex was non existant would we be attracted to each others in the same ways? No relationship should ever be based on the sex and if we really love another person we shouldnt even care about the sex, the love should be enough for anyone who really loves another person and sex is just a selfish thing that we think that we need to have any relationship. This world talks about sex like it is some kind of sport or challenge. Remember that sex does not make any relationship cpmplete, love does! Sex is for having children and does not define any relationship!

Posted by: randykree | October 14, 2010 6:36 AM | Report abuse

randykree asks, "Why should two men or two women get married?" They should get married because Marriage is a civil contract that protects more than 1100 rights of the partners in marriage - including hospital visitation, social security benefits, immigration, inheritance. If Sam and Dave have kids, it will protect their relationship with the kids. Of course some of these are federal rights and gays are still waiting, but that's what marriage will do once it is recognized. So there are at least 1100 good reasons to get married. Personally the one I like best is because they love each other. I hope that helps.

Posted by: caphilldcne | October 14, 2010 10:22 AM | Report abuse

WHY do people always equate and limit homosexuality to a sexual act? That kind of mindset is limited at best and at worst, extremely bigoted.

Posted by: linroy62 | October 14, 2010 11:02 AM | Report abuse

"Why should two men or two women get married. The origon of marrige is so that two people can have a family of natural ofspring with each others genes and raise their children."

Well, besides the civil contract and love aspects that caphilldcne wrote about here is another one:

The origin of marriage is not known, but we do know how past societies have dealt with it.
-- before it was "one man one woman", it was one man and how many wives he wanted/could support.
-- before it was "one man one woman", it was one man who works out a business deal with another man over the life of one woman (or more) - regardless of the opinion of the woman (or, really, pre-teen child)
-- before it was "one man one woman", it was one man of this religion to one woman of the same religion
-- before it was "one man one woman", it was one man one woman - of the same color/race ONLY (really, it was no non-white could marry a white)

So, as we see, humanity has been redefining marriage for awhile.

Posted by: Greent | October 14, 2010 12:38 PM | Report abuse

Good for Dave and Sam!! I hope they will be happy for many years.A strong and healthy society grants full rights to all of it's citizens.

Posted by: 10bestfan | October 14, 2010 1:17 PM | Report abuse

Randykree-- let's leave aside for the moment the ignorant, angry, bigoted nature of your comments (they've already been effectively addressed in others' responses) and instead let me ask you: why are YOU so focused on sex? You seem curiously--and a little scarily-- obsessed with these bizarre, prurient, misinformed assumptions about others' sex lives. Especially in light of how thoroughly you rail against its importance.

Posted by: photos1 | October 15, 2010 11:45 AM | Report abuse

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