Feast at Casa Bizarro

There’s no better day on the calendar than April Fool’s Day, to bring one’s alter ego out of the closet. Allow me to introduce Lennodo Mik, (a name straight out of the Bizarro World telephone book), who’s known around town as the hostess with the mostest Hostess fruit pies.

Lennodo Mik taking a break from the kitchen.

Lenny (that’s what friends call her) gave me a ring last night; she wanted to invite me and the Mister to a little get-together she’s hosting this weekend; I told her we’ll be out of town, but good ole Lenny insisted that I listen to the menu lineup so that I’d know what we’d be missing.

Thanks to a sale on mayonnaise at the store last week, Lenny says she stocked up on a few of those super-size 64-ounce jars, which she’d like to incorporate into all of my party favorites -- mayo-laden potato salad, devilled eggs and artichoke dip. “Shucks, I was thinking, with all that mayo, I could whip up a chocolate layer cake, too!”

Through a special connection, Lenny says she’s been able to rustle up a case of black-market cloned meat patties for the grill, and since she’s saved a bunch on the mayo, she’s not cutting corners when it comes to burger toppings. After all, what’s a cook-out without spray cheese!

Speaking of neon orange, Lenny will pay tribute to her favorite color (she had a part-time job one summer driving the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile), with a buffet of cheese-flavored corn snacks, including Cheetos, Cheez Doodles, Jax and Doritos. She’s even color coordinated the refreshments, with pitchers of Tang, in memory of her uncle, an astronaut who drank the stuff in space.

“You sure you can’t make it?” Lenny asked. “It’s gonna be a real hootenanny.”

“I can only imagine,” I replied. “Can I take a rain check when I get back from Earth?”

Who's the alter ego lurking in your kitchen cabinets? Show and tell in the comments area.

By Kim ODonnel |  April 1, 2009; 9:30 AM ET Kitchen Musings
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Shhh! Don't tell anyone, but my alter ego, Not-so-Sweetie, has a guilty pleasure. She loves Big Bite hotdogs from 7-11 covered in the fake chili and cheese that squirt out of the machine. A throwback to her college days. Maybe today is good day to have one for lunch...I mean Not-so Sweetie may have one. Of course, I have a refined palette and would never even think of eating such a thing.

Posted by: SweetieJ | April 1, 2009 10:49 AM

Off-Centre has been known to make a meal by splitting a package of Oreos and washing it down with Yuengling and milk (not mixed; think "main course" and "dessert"). All while sitting on the couch and watching DIY home-improvement shows with the Mr.

Posted by: CentreofNowhere | April 1, 2009 11:26 AM

Some days, only pizza rolls will give culinary satisfaction.

On a healthier note, does anyone have suggestions for using a lot of basil and lemon in the same recipe or meal? I've got a ton of both and I'm out of ideas.

Posted by: esleigh | April 1, 2009 12:46 PM

Latesun has been known to dip a Large french fries in an Oreo McFlurry like the McFlurry is ketchup once in awhile...I would NEVER do that.

Lemon plus basil in one dish...all I can think of is an improv pasta with a lemon butter sauce, finished with a little basil before serving.

If I had a ton of basil on-hand, I would add some walnuts, garlic, and olive oil and make pesto! It freezes great.

Posted by: earlysun | April 1, 2009 1:05 PM

lemons and basil: make a roasted lemon salsa, it's great on grilled fish and will keep for a while
Make some pesto with the basil and serve the roasted fish and lemon salsa with a side of orzo with pesto.

Posted by: meloniebeth | April 1, 2009 2:52 PM

B'More Dog Lover recently enjoyed pizza rolls for dinner. An entire box of Totino's pizza rolls is only 12 points on the WW Momentum Plan. Plus a couple more points for the light ranch dressing in which to dip them.

Lemon and basil...begs for a cocktail. Make a batch of simple syrup, steep the basil and sliced lemons in the syrup. Let cool. Mix one part vodka and one part syrup in a tall glass with ice, top with club soda/sparkling water and garnish with a slice of lemon and a sprig of basil. Even if the weather doesn't cooperate today, you can act like it's spring with a cocktail!

Posted by: BMore_Cat_Lover1 | April 1, 2009 4:49 PM

Thanks everyone for the suggestions - they sound delicious. I'll be trying them over the next couple of days.

Posted by: esleigh | April 1, 2009 7:26 PM

Greetings from Denver, where it's snowing! I love all the Bizarro stories -- keep'em coming!

Posted by: Kim ODonnel | April 1, 2009 8:09 PM

Acissej eats McD's chicken McNuggets (dipped in MAYO!!!). At home, its the Elvis favorite - grilled (in butter) peanutbutter an 'nana sandwich, Cilla. Thankyouverymuch.

Posted by: Jess65 | April 2, 2009 7:42 AM

I used my "bigger loaf" no-knead bread to make the most incredible grilled cheese: Two large slices no-knead bread, layer of cheddar, some sauerkraut that I squeezed to remove excess juice, half a kosher hot dog cut into little rounds, some more cheddar. Slow grill with olive oil, not butter, with weighted lid to press down. Wow.

Posted by: davemarks | April 2, 2009 8:34 AM

LorenMacK loves her Kraft Macaroni and Cheese...with ketchup and a side of peas. Sometimes she's been known to eat the whole box in one sitting. But that's only when there's no one around to judge. :-)

Posted by: LaurenMcK | April 2, 2009 9:52 AM

i knew KOD was in Denver, so when I read the title Casa Bizarro, I thought she had succumbed to the must-see-to-be-believed Casa Bonita. Bad food but sort of a fun place, nonetheless.

Posted by: khachiya1 | April 2, 2009 12:43 PM

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