Skating Beyond Exercise Fits and Starts

By Rebeldad Brian Reid

Thank goodness for the Washington Capitals and the genius who decided that the team needed to move to a new, gorgeous practice facility. The complex, perched atop a Ballston parking garage, has two of the smoothest sheets of ice around, a well-stocked pro shop and absolutely pristine locker rooms. Most important, it is a 10-minute drive from my home.

That has allowed me to join a league and strap on skates on a regular basis for the first time since I was 12. It also guarantees me at least one good hour of exercise a week, up from zero six months ago. And the fear of being the slowest skater on the ice has shamed me into running -- at least a little bit -- each week. I'm not at the 30 to 90 minutes a day that the exercise experts recommend, but at least it's something.

I'm hoping the hockey thing sticks. Right now, it's the best hour of my week, and the realities of scheduling ice time in the area means that I don't have to lace up until 10 p.m. or later most weeks, allowing me to stick around for bedtime before I get my ya-yas out.

But I have to acknowledge that my time as a parent has been marked by failed efforts to get in good habits. I've tried the up-before-the-kids strategy, to no avail. I've joined and unjoined the YMCA more times than I care to count, but writing a check every month wasn't sufficient motivation. I've listened intently to my wife, who has managed to get into a good gym habit. But nothing up to now has really stuck.

Looking over the comments from the last time we discussed this, I was actually struck by how limited the options were. There seemed to be only two camps of serious exercisers: the wake-up-at-5:15 a.m. group and the jogging stroller crowd, with a few of the bike commuters thrown in. (Sorry, weekend family bike rides don't count, and I'm suspicious about the claims made for vigorous housework.) Given how important exercise is for physical and mental health, I'm thinking there have got to be other strategies for getting into good habits. I would love to hear yours.

Alternatively, you can just sign up for the next season of hockey, which should start sometime near the end of the summer. Look for me out there. I'm the gawky guy with the weak slap shot.

Brian Reid writes about parenting and work-family balance. You can read his blog at rebeldad.com.

By Brian Reid |  June 20, 2007; 7:00 AM ET
Previous: The Breadwinner | Next: Single Purpose?


Add On Balance to Your Site
Keep up with the latest installments of On Balance with an easy-to-use widget. It's simple to add to your Web site, and it will update every time there's a new entry to On Balance.
Get This Widget >>


Comments

Please email us to report offensive comments.



zzzzzzzzz

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 6:59 AM

Biking with a kid on board works. So does a long walk with a stroller if that is all the time you can get. Try the capital crescent trail if you are looking for a fun place.

Posted by: HappyDad | June 20, 2007 7:33 AM

Wow the one day that I actually was was was up before the post and I'm not first. Darnit.

Anyway - I would love to be able to exercise more but, as brian said who has the time? The gym in my office bldg is practically free yet I would still feel guilty working out rather than being w the kids or working or running errands or ...

I have started to exercise a little bit-i.e. Stretching, lifting weights etc -forcing myself to do it 5 min a day-which sometimes ends up being more but it gets me moving and no feeling guilty.

We walk around the neighborhood all the time and I try to take stairs, etc, but it never seems to be enough. My dh wants to take another dance class (ballroom) again and hopefully we will soon.

And maybe I'll join the gym and take just two hrs a week and leave for work early, etc one day soon.

Posted by: atlmom | June 20, 2007 7:39 AM

People should definitely avoid a "one hour, once a week" schedule. If you're not in shape -- and that's most of us with sedentary jobs -- being a "weekend warrior" can kill you. I know; my father died that way, of a heart attack during his one hour of weekly exercise.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 7:50 AM

I'm the worst player on my tennis league and provide lots of amusement for spectators at the country club.

I do it for the regular exercise and fun.

Posted by: Love | June 20, 2007 7:53 AM

I always thought that, a a SAHM, I'd have more than enough time to exercise. And for a while, that was true -- when DD was 4 months old, I joined a class called Strollerfit, which combines cardio and strength training, and (best of all) incorporates the baby and the stroller into the class. I went faithfully for about a year, the longest I've ever stuck to anything exercise-related.

But now DD won't stay peacefully in the stroller for an hour while I work out anymore, and I find myself stuck. I do have plenty of time to work out, but I don't have child care. The gyms that offer it tend only to do so in the morning, when most kid-centered activities are scheduled, or in the evenings, when the dinner and bedtime routine predominate. I've been looking for a gym that offers early-afternoon childcare.

I've joined a dance class once a week, so at least there's a little movement. And I try to walk to the park, the pool, etc. if the weather isn't to harsh. But I haven't exercised regularly since January, and I really feel it.

Posted by: NewSAHM | June 20, 2007 7:58 AM

Don't think of exercise as something you 'have' to do. It quickly becomes a chore then and no one wants to do chores.

Instead, think of exercise as a reward for yourself, something you use to relax or just as 'me time' that gives you a chance to think without other distractions. If you treat exercise in that way it becomes easier to find ways to work it into your schedule.

I get up at 3:30 in the morning to do my 3 mile walk on work days, usually 3-4 times a week. On the weekends I get up a bit later but I still go walking at least one of the two weekend days. It takes me about 25-30 minutes and I always feel better when I'm done. I've been doing this now for 3 years and I've kept the 40 pounds I lost off by continuing this schedule.

One hour/week is a good way to a heart attack, by the way. It's not nearly enough time or repetition to 'train' your system into a higher metabolism level.

My single mom friend has been trying to exercise more, but her 1.5 yo daughter won't stay in a stroller, she's too big to carry when SMF runs and too slow to go with her. Now that her other 2 daughters are out of school for the summer she can get some time to run, but does anyone have any suggestions for when they're back in school again?

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 8:03 AM

"Thank goodness for the Washington Capitals"

I have never, ever, seen those words printed, or heard them spoken, or imagined them thought, anywhere before today.

And, I'm firmly in the pre-dawn camp (which includes early morning pick-up hockey on Fridays), so not much advice to offer.

Posted by: 1975 | June 20, 2007 8:05 AM

John L

"I get up at 3:30 in the morning to do my 3 mile walk on work days, usually 3-4 times a week"

That schedule would take me smack into the hookers' busiest hour and "last call" boozers weaving their way home in my neighborhood.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:07 AM

anon @ 8:07,

If 3:30 doesn't work for you, then find another time that does. I started going in the morning because after work I was already tired and in the summer it was hellishly hot. In my neighborhood that early there are deer wandering around, owls still on the hunt, and very, very few people up yet.

The only people I've seen are the infrequent police cruising by, two drunk yahoos in their truck once, one or two early risers heading to work, and once, a couple making out next to the pool. None of them bothered me (the couple were busy and didn't even notice me) but most of the time I don't see anyone at all.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 8:15 AM

"I get up at 3:30 in the morning to do my 3 mile walk on work days, usually 3-4 times a week. "

I knew as soon as I read this that it was a man posting. Another unfortunate reality is that I cannot get up and exercise outside the house in the early morning or late evening, because I am afraid of being attacked on the deserted streets.

Posted by: TJ | June 20, 2007 8:16 AM

"I get up at 3:30 in the morning to do my 3 mile walk on work days, usually 3-4 times a week. "

"I knew as soon as I read this that it was a man posting"

And/or a person who doesn't have a life!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:22 AM

I'm amazed by the 3:30 walker! That is discipline. 3:30! I admit it, I live in the middle of nowhere in a gated community, and I don't walk at 3:30 because I'm asleep. 4:30 is early to me, so is 5:30 and I admit it, even 6:30.
This is a good humility reminder for me.

Posted by: Liz | June 20, 2007 8:22 AM

"My single mom friend has been trying to exercise more, but her 1.5 yo daughter won't stay in a stroller, she's too big to carry when SMF runs and too slow to go with her. Now that her other 2 daughters are out of school for the summer she can get some time to run, but does anyone have any suggestions for when they're back in school again?"

How does having 2 other children at home give her more time to run? Are they teenagers?

My only suggestion is to strap the child in the stroller and go. I don't buy the "my child won't sit in a stroller" excuse. Who exactly is the parent here?


Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:29 AM

John L, what time do you go to bed?

I'll admit I've failed miserably at the "get up early" thing. DD is still up at least once a night, so sleep is way more precious to me than exercise at this point.

Posted by: NewSAHM | June 20, 2007 8:30 AM

atl mom you shouldn't feel guilty about exercising. Granted, I'm a SAHM so I can't speak to how others manage the time, but I go to our local YMCA who provides child care 3 times a week. The kids HATE the child care because it is crowded and noisy, but we're talking about 4.5 hours of their week (when not in school) - not a huge amount of time. I tell my kids that I am exercising so I can play with them, and so I can be healthy and strong and live a long long time to be with them. I think it sets a good example and I don't feel guilty because even though they don't yet get it, I'm pretty sure they would rather I live longer. Finally, I am more balanced and patient when I am exercising. My husband comes home, reads to the kids and gets them ready for bed and THEN goes to the gym. He's up until midnight and it takes away from couple time, but I'd rather he live longer too.

New SAHM, can you find another mom you can swap child care with? I know it's not the best, but when my kids were really little, another mother and I went to Curves which was only 30 mins and just watched each others kids. Just a suggestion to kind of keep things up until they are bigger. Also, have you considered biking. My daughter loves to hang in the trailer with books and juice.

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 8:33 AM

"John L, what time do you go to bed? "

He's probably a person with little or no life. And why is he so involved with his single mom friend's life (the women with 3 kids from at least 2 different fathers, a difficult ex-boyfriend, etc.)? Weird.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:37 AM

Well, if your community is dangerous for a woman to be out alone at night, it's probably not all that safe for a man to do so either. The women who do go walking through my neighborhood in the morning are usually doing so from 5:00 onward, and almost always with a buddy. Just to be on the safe side, I wouldn't recommend any woman to exercise at that time without a partner, though.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 8:38 AM

"He's probably a person with little or no life. And why is he so involved with his single mom friend's life (the women with 3 kids from at least 2 different fathers, a difficult ex-boyfriend, etc.)? Weird."

How is that warranted at 8:30 in the morning? Go back to bed and try getting up on the other side.

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 8:40 AM

"How is that warranted at 8:30 in the morning? Go back to bed and try getting up on the other side."

I've been up since 3:30 this morning!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:42 AM

You know, all you obnoxious anonymous posters can just bite me.

I don't know if there are more than one of you or just one incredibly negative and disruptive person doing all these posts, but every single day these unnamed, insulting and trollish comments come up no matter what the subject is about. You will no doubt keep throwing out the venomous comments, but I'm done responding to them any longer.

NewSAHM, I do go to bed fairly early, usually between 9:00 and 10:30. I find the walk in the morning helps to wake me up, and it's a good way to get the blood circulating in the winter when it's 28 degrees with a 20mph wind blowing!

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 8:45 AM

I run with my 11 yo. We do 5ks together, and now he is training to run a half marathon with me. We run before school, after, or in the evening. Sometimes around the neighborhood, sometimes on a path.

My good friend--who has 4 kids between 8 and 2.5, and whose husband is deployed for 2 years, effectively making her a single mom--takes spin classes 2x a week, does yoga with me 2x a week, and runs 3-4x a week. The YMCA by us has day care, or she finds a friend to watch her kids for the 45 minutes or so it takes to run a few miles.

My husband uses his lunch time at work to run 5 miles, or go to the on-site gym and lift weights. If work gets too busy, we will often go on a family run in evening.

Once I made staying healthy a priority, I found a way to do it. I made it a priority for my own health, and also because I needed to model healthy behaviors to my child.

If it isn't a priority, then all I find are excuses :)

Posted by: eve | June 20, 2007 8:46 AM

I'm in the 'get up before the kids' camp. I've set up my bicycle on a trainer that I can easily move from the laundry room (where it's out of the way) to the family room. I catch up back episodes of Desperate Housewives, Grey's Anatomy, etc. (Thank God for TiVo.) Yes, there are MANY mornings when I don't want to get up at 5:45 but I always feel better when I do. I take my daughter to the park that is farthest way on weekends so I get a 3-mile walk at least one day. Not much but better than nothing.

Posted by: my first post | June 20, 2007 8:46 AM

moxiemom - if your kids hate the childcare at the gym, and they're in school, why don't you go to the gym while they're at school? 4.5 hours a week is a lot of time to do something you hate - doesn't seem quite fair to them.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:50 AM

When the kids are old enough, you might find some exercise that you can do with them. I take my daughter and one or two of her friends inline skating once or twice a week and am going to work on taking them swimming. We also throw a Frisbee and kick a ball back and forth. Try putting an older baby in a backpack for a walk (with some toys attached to the backpack). If possible, sign up for a class of some kind...the structure minimizes putting it off until it's impossible. good luck.

Posted by: AngelaA | June 20, 2007 8:51 AM

"Well, if your community is dangerous for a woman to be out alone at night, it's probably not all that safe for a man to do so either. "

Bahahahaha! Spoken like a....man!!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:52 AM

Why doesn't anyone work out at night? I run or swim 4-5 times a week usually starting around 9 pm or whenever things around the house settle down ( I have a wife and 3 kids). I get done and am home at 10 or 10:30. Beats waking up early.

Posted by: wleffi | June 20, 2007 8:54 AM

"moxiemom - if your kids hate the childcare at the gym, and they're in school, why don't you go to the gym while they're at school? 4.5 hours a week is a lot of time to do something you hate - doesn't seem quite fair to them."

I guess I wasn't clear. When they are in school, I go to the gym during school hours. Now that it is summer, they go to the child care. Not a lot to ask of them when the rest of their time is playground, pool and popsicles. They also hate cleaning their rooms. I hate cleaning the toilets but sometimes we all do things we hate for the common good.

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 8:55 AM

NewSAHM... My gym - Sport and Health in Old Town - has child care from 9am-3pm daily. It's great!

Posted by: Elizabeth | June 20, 2007 8:55 AM

As I watch my weight skyrocket in my second pregnancy, this post is particularly timely! I try to walk for 40 minutes every day, pushing my nearly 2-year-old up the hills of Takoma Park (lots of snacks keep him occupied, for those of you who wonder. Time of day makes a difference, too. He's happy with it in the a.m., wouldn't last in the p.m.). But as it gets hotter and I get bigger, the walks are getting shorter. So I've been trying to figure out how to squeeze the exercise back in. One thing I have learned is that once you force yourself into SOME routine, it's easier to stick with it. It's just forcing that routine in the first place ...

And Brian is correct, vigorous housework isn't the same as a workout in the traditional sense, but in terms of the whole 30-minutes of activity requirement, I think it counts. It's just not likely to help sculpt those abs...

Posted by: writing mommy | June 20, 2007 8:56 AM

"can you find another mom you can swap child care with?"

I've been working on it. We have a Curves knock-off near my house, and I've suggested a child care swap to several of my friends. So far, no takers. But it is a great idea.

A new gym also just opened in my town, and it has child care that's available all day. As soon as we figure out what's going on with my body and our budget, I'm going to look into joining. But boy, is it expensive! $60 a month for one person!

Posted by: NewSAHM | June 20, 2007 8:57 AM

"Why doesn't anyone work out at night? I run or swim 4-5 times a week usually starting around 9 pm or whenever things around the house settle down ( I have a wife and 3 kids). I get done and am home at 10 or 10:30. Beats waking up early."

See above posts about it not being safe for women to be out running the streets at night.

Plus, exercise experts say that working out right before you go to sleep isn't good for you.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 8:57 AM

wleffi,

The reason I chose not to exercise at night was because by then I'm usually already tired, have eaten dinner, and in the summer even at night the temperatures can still be in the low 90's/high 80's. Obviously if you go to a gym the temperature isn't an issue, but the fatigue and meal schedules can still interfere, as can spending time with other members of the family.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 9:00 AM

I will be here early today!

Posted by: Mako | June 20, 2007 9:03 AM

John L., I love your posts and admire your dedication to exercise. Ignore the trolls.

I exercise an hour before I go to bed. We have an elliptical (sp?) machine at home, so I just do a half hour, take a shower, and go to bed. I also started taking the stairs at work, which is about 100 steps a day. If you have kids, you could use the machine after their bedtime or leave them with the other parent. (I know, I don't have kids, so I'll never understand... blah blah blah.)

When I was training for the TNT marathon, I often had to jog alone at night (during the winter). I carried my ID in case I was attacked so they could identify my body. How morbid, right? I also had to jog on a sidewalk on a 3-lane road (Key West in Rockville) because it was the only one nearby that had 10 miles of sidewalk, so I was also worried about being hit by a car. It was stupid and I'd never do it again. Having an exercise machine in the house has been wonderful.

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 9:03 AM

After gaining 65 lbs on my 5' body while being preggers with my monster baby, I am having a heck of a time getting back into shape. Before and while pregnant, until about the last two months when my doc told me to quit it, I worked out and modified it depending on my stages of pregnancy.

Now that I am 6 mos. past her birth, I still have 8-10 lbs to lose and can't get rid of it!!! To find out why, I have started keeping an exercise and eating diary and I think I have found the reason, too many calories and an overestimation of how much I am working out. So, I am cutting back on calories and kicking up working out-as much as possible.

When pregnant you eat more because you're hungry-ALL OF THE TIME. There was no choice but to get up at midnight and eat that food. My hubby called it "Midnight Muffin Madness." But after you've given birth it's tough telling your brain that you don't need that extra food.

As for exercise I have tried to adapt to my current lifestyle. I walk during lunch, after work with my kid, or on the weekends with my hubby, even if it's for 10 mins. During the hot summer months and cold winter ones, we aim for the Mall in the early hours. I also ride my stationary bike at night, for about 20 mins, at most, and longer on the weekends. And each night I do some type of resistant weigh-bearing exercise, arms, legs, whatever, and stretch-again for about 10 mins. All of these activities happen in the presence of my significant other and child, if she's awake.

So, it's doable but it's not the same as before her arrival. However, I have resigned myself to the fact that I will not fit back into some of my old clothes, or shoes. But at least I have gotten rid of most of the weight. Although, I would love it if my hips and shoulders/torso would move back to their pre-invasion width!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 9:04 AM

I have to agree, the new ice rink in Ballston is a huge blessing for me...right off the metro and skating is always my preferred form of exercise whenever possible...it makes it not so much of a chore.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:04 AM

I have to agree, the new ice rink in Ballston is a huge blessing for me...right off the metro and skating is always my preferred form of exercise whenever possible...it makes it not so much of a chore.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:04 AM

John L -- More power to you; that 3:30 AM is impressive dedication. I've tried 5:30 to fit in a quick run, but I just can't do without the sleep (even our normal 6 AM wakeup is barely enough to get me through to the weekend). Tried after work, but hated the time away from kids, since they go to bed @ 7:30-8. My New Year's resolution was 8 PM after the kids went to bed, but, ummm, errr, haven't really gotten butt outta the big comfy chair to do that yet.

The problem is, for me it really IS a chore. I don't enjoy it, and when I do it, it's only because I know I "should" -- and it's usually about the 87th "should" of the day. What I need is something like Brian's hockey league -- I used to love softball and volleyball leagues and play 3-4x/week (would even love a hockey league myself). But my schedule is unpredictable and I don't want to let my teammates down, so I tend not to sign up -- plus most of the leagues I've found are after-work leagues, which takes away time from my kids. I also love golf, but finding a babysitter for 7 AM Sunday morning is, well, impossible.

So for now, I take a Saturday class, try to fit in family walks and bike rides, throw/kick some balls around with the kids, and feel guilty about not getting upstairs to the treadmill. But I do think things will get better in a few more years -- my daughter is starting to want to run with me, so when the boy is old enough to bike or roller skate, we can do more cardio-type things. Even if it is just laps around the field at soccer practice.

Posted by: Laura | June 20, 2007 9:06 AM

wleffi -- working out at night sounds as awful to me as working out early in the morning sounds to you! Our routines sound pretty similar, just at opposite ends of the day.

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 9:08 AM

The thing with exercise of any kind is to do something fun that you enjoy. I've done martial arts for years because I find it to be fun. Finding the form of exercise that is right for you can take some time.

Posted by: David S | June 20, 2007 9:11 AM

We have a treadmill and still find it difficult to make time to do it. I have found the change in attitude recommended above helps. I purchased a TV series on DVD (one I didn't see when it was running) and spend 30 minutes 4 to 5 times a week on the treadmill walking and watching this show. It is my time to do and watch what I want. Yes it was splurge to buy the series but my health and motivation are worth it. I find the time by walking during bathtime, because that is daddy and ds (almost 3) time, or right after ds falls asleep. Most nights this is sometime between 7pm and 9pm. What I had to give up was time I spent sitting on the couch with DH watching TV.

Posted by: working on walking | June 20, 2007 9:13 AM

We have a treadmill and still find it difficult to make time to do it. I have found the change in attitude recommended above helps. I purchased a TV series on DVD (one I didn't see when it was running) and spend 30 minutes 4 to 5 times a week on the treadmill walking and watching this show. It is my time to do and watch what I want. Yes it was splurge to buy the series but my health and motivation are worth it. I find the time by walking during bathtime, because that is daddy and ds (almost 3) time, or right after ds falls asleep. Most nights this is sometime between 7pm and 9pm. What I had to give up was time I spent sitting on the couch with DH watching TV.

I have also thrown an extra pair of sneakers and socks in the trunk of the car so I can start to sneak walks in during lunch or other minutes when I need some stress relief at work.

Posted by: working on walking | June 20, 2007 9:14 AM

Also, my husband and I take walks around the neighborhood with our dogs. If you need motivation, maybe you should get a dog. They need 45 minutes of exercise a day and so do you! It also teaches resposibility to the kids and motivates them to stop the video games for about an hour during the evening (at least that's worked for my husband ;)

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 9:16 AM

Laura,

It sounds like exercising for the sake of exercising isn't for you. In order to stay focused on it, you'll need to find something that interests you but at the same time helps to burn off calories. Have you tried swimming or some kind of semi-organized class that isn't competitive? That way if you miss a session or two you won't feel like you're letting everyone else down.

Meesh,

I don't carry any ID with me when I walk; I probably should "just in case" but I don't. I'd recommend any woman exercising outdoors alone carry something for self defense, whether it was a whistle, pepper spray, or whatever. We've had various news reports lately about creeps in cars following women/teens out jogging along roads, both in the morning and evenings.

A partner is probably the best security though, and letting someone you trust know what your route is and when you'll be back.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 9:16 AM

"Plus, exercise experts say that working out right before you go to sleep isn't good for you."

First, I work with "experts" in another field and most of the time they are wrong with their generalizations. Second, listen to what your body tells you it can handle. For me, if I quit the aerobic about two hours before bed and do the stretches/lifting about 1/2 hour before bed, I have found I sleep better than the nights I don't work out. Excuses are excuses for not doing something. Just do it. (Darn it Nike.)

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 9:17 AM

John L -- yeah, I do do a class on Sat., which I enjoy; it's just hard to find one during the week that interests me and that doesn't interfere with after-work kid time and dinner time. I'm actually starting to wonder if I could find some sort of mother-daughter martial arts class, so we could be spending time together while learning something AND getting exercise! Of course, then I would have to face the humiliation of getting my butt whipped by a 6-yr-old. :-)

Posted by: Laura | June 20, 2007 9:22 AM

I have to actively schedule in my exercise, or I can find a million excuses to avoid it. Buying a treadmill was one of the best investments I ever made. Now I get up at 4(yes 4, since I have to be at work at 6) to walk and watch the BBC early news. I'm done in 30 minutes and have my English Acccent fix for the day, all while still in my pjs. After that, I schedule a walk during the work day -20 or 30 minutes to get out of the office. It makes all the difference.

Posted by: Sandy Eggo | June 20, 2007 9:23 AM

BTW, I nominate "Midnight Muffin Madness" for POTD. :-)

Posted by: Laura | June 20, 2007 9:23 AM

"Excuses are excuses for not doing something."

Or excuses for the state of something - like thinking that a "monster baby" has anything to do with gaining 65 pounds - twice the maximum recommended gain during pregnancy. Was monster baby really a 40 pounder?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:24 AM

John L

"I get up at 3:30 in the morning to do my 3 mile walk on work days, usually 3-4 times a week"

That schedule would take me smack into the hookers' busiest hour and "last call" boozers weaving their way home in my neighborhood.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 08:07 AM


Yes, I'd like to PROLONG my life with exercise- not cut it short through a rape or something.
This strategy is not advisable for women!

I too am thinking of proposing a semi-compressed work schedule stay 1 hour later 2 days, leave an hour early 2 days during the week to workout at the free gym at work.
But I could also used a compressed week to get the laundry done...it's a toss up!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:25 AM

best topic in a while!

I remember when the boys were younger, it was tough to work out. I was exhausted all the time, but to me, working out isn't a chore but a necessity to living. I grew from a tomboy up to athletics and competition. I love the high I get from doing some kind of athletic activity.

Now the boys are older and doing athletic competitions themselves. I look back to those baby years and think: a) it was so short and b) I would look much worse now if I hadn't kept up my athletic passions.

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 9:26 AM

oh yeah, I forgot to add: the key to adding exercise is a) like it and b) leave your kids with your spouse or whatever works for you. I was always comfortable (and maybe lucky). My husband wanted alone time with the kids too. Win win situation for us. We just worked out separately.

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 9:29 AM

I tried the static workout routine; weight training, stair climbers, etc. I got so bored with doing that I almost stopped exercising completely. For me that was truly "exercise just for its own sake", and I realized I had to do more than that.

I've found that walking through the neighborhood and seeing the different scenes is what keeps me motivated. I've met a doe and her fawn, seen an owl silently glide above the road, and said hello to the prowling cats and curious rabbits as I walk along the roads. The trick is to find what keeps your interest and allows you to burn those calories.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 9:30 AM

Meesh - I have a dog and his "need" for 45 minutes of exercise a day (? where did you get that cast-in-stone number?) isn't much incentive for me to do the same. Perhaps if you crate the poor thing all day he needs 45 minutes of exercise, but if he is let out regularly and played with by the kids during the day, he shouldn't need to be walked for 45 minutes every day.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:32 AM

I used to go to the YMCA at night. It worked because DH could get home to watch the children. I never went to bed early those nights but I wasn't getting up so early either.

It's just hard to get exercise in with small children. I figured that Moms with young children need their strength so a few extra pounds was fortification.

You can lose the weight in your 40s when your kids get older and you've got more free time.

Posted by: RoseG | June 20, 2007 9:34 AM

Meesh,
My dog needs to be walked a lot also. Retrievers! Love them to pieces but they need their exercise big time!

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 9:35 AM

If anyone wants to borrow my neurotic lab/bluetick hound at any hour of the day or night for an exercise partner, I would be all about that!!

Guranteed to be fierce when appropriate!!

Posted by: Robin L | June 20, 2007 9:35 AM

John L - ok, so the 3:30 thing works for you and you agree that women should exercise with a partner and carry mace. What if she can't find another friend to run with at 3:30 - or what if she doesn't wish to have to fight off an attacker with mace? What do you recommend then? Does your wife get up and exercise at 3:30 on the days you don't?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:35 AM

I work out at night also. My husband is in grad school so he is studying late, so I usually work out sometime between 8:30 and 10:30. I sleep great!

p.s. I have never in my life heard that working out right before you go to sleep is bad for you. That's laughable!

Posted by: CeeCee | June 20, 2007 9:36 AM

Well, there is certainly a camp here for "work out with your kids" if they are old enough. Last year, my ten year old needed to lose weight to play football. Rather than instill the horrible habits of his father for losing weight, we decided to work out together. After a while, I stopped, by my son rose each morning at 6:30 and ran himself. He has inspired me to start again. I see this as a habit he carries throughout his lifetime.

Posted by: former NoVa Mom | June 20, 2007 9:36 AM

I had just the opposite issue. I played hockey twice a week, one for pickup and the other on a team, along with other sports. Ballston is not the only place to do this and Reston would be a 20 minute drive for you, Brian. I preferred the late nights, even though I'm up at 5:30, and gyms generally don't stay open past 10:00.

Now, I have physical problems that prevent me from playing the game I love and I am finding it difficult to find other late-night avenues. I have considered underwater hockey, and I wouldn't feel all sweaty afterwards, but even that is not late enough.

Posted by: Working Dad | June 20, 2007 9:37 AM

OT to atlmom: today to Disney?

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 9:38 AM

You can lose the weight in your 40s when your kids get older and you've got more free time.

Posted by: RoseG | June 20, 2007 09:34 AM

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

Your metabolism changes once you hit 40, making it harder than ever to lose weight.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:39 AM

When I work out, I do it at lunch. I don't eat as much junk, and it keeps me from napping in the afternoon.

If there's no gym in the building in which I'm working, I just take a walk - a couple of miles during the middle of the day is safe in *almost* any neighborhood. Okay, when it's really, really hot I go to the YMCA, which means I'm gone about 90 minutes, but that's where flexible work schedules come in - so we're back to "work/life balance".

(When I was a Fed I had a boss who was an absolute stickler for the rule that lunch was 30 minutes, which made it tough to fit in lunch-time exercise. If I was away from my desk for more than 30 minutes, she wanted to make sure that my time card reflected "the hours I actually worked." This despite the fact that I was usually in the office 10 - 12 hours per day in those days. Made it fun to leave that job!)

Posted by: Army Brat | June 20, 2007 9:40 AM

"You can lose the weight in your 40s when your kids get older and you've got more free time."

Rose, You just keep on dreaming that little dream of yours. Trying to lose after 40 is MUCH harder.

Posted by: KLB SS MD | June 20, 2007 9:42 AM

Biking with a kid on board works.

Yup, till the bike falls over or you get hit by a car.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:43 AM

"I have never in my life heard that working out right before you go to sleep is bad for you. That's laughable!"

So you're laughing at the University of Maryland?

from http://www.umm.edu/sleep/sleep_hyg.html

Exercise regularly, but not right before bed. Regular exercise, particularly in the afternoon, can help deepen sleep. Strenuous exercise within the 2 hours before bedtime, however, can decrease your ability to fall asleep.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:43 AM

Looks like I missed Snippy Monday (the dentist was probably more pleasant). Hope all you dads had a nice Father's Day.

John L:
3:30!! A.M.!! I mean, 3:30!!! NOTHING says dedication like 3:30!! I sit in awe!!

Exercising can be tough when the kids are small, whether you work or not. I didn't do much for a couple of years, and I didn't like the feeling -- the big workout was generally chasing the boys around yard, the mall, or the neighborhood; I got to the gym maybe 2x/week, if I could get my mother to babysit.
When I was not working and the kids were in elementary school, I went to the gym every day right before I picked them up from school (20 min treadmill, 10 min abs, 20 min weights), plus I walked the dog every morning. I was in good shape, and I want to emphasize WAS.
As soon as I went back to work, I came home and worked out while the kids were out playing with their friends. I still do about 10-15 min on the elliptical walker (watching Oprah) then do crunches and some other ab stuff, and a light workout with weights.

My sister has a gym in her building, and she exercises during her lunch most days, and eats at her desk while she's doing work.

I'm just trying to stay one step ahead of that guy in the hooded robe these days...

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 9:45 AM

How much does Brian's hockey hobby cost? I bet a lot of families could never afford such a luxury.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:45 AM

Army Brat,

What do you do about the sweating from the lunchtime exercise? Some people don't have showers at their workplace and going home to shower/change clothes isn't an option either. If I walked 2-3 miles during lunch I'd be ostracized from the workplace in the afternoon due to the sweat soaking my clothes!

BTW,

I never said women should walk at 3:30 am. I said if they did walk early in the morning (whatever time works) having a partner is the best form of security. That and someone trustworthy knowing your route and expected time back.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 9:46 AM

This is an interesting topic to me - I really struggle with my weight now, despite eating pretty healthily and working out regularly through an early morning boot-camp style exercise program (in addition to walking to work and for most of my errands)....I dread the idea of putting on at least another 25-30 lbs during pregnancy and having even less free time and money to devote to burning it off (though I would definitely do it if was a good point in my life to have a child).

I wish all of you parents the best in trying to fit in some regular exercise, and I think that in future years you'll really find that the effort pays off for you, however and whenever you end up doing it. My grandmother was a regular walker all of her life (she never got her driver's license), and now in her late 80's, she is amazingly sprightly - in much, much better shape than most of her age group peers. She's been able to stay in her house and maintain a good quality of life during her latter years. Part of it is probably good genetics, but I think that the walking played a huge part too.....

Posted by: notyetamom | June 20, 2007 9:50 AM

wleffi and CeeCee, I work out at night too and sleep like a log. I think the 'night exercise = bad' idea is just a rumor or rationalization. The important thing is finding a time of day that feels comfortable, because there's no way I would stick to a workout schedule that required early mornings.

I walk to & from work, 4 miles a day. I take an evening boxing class once or twice a week, and on weekends I switch it up (hiking, biking, swimming, jogging etc).

All that is a bit beside the point, though. The main thing is, it works for me because (a) some of it is built into my regular schedule (the walking) and (b) the rest of it is stuff I love to do. I recommend trying a number of activities until you find something you really adore--it sucks when working out is just another chore on the to-do list.

Posted by: worker bee | June 20, 2007 9:51 AM

I recently signed up to run the Breast Cancer marathon next year in February. I'm a little scared since I've only ever run 5Ks. My husband and I discussed at length since I will need to do long runs (several hours) on the weekends to train, and he'll have to cover the kids.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!

Posted by: WorkingMomX | June 20, 2007 9:52 AM

Educmom,

Believe me, there are mornings when that 3:30 am wakeup is torture, even after 3 years of doing it. I've noticed that if it is raining heavily I'm more likely to go back to sleep; in the past I'd put on my raincoat and go out in it. This morning, for example, my wife worked very late and didn't get in until midnight, so I slept in and didn't go out this morning to get some extra sleep.

Two years ago I actually walked during a tropical storm; I was determined to set the habit of walking and nothing was going to stop me from going every single morning. The wind wasn't that bad, only about 30-35mph, but the rain blowing horizontally made it a bit uncomfortable when I was walking into the wind. Thunderstorms will send me back to the house by the shortest direction possible, though, or I just won't go out at all if one is already in progress.

The worst time was a winter morning where it was 18 degrees and a 30mph wind was blowing. Even with two pairs of pants, three shirts, a knit hat and gloves, and walking as fast as I could, I didn't ever really warm up the entire route. Usually even on cold days I've warmed up (i.e. can feel my fingers again) after the first mile. Not that day.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 9:54 AM

"You can lose the weight in your 40s when your kids get older and you've got more free time."

Yeah, and who's gonna want to have sex with me until I get in shape in my 40s?

Poor example to set for the kiddies.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 9:58 AM

notyetamom:
My mother's parents walked everywhere too. My grandfather really took to walking after he retired, and he walked about 10 miles a day (he only drove somewhere when it was very far and he couldn't walk -- like Florida -- or he was getting something that couldn't be carried). My grandmother never drove, and she walked to the pharmacy, the grocery store and the hairdresser's.

Grandpop only lived to be 80 (cancer) but he looked like a man 20 years younger until the bitter end. Grandmom made it to 89, and she was healthy until about age 85. My mother, who does NOT exercise (because she's naturally skinny and skinny people don't need exercise in her opinion), isn't as healthy as her mom was at 80.

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 10:00 AM

John L:
Still...doing something that difficult most mornings, even when you sometimes don't want to, is admirable. Most of us could not do that five times a year, let alone five times a week.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:05 AM

9:32, I guess every dog is different. My vet told me the round number of 45 minutes. My dogs aren't crated during the day and have a backyard to play in. Still, they need the controlled exercise of a walk (to reinforce that we're in control so they listen to us) and they need the fun exercise of the dog park to learn socialization.

The best thing about a well exercised dog is that they don't chew on furniture or otherwise mess up the house. We leave them alone in the house when we're at work and nothing is ever out of place.

And the dog needing exercise motivates us to give it to them because it makes them happy and keeps them healthy. There's no better motivation than making someone you care about happy! It may not motivate others who couldn't give a rat's a$$ whether or not their dogs are happy, so YMMV.

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 10:06 AM

oops...anon at 10:05 was me

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 10:06 AM

Huh, I realize that the last bit of my post could be considered offensive to you who I responded to. I did not mean that you don't care about your dog. it souonds like he or she gets plenty of exercise. I was strictly talking about bad pet owners. I'm sorry if I offended.

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 10:08 AM

"Why doesn't anyone work out at night?

DH and I both work full time. His job is physical and he has no desire to exercise with me. I'd rather be with him and the kids than exercising somewhere. With all the other things to do in our short time away from work, exercise is the thing that gets pushed to the side.

I already get up at 5:45 and would have to go to bed earlier to get up earlier, which I am not interested in doing because it would cut into family, kids, hubby time.

Full gym membership at work is full. Part time membership can only be used before and after work. I try to walk every day at work but find that I can't raise my heart rate enough without perspiring enough to ruin clothing. No locker room or private office, only restrooms available for changing.

I used to be very active, but to be honest, I would rather keep the weight I've gained than lose any more time from my family. Work interferes with my life way too much. sigh.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:13 AM

There's a third way - those of us with a cobbled together combination of late evening, post kid bedtime workouts, interspersed with lunchtime dashes to the gym 1-2 times a week. It's crazy, but because it's also flexible, it works.

Posted by: SEL | June 20, 2007 10:14 AM

I play Arlington County Flag Football. Contrary to popular belief, if you play for a decent team the game is very physical (similar to your hockey league). If you play for a good squad, there is pressure to keep yourself in decent shape so you can play well for the team.

Plenty of players bring their kids to the field, so there is kind of a "shared babysitting" thing going on on the sidelines with a parent is on the field.

The downside is the threat of injury and the soreness/stiffness two days later.

Posted by: Proud Papa | June 20, 2007 10:15 AM

My dog has developed a blood disorder and is extremely lethargic and the medication has caused weight gain. She can barely walk to the end of the driveway, much less through the neighborhood.

Posted by: to Meesh | June 20, 2007 10:16 AM

"Exercise regularly, but not right before bed. Regular exercise, particularly in the afternoon, can help deepen sleep. Strenuous exercise within the 2 hours before bedtime, however, can decrease your ability to fall asleep."

Yes, but any exercize is better than none regardless of when you do it. Sleap Apnea brought on by obesity will also reduce your ability to fall asleep.

I would choose to work out at night rather than not at all. But, nice try at an excuse for not working out.

Posted by: Me Again | June 20, 2007 10:17 AM

"I used to be very active, but to be honest, I would rather keep the weight I've gained than lose any more time from my family. Work interferes with my life way too much. sigh."

Nice...Not!!! how about the time you could lose from your family due to sickness or disease brought on by your excess weight?

Posted by: You | June 20, 2007 10:20 AM

WorkingMomX, for my training, I had to run 4-5 miles a day, ever-increasing mileage on Saturday (start at 4, go up in increments of 2 or 3 miles every week), with one day off.

For me, I had a 4-mile loop for the week. For the long run, it was easiest to plan the route by car (looking at the odometer for mileage) by looking for continuous sidewalks. I would find a route that I had to double back on. So if I had to run 10 miles, I got to five and then turned around. That way, I couldn't just decide to cut it short if I was tired because I had to get home. I figured that if I was just on a track, it would be so easy to skip the past few laps if I wanted to.

Try to stay in well-lit areas and don't listen to music so you can hear if someone's coming.

Lastly, ice your knees! I'm sure they'll tell you that in training, but it's so important. I didn't, and my knees ended up being damaged. I had to walk the marathon because my knees were still bad.

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 10:22 AM

"Sleap Apnea brought on by obesity will also reduce your ability to fall asleep."

People with sleap (sic) apnea don't have problems FALLING asleep. The problem is that they're not getting GOOD sleep because they're gasping for breath so they fall asleep at inconvenient times during the day.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:28 AM

"Nice...Not!!! how about the time you could lose from your family due to sickness or disease brought on by your excess weight?"

Not everyone who is carrying some excess weight is ill or has diseases.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:29 AM

WorkingMomX -- good for you and how exciting to commit to a Marathon. Okay, it's been a long time since I ran one, and that you are doing it post-kids is really impressive. I agree with Meesh about keeping up the regular weekday runs and then extending your long runs. I really had to mentally prepare myself for the long runs each Saturday. Also, I "rewarded" myself with a special long run on the Mt. Vernon trail when I did the 20 mile run -- a way to mix it up.

As for figuring mileage, the Post had an article a few weeks ago that recommended this site, which I love, it's sort of a Mapquest for runners:
http://www.walkjogrun.net

Also, it's HOT out there now. Summer training is going to be really hard, and you'll find that as soon as fall comes and the humidity is gone, you'll be running so much better.

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 10:31 AM

"How much does Brian's hockey hobby cost? I bet a lot of families could never afford such a luxury."

Equipment = about $300 (less if you get used), most of the cost is skates

Stick = $25

Random (tape, skate sharpening, bandaids) = $10/month

League = varies, but one I play in costs $300 for 22 games.

Pickup = varies, but one I go to is $10 a session

In general hockey is on the expensive side, but it's certainly not exclusive (and far more affordable than things like golf, or membership to certain swim clubs). Still love outdoor running as most affordable/efficient exercise there is (and practically free if you do it like my crazy Filipino neighbor and run barefoot)

Posted by: 1975 | June 20, 2007 10:32 AM

John L - sweating from a lunchtime workout can be an issue if you don't have the right facilities handy. I guess I'm lucky in that one set of restrooms in this building has showers, if needed. I also keep a change of clothes in one drawer of the filing cabinet in my office. (Since I'm almost always dressed casually - hey, I'm an engineer; it's the uniform - it doesn't matter that they're neatly folded.)

But on days when you're in a suit because of an afternoon meeting with an important customer, you just have to skip the lunchtime walk.

Posted by: Army Brat | June 20, 2007 10:32 AM

"I would choose to work out at night rather than not at all. But, nice try at an excuse for not working out."

I have worked out at night. It does rejuvenate me to the point that I can't fall asleep, and then have major trouble getting up in the morning. Since the kids have to go to school and I have to go to work, I found it to be way too disruptive. I really tried, but when the lateness to school and work became a problem, I had to stop.

Posted by: lurker | June 20, 2007 10:32 AM

To the anon poster, June 20, 2007 09:24 AM,
"Or excuses for the state of something - like thinking that a "monster baby" has anything to do with gaining 65 pounds - twice the maximum recommended gain during pregnancy. Was monster baby really a 40 pounder?"

I can't believe I am responding to the nerd who is sitting in the dark, eating ho hos, while scratching himself, but I have to do it.

Geek! I actually only gained 20 lbs, the other 45 lbs were baby, all of the related baby stuff, and a lot of fluid because I was almost pre-eclamptic due to high blood pressure b/c the kid was so big, 9 lbs+ at birth. In fact, in the first six weeks I dropped 45 lbs, and have dropped a little more than 10 lbs since then. AND, the average woman gains about 5 lbs post baby due to issues related to birth. So, before you shoot your anon little mouth off, know what you are talking about. Smooches and Happy Wednesday. Now, where did I put my twinkie...

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 10:32 AM

Nutty Mama,
I can't believe that you felt the need to respond to that...Are you that insecure?

Posted by: To Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 10:36 AM

I'm a big fan of yoga. If you haven't done it, it sounds easy (or at least not strenuous) but 90 minutes of twisting and bending and balancing is a great workout and will make you quite strong and fit over time. When I'm good about going, my body moves better and I'm more relaxed.

Even better, I can walk to my yoga classes.

Posted by: twisty | June 20, 2007 10:36 AM

Just came from Whole Foods for my lunch salad...saw a mother with three kids, one a little chubby (girl) and two (girl/boy) absolutely HUGE. The girl looked like a fireplug and the boy had a belly that would make Bubba proud. They couldn't have been more than 7 or 8 - how does this happen????? When I was that age, I was picked on for being a stick - of course, I was out racing around all the time.
Oddly enough, the mother was petite and slim....

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 10:37 AM

"Yeah, and who's gonna want to have sex with me until I get in shape in my 40s?"

Hopefully, your spouse who should love you for you and not for how you look. My DH knows that the c-section scars and extra pounds came from bearing his children.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:38 AM

"Still love outdoor running as most affordable/efficient exercise there is (and practically free if you do it like my crazy Filipino neighbor and run barefoot)"

Nope! Sex is the winner everytime!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:38 AM

WorkingmomX - my husband and I joined a local running group (there are chapters nationwide) to train for a marathon. We do three runs during the week of 40 or 50 minutes, time goes up as you progress but not beyond an hour, and a long run on Saturday. We've done one half-marathon, have another one planned for Labor Day and are planning a late October marathon. The program works great and the time it takes is reasonable. Our kids are supportive and excited as we accomplish our goals and the older two (13 and 11) will start running with us. We get up early now because it is too hot to run after work but we usually put the youngest (5) in the jogging stroller - the boys are out of town for a few weeks with family - and she dozes some more while we run. She doesn't mind the stroller at all but we do have a sitter for the long runs because I think it is too much to ask of a 5 year old to sit in the stroller for 2 hours or so. I found our group on the internet - first was "In Motion" and now it's "city name - fit." Local running stores have the information about these programs too. We plan to make running another of our family sports. The labor day run is at Disneyland where they also have a family 5K and a kids' run. We plan to take the kids when we run destination marathons too so they can see a new city and they want to cheer us on. I think it's fun to have all of us involved, and they seem to think so too.

Posted by: Stacey | June 20, 2007 10:38 AM

I love that he mentioned mental health as a reason to exercise. That is what keeps me running every day - I feel so good! I love runners high! The physical benefits are just icing on the cake. I exercise at night too but don't have any problem falling asleep - nice and deep. Would that be due to a runners crash? :)

Posted by: mountainS | June 20, 2007 10:39 AM

John L
"I never said women should walk at 3:30 am. I said if they did walk early in the morning (whatever time works) having a partner is the best form of security. That and someone trustworthy knowing your route and expected time back."

I'm not trying to attack you personally, but I am trying to make the point that men just don't have as many limits on their exercise or other free time as women do. AND, men don't have realize it. Telling someone when to expect me back is just a way to get them to the rape crisis center or my body in the morgue more quickly, not a safety device. It doesn't matter what neighborhood you live in. It's dangerous for women to be out alone in the middle of the night. I'm also assuming you would have a seriously hard time finding a buddy to run with at 3:30. My friends would laugh at me until they cried, if I even suggested getting up to walk before 6:30, and then getting to work on time becomes the issue. Also, it assumes you have a spouse hanging around to stay with the kids in the early a.m., which is often not the case. These are not excuses for not getting a workout. These are recognitions that women have a lot less freedom than men, due to violence against women and disproportionate responsibility for watching the kids.

Posted by: TJ | June 20, 2007 10:44 AM

MountainS - I agree! People who don't run don't believe me when I use the term "runners high".

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 10:44 AM

Don't rely on sex to help you lose weight; the entire act only uses about 150 calories; that's not even a decent sized dessert! Stretching out foreplay won't help you either; most of those calories get burned during the most...energetic...activity.

I suppose you could just increase the frequency, but since 30 minutes of walking/running burns around 400 calories, you'd need to have sex nearly three times a day just to equal that.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 10:47 AM

"I guess I'm lucky in that one set of restrooms in this building has showers, if needed. I also keep a change of clothes in one drawer of the filing cabinet in my office"

Folks, PLEASE do not change back into dirty undies after a shower!!!

Posted by: Balto | June 20, 2007 10:47 AM

Yes, mental health is another major reason I do it. I find that when stress related to whatever gets to me, a nice walk just clears my head. The calmness that follows a workout is just wonderful.

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 10:48 AM

By the way, I saw a few comments that seem to discourage cycling. I wanted to point out that the new/nice cycling kid trailers are less than 30 pounds and tow behind your bike on two wheels. Therefore if you fall over the kid(s) do(es) not.

Downside is that the brand name ones are expensive. The Burley models go for $450 new. However, I picked up a decent used one on eBay for a little over $100. I am excited to put the boy in the trailer and go for a ride...

Posted by: Proud Papa | June 20, 2007 10:50 AM

It's strange that all the people who work out at night talk about how great they sleep...

I take a warm shower after working out and fall right to sleep, tired and clean. It is the best feeling! I fall asleep so much
easier when I work out at night than when I don't.

I understand that my schedule will change through the years due to children and the like. But right now, working out at night works great.

Posted by: CeeCee | June 20, 2007 10:51 AM

"I suppose you could just increase the frequency, but since 30 minutes of walking/running burns around 400 calories, you'd need to have sex nearly three times a day just to equal that. "

Sex 3x a day sounds about right! Let's go!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:55 AM

bearing his children "his?"

I guess you weren't there except for the birth!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 10:57 AM

"I suppose you could just increase the frequency, but since 30 minutes of walking/running burns around 400 calories, you'd need to have sex nearly three times a day just to equal that. "

Doesn't this somehow violate the ban on exercising at night?

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 10:57 AM

I'm chatty today I guess. The silence of Jury Duty yesterday must have had that affect.

So, regarding women running at night. Proud Mama runs at dusk with reflective clothing and a protective scowl on her face. Yes it's still warm at 8pm (this is the boy's bed time so I am still settling him down when she takes off). In the summer, I'm not sure why ladies don't feel comfortable running at 8pm unless the kids are up later and hubby can't get them to bed.

Also, my neigbor's teenage daugthers run at night. Like 10pm. They run together and each one carries a glow stick. Since this is routine for them we (neighbors) are all used to seeing them and I would like to think that if something bad were about to happen we could come to their aid.

Posted by: Proud Papa | June 20, 2007 11:04 AM

What ban? That kind of "exercise" tends to put me right to sleep immediately afterward if done at night! :)

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 11:04 AM

I gained 65 pounds during my pregnancy on a 5 ft 3 inch frame. Not a pretty sight. (And no, I did not eat twinkies 24/7 for 9-mo) My DS is now 2 and I still have 10 more pounds to lose. However its not the weight that's so much the problem, its the waistline. I'm a full two sizes bigger now than pre-baby. I applaud your effort to stay healthy - keep up the good work!

Posted by: To Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 11:07 AM

"I can't believe I am responding to the nerd who is sitting in the dark, eating ho hos, while scratching himself, but I have to do it.

Geek! I actually only gained 20 lbs, the other 45 lbs were baby, all of the related baby stuff, and a lot of fluid because I was almost pre-eclamptic due to high blood pressure b/c the kid was so big, 9 lbs+ at birth. In fact, in the first six weeks I dropped 45 lbs, and have dropped a little more than 10 lbs since then. AND, the average woman gains about 5 lbs post baby due to issues related to birth. So, before you shoot your anon little mouth off, know what you are talking about. Smooches and Happy Wednesday. Now, where did I put my twinkie... "

Actually, I'm a woman who has given birth several times and has never gained more than 25 pounds with a pregnancy. And whose babies were all 8.5 - 9.5 pounds.
So perhaps YOU'RE the one who doesn't know what she's talking about.

Just because the midnight muffins were calling you doesn't mean you had to eat them. Talk about excuses.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:08 AM

Proud papa - kudos to proud mama for wearing reflective clothing..some runners do not realize how hard it is to see them!

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 11:08 AM

Just joined the Y to start swimming.

Re ice hockey, yes, it's a great way to get exercise, but... My husband was in one of those leagues 15 years ago; he played defense. He's a great skater, been skating (at that time) for 15+ years. Broke his ankle; has plates, pins, and rods in it now. Was on crutches and out of work for 6 months.

Sigh.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:10 AM

"Just because the midnight muffins were calling you doesn't mean you had to eat them. Talk about excuses."

Ha, ha!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:10 AM

Finally, something I can comment on! I don't have kids yet, hopefully soon, but I play ice hockey twice a week, once with my men's team (my husband plays as well) and once with my women's team. It's a really fun sport, and much cooler than doing ANYTHING outside this time of year (except maybe swimming). And it doesn't matter how terrible of a player you are, there are tons of people worse than you. Plus, like Brian said, the games are late, so you don't miss out on other things, time with family, etc.

Posted by: HockeyGirl | June 20, 2007 11:16 AM

"Hopefully, your spouse who should love you for you and not for how you look. My DH knows that the c-section scars and extra pounds came from bearing his children."

My spouse loves me for me and not for how I look, but may not be ATTRACTED to me when I have the saggy boobs, fright night c-section scars, swollen vagina lips, and excess blubber. Regardless of the source...

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:18 AM

Actually, I'm a woman who has given birth several times and has never gained more than 25 pounds with a pregnancy.

I know you, your middle name is sanctimonious!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:19 AM

Not to start a flamewar, but...how many of you think, if you met and married when you were in good physical condition, that you should not let yourself go after you get married. Some people are adament about it, think it is somehow "false advertising" if you do this.
Just wondering.

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 11:20 AM

Okay, somebody set me straight here. I never understood how people complained about never having time to exercise because of all the time they spend with their kids. I've seen young kids in action, and they're relentlessly energetic. I used to run ten miles and then immediately take an hour-long kung fu class without much of a problem, but playing chase with a classmate's kid for an hour left me breathless. How can you chase around a bunch of little ones--even for an hour a day--and still claim you get no exercise? Am I missing something here?

"I have never in my life heard that working out right before you go to sleep is bad for you. That's laughable!"

I hear it all the time. From docs, PTs, trainers, etc. It's best to leave at least a one-hour gap to wind down before bed so your metabolism and mind can slow down. However, if the only time you have is right before bed, it's better than nothing.

OT to scarry: I just read that you're having a boy! Congrats!

OT in general: Know what I hate? "Bwahahahaha!" Does anyone actually laugh like this? Are you trying so hard to be insulting that you're willing to make yourself sound this silly?

I could never exercise on my lunch break. I'm one of those slooow people who takes 15 minute showers and 15 minutes to dress after a workout. That leaves only half an hour to work out. I like to take at least 90 minutes. My solution is to work out in the mornings (when the gym is empty) and I'm lucky enough to have flexible hours so it's not a problem if I'm a little late. But early to me means getting up at 6:30 AM and working out from 8-10; it seems you guys get up before 6 even on days you DON'T work out. You guys are making me count my blessings here! :-)

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 11:21 AM

WorkingMomX:

Training for a marathon, like everything else, will have its up days and its down days. Meesh had some really good suggestions. I suggest that you also incorporate the time aspect into your training. Some days you're just not going to feel good and if you focus on distance, you could hurt yourself. On those really horrible days, go out and run for time (e.g. 30 minutes total) and don't worry about whether or not you actually ran X distance. On the flip side for days when you feel really good, run a little further than you had planned so that your heart rate is elevated for Y minutes. I definitely agree with icing your knees down after a long run. You might consider taking "workout candy" (aspirin, ibuprofen, ...) before your long runs to help keep the swelling down, but don't do this on an empty stomach.

Good luck, and most importantly, have fun!

Posted by: MAY | June 20, 2007 11:21 AM

Swimming is a great way to exercise when pregnant. I ran up until I was 8 months along but stopped because my son bounced up and down on my bladder and there were some embarrassing issues. I did deep water running and swam laps. It is great cardio and strength training and it makes you feel so light especially during the last trimester when you feel so heavy.

Perhaps the person who gained 65 lbs was underweight prior to her pregnancy?

Posted by: mountainS | June 20, 2007 11:22 AM

I bought some skates so i could skate with ny daughter. It really is refreshing on a 100 degree day. I am not surprised that JOHN L can do that, wasn't he in the military at some point? Impresses but not surprised.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 11:22 AM

It's often recommended that people avoid exercising at night, for fear that it will be too stimulating and will wreck a good night's sleep. But that's usually not the case, says Shawn Youngstedt, an assistant professor of exercise science at the University of South Carolina in Columbia.

"The evidence indicates that [evening exercise] does not disturb sleep for most people," says Youngstedt, who researches physical activity and sleep.

Posted by: Evidency | June 20, 2007 11:23 AM

Hockey: one of my favorites sayings picked up from working for the Toronto-based company for three years:

A hockey goalie is a person who says "I can make you hit me with that hard rubber object that you hit at high speed. No matter how much you try to miss me, you can't. No matter how fast you make it go, you can't miss me. You'll hit me every time."

Makes sense to me. :-)

Posted by: Army Brat | June 20, 2007 11:24 AM

"Actually, I'm a woman who has given birth several times and has never gained more than 25 pounds with a pregnancy. And whose babies were all 8.5 - 9.5 pounds.
So perhaps YOU'RE the one who doesn't know what she's talking about."

Well, goodie for you. Ever hear that people are different? I gained 60+ lbs with each pregnancy -- 20+ lbs in first trimester even while being hospitalized for severe nausea. Not a twinkie or muffin in sight (couldn't stand sugar). Things like water retention/pre-eclampsia, gestational diabetes, and thyroid issues can really mess with you -- as my doctor will be the first to tell you. Oh, and I lost the weight without much trying afterwards (6 weeks for first, all but 5 lbs within 3 weeks with the second). So believe it or not, it's not just about being a big fat slob -- any more than Scarry's lack of weight gain has anything to do with starving herself.

Posted by: Laura | June 20, 2007 11:25 AM

Proud papa - it really, really depends on where you're running. I felt pretty comfortable walking around my parent's housing development even at 9-10 pm during the summer when I was a teenager - but it was a 2.5 mile loop total, fairly well lit, not many hiding places en-route, in a very low crime area, and I knew someone on pretty much every block.

I can't think of a 5-10 mile decently-lit route near my neighborhood (I don't want to run in total darkness and risk twisting an ankle) - and I certainly can't think of a route of that length where I'd know enough people nearby that my neighbors could "come to my aid" if needed.

Reflective clothing is a great safety precaution, but it's not going to deter a rapist or mugger, and in my neighborhood (as in most of the DC metro area), that's something women have to think about. A scowl just doesn't cut it. A standard routine is even worse - the bad guys would know approximately when those teenage girls will be coming ...I'm just glad that they're running together.

Posted by: notyetamom | June 20, 2007 11:26 AM

Mona

"I never understood how people complained about never having time to exercise because of all the time they spend with their kids."

There's a secret club for parents. Parents can use their kids as an excuse to get out of doing ANYTHING they don't want to do.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:27 AM

I would ignore the other poster who is saying you gained too much weight. All women gain weight differently during pregnancy and sometimes you just can't help what you gain, even if you do eat healthy. I was sick during my first pregnancy and lost ten pounds and only gained ten back and I had a baby who weighed 7 pounds.

This time, I am a little better in the sickness department, but I have still only gained five pounds at 6 months. My mom never gained more then 20 pounds with all her kids, except that one time when she gained 60! Yes, she ate the same way she did as before.

Mona- I am having a boy. He looks pretty big on the screen and in the pictures. Those five pounds are going to good use.

Posted by: scarry | June 20, 2007 11:27 AM

"Re ice hockey, yes, it's a great way to get exercise, but... My husband was in one of those leagues 15 years ago; he played defense. He's a great skater, been skating (at that time) for 15+ years. Broke his ankle; has plates, pins, and rods in it now. Was on crutches and out of work for 6 months."

D'oh. I also broke my ankle (in 3 places) playing hockey. Fortunately I have a desk job, and my wife worked at the same office and could drive me to work. I often wonder why insurance companies don't ask 'do you ski? do you play hockey? do you engage in any other death defying hobbies?' and charge larger premiums. Maybe that's built in to the 20-35 year old wealthier white male premium? Actuaries out there?

As a kid I broke a collar bone playing hockey. I reckon it's not the safest hobby, but it is definitely fun.

Posted by: 1975 | June 20, 2007 11:27 AM

damn typos!

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 11:28 AM

"I never understood how people complained about never having time to exercise because of all the time they spend with their kids. I've seen young kids in action, and they're relentlessly energetic. I used to run ten miles and then immediately take an hour-long kung fu class without much of a problem, but playing chase with a classmate's kid for an hour left me breathless. How can you chase around a bunch of little ones--even for an hour a day--and still claim you get no exercise? Am I missing something here?"

Everyone's young kids aren't that active. Most young kids aren't that active post 6 p.m. Healthy exercise requires keeping your heart rate up to your optimum rate for at least 30 minutes. Chasing kids doesn't keep your heart rate up to that level. That's the problem, actually. It makes you tired but doesn't give you the work-out that would produce endorphins and keep you healthy.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:29 AM

Here are my thoughts regarding exercise at night - if it disturbs your sleep, don't do it. If it doesn't disturb you sleep, carry on.

Mona, sometimes with kids you just can't get things done. Retrospectively, I don't know why, when my kids were little, I couldn't find 15 minutes out of a 14 hour day to shower. I just couldn't though. I think it is much like the mystery of the dryer and the missing sock.

I'll give another shout out to cycling, especially if you have a trail. My older child rides on something called a tag along which is just like a bike but with only the back wheel - it hooks onto the seat of the parent's bike so the child can ride and pedal if they like, but can just ride if they are tired. We have done 2 hour rides frequently with this and a trailer on my bike for the younger child. Add in a picnic and you have a really nice family day together.

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 11:30 AM

OT to dotted: on the magical express as we speak. I hope I can get to my room and get some lunch before the meetinng!

To nutty mama: sounds like you are doing fine. If you work out enough-and it sounds like you do-who cares what the scale says? You may never fit back into your clothes but that doesn't make you a failure. After the second kid the only 8 lbs will sound heavenly. Why stress about numbers that aren't meaningful?

Posted by: atlmom | June 20, 2007 11:31 AM

Lifetime fitness in fairfax and centerville has quality childcare 8am-8PM. 75.00 a month, but my kids LOVE it there and cheap compared to a sitter!

Posted by: ptjobftmom | June 20, 2007 11:31 AM

"There's a secret club for parents. Parents can use their kids as an excuse to get out of doing ANYTHING they don't want to do."

Only somewhat true. Kids as people here know eat up an enormous amount of time and are completely unpredictable and slow moving. Having been a motivated workout person , stress been unfortunately, people (including me) can find a million excuses not to work out.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 11:32 AM

Patrick, yes, I was in the military, but that was long, long ago, and I wasn't in for very long (torn Achilles tendon), so my service hardly accounts for my exercising habits now!

I explain that I just became sick and tired of purchasing a new pants size every six months, and had to do something drastic to put a stop to it. Now I can wear a pants size I wore 15 years ago!

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 11:34 AM

Good topic! I have a pool, so I swim with my daughter after work. Our temperatures are already in triple digits in Phoenix, so a swim after work feels great.

When I was still married and lived in NoVa (Centreville), I would get up and run at 5 a.m. I dropped the baby weight (got back down to a size four after gaining 40 pounds). I stayed out in the open, no trails, but I do understand those women who are reluctant to run while it's still dark.

Posted by: single western mom | June 20, 2007 11:34 AM

"Ever hear that people are different?"

Of course they are. But Nutty Mama originally blamed her "monster baby" (9+ pounds - big deal) and her needing to eat constantly for her 65 pound weight gain. Not the differences between her and other women, or her "almost pre-ecclampsia" - the fact that her baby was big(ish) and that she ate a lot. And she said that not exercising before bed was just an excuse. And then when I said that "being hungry" and having a "big baby" were also excuses, she blasted back that I must be a big hairy man with no clue about childbirth or pregnancy and what it does to your body.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:34 AM

she blasted back that I must be a big hairy man with no clue about childbirth or pregnancy and what it does to your body.

That is what you sounded like to me.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:36 AM

....Actually, I'm a woman who has given birth several times and has never gained more than 25 pounds with a pregnancy. And whose babies were all 8.5 - 9.5 pounds.
So perhaps YOU'RE the one who doesn't know what she's talking about.

Just because the midnight muffins were calling you doesn't mean you had to eat them. Talk about excuses.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 11:08 AM

Hey there anonymous, holier than thou "lady". I know who you are. You're that biz-atch who drives the big SUV and weaves in and out of traffic cutting people off because you're much more important than them. You curse the poor kid working at the Starbucks because he's taking just a bit too long making your triple shot skim caramel foo-foo blah blah coffee drink. I just love, LOVE people like you, and wish I could be as perfect as you.
To Nutty Mama- "Midnight Muffin Madness". Hysterical. I could totally take that another way, but your husband probably wouldn't think too kindly of me!

Posted by: Guy named Marvin | June 20, 2007 11:41 AM

"Not to start a flamewar, but...how many of you think, if you met and married when you were in good physical condition, that you should not let yourself go after you get married. Some people are adament about it, think it is somehow "false advertising" if you do this.
Just wondering."

You can't possibly know how aging will affect your body till it happens. How can it be false advertising when you can't prevent it and you can't predict it?

Posted by: dcgirl1899 | June 20, 2007 11:42 AM

"explain that I just became sick and tired of purchasing a new pants size every six months, and had to do something drastic to put a stop to it. Now I can wear a pants size I wore 15 years ago!"


Congratulations JOHN L. My sister is inspiring me to get off my butt. She has lost 95 lbs and is very disciplined now. She is like a new person, more confident and happy.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 11:42 AM

Altmom and others, thanks. I needed to hear that what I am experiencing is not uncommon. All of my Interet research came up with nothing.

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 11:43 AM

Myother comments didn't get posted but-to moxiemom:

I just would feel guilty getting up early and lvng the kids with dh in the am -but, maybe w the au pair it will be easier -maybe one day a wk in the early am and one day during lunch and I could do way better than my current condition...

Posted by: atlmom | June 20, 2007 11:44 AM

dcgirl1899 - I hear what you are saying, but what I meant was people who quit exercising and pack on the lbs. after just a couple years of marriage.

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 11:44 AM

"Mona

"I never understood how people complained about never having time to exercise because of all the time they spend with their kids."

There's a secret club for parents. Parents can use their kids as an excuse to get out of doing ANYTHING they don't want to do."

Like anything else, it depends...
If you are a SAHM, I don't get it either. If you work out of the home full time, as I did, it is much harder to find time. My routine when the kids were pre-school and early elementary school was to leave work, pick kids up from day care, go home, talk to kids for a few minutes, settle them with toys or another activity, cook dinner, eat dinner, clean up while daddy played with kids (kitchen too small for more than one person during clean-up, we just bumped into each other). By now it is 7:00 or 7:30. Supervise homework, take a walk (kids are tired and don't run as much this late). It's hard to raise heart rate when you are stopping to look at bugs, talk to neighbors, etc. Back home for bathtime, storytime, bedtime etc. By now, it's 9:30 - 10:00 or so. I love reading with the kids at night. Even though DH also reads to the kids, I enjoy it and don't want to give it up. My children have always had later bedtimes. I just don't care to put them to bed at 8:00 when I don't see them until 5:30 or 6:00.

I'm just giving my perspective as an honest repy to Mona. If anyone still thinks it's making excuses, that's OK. I know that I could excercise more, but I really would rather be spending the time with my children.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:46 AM

Oh, and NuttyMama when I am not sick, I eat all the time. Everything from chili dogs to apples. I think it really just depends on your baby.

I think 9 pounds plus is a monster baby too, and next time I send my husband out for something for me to eat, I am going to tell him I have "Midnight Muffin Madness."

Posted by: scarry | June 20, 2007 11:46 AM

I think fitness is important for kids. I am amazed at teh number of fat little kids. It seems that when I was growing up , we were all stick thin. The kids a re finally getting big enough to ride bikes,play some sports etc and that is fun to practice with them.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 11:48 AM

me

"dcgirl1899 - I hear what you are saying, but what I meant was people who quit exercising and pack on the lbs. after just a couple years of marriage."

Sexual boredom with the spouse is the
#1 reason (besides child bearing) that people pack on the pounds after a couple of years of marriage.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:48 AM

dcgirl1899...
You can't predict what aging will do to your body but you CAN predict what eating too much and exercising too little will do.

Get real girl!!!

Posted by: Me Again | June 20, 2007 11:49 AM

I think it really just depends on your baby.

I meant to say body.

Posted by: scarry | June 20, 2007 11:49 AM

atlmom: we used the magical express also. Good service all around. Have fun!


And people chided me way back for my special gym....it works for me. Just returned from an intense butt kicking.

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 11:50 AM

"Guy Named Marvin," Thank you. I made the mistake of biting and have been since kicking myself. Oh well. I will have to remember to ignore "them," like I normally do. And another thanks for the "Midnight Muffin Madness" comment. I will share that with my husband. He will get a kick out of it.

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 11:52 AM

Excuses are for everyone. I don't have kids and I still make excuses for why I don't look the same way I did in college (quitting smoking, desk job, etc.). I think that being pregnant or tired after chasing kids all day are fantastic excuses compared with mine.

What it took for me was a visit to the doctor who explained that quitting smoking and exercising will lower my outrageously high cholesterol level. Also, my dentist said that exercising will relieve stress and ease my TMJ problems. The good effects far outweighed the lame excuses, so I started working out.

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 11:53 AM

WorkingMomX:

Congratulations on training for a marathon! I have done several. One way to get the long runs in is to start early. The group I trained with would meet at 5am on Saturday to do long runs during the summer because of the heat. This worked out well for parents because they'd get back early enough to have time with kids. Depending on the length of the run sometimes they'd get back just as the kids were waking up.

One mother I trained with would hire a babysitter to spend the night before and be there when her kids woke up to care for them until the Mom got back from running. I think she had a neighborhood teenager so the price wasn't outrageous.

I don't know if you have a support group but one option is the Galloway program depending on where you live. The website is www.runinjuryfree.com. Look under training groups to see if there is one in your area.

Posted by: dai | June 20, 2007 11:54 AM

"If anyone still thinks it's making excuses, that's OK. I know that I could excercise more, but I really would rather be spending the time with my children."

Another member of the secret club for parents.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 11:59 AM

"Not to start a flamewar, but...how many of you think, if you met and married when you were in good physical condition, that you should not let yourself go after you get married. Some people are adament about it, think it is somehow "false advertising" if you do this.
Just wondering."

We never really discussed this, but he certainly didn't get into this thinking that I would get better looking over time. I think you have an obligation to take care of yourself, but also accept the fact that ultimately the miles under the hood will show up on the body.

Atl mom - good luck, as they get older you may find it easier too. YOu might be able to run while they are at soccer practice. My daughter takes classes at the YMCA and lots of the parents sneak in a quick work out during the class. Don't forget that time alone with DH might be a treat for the kids and DH.

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 12:00 PM

dcgirl1899 -- After a couple of years (or more) of marriage, there's a lot more than tight abs and toned arms that contribute to sexual attraction.

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 12:01 PM

"There's a secret club for parents. Parents can use their kids as an excuse to get out of doing ANYTHING they don't want to do."

You mean like following standard TSA regulations regarding outside liquids, and NOT dumping those liquids on the floor?

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 12:05 PM

Another member of the secret club for parents.
=====================
And I suppose you should look like Brad Pitt or Angelina given the fact that you then have no valid excuse.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:06 PM

I had a real hard time getting regular exercise when the kids were young. Ultimately, I felt glad to make a 2x per week, lunch hour exercise class with reasonable regularity. When they were both in school I got better, and now I still do that class, and some activity in the wee early morning hours. Here in Seattle in the summer it's easy -- our sunrise is at about 5:10 a.m. these days. So I can run, bike or swim outside. In the winter I drag my sorry *** down into the basement for a session on my bicycle (I have a trainer) or rowing. Definitely buying a couple carefully chosen pieces of equipment has helped. I probably average 4 work outs a week. Not perfect, but not bad for a woman with a full time job and two kids.

Posted by: RosieReader | June 20, 2007 12:08 PM

"dcgirl1899 -- After a couple of years (or more) of marriage, there's a lot more than tight abs and toned arms that contribute to sexual attraction"

Like what - sexual boredom or poor personal hygiene?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:09 PM

"And I suppose you should look like Brad Pitt or Angelina given the fact that you then have no valid excuse."

Nobody said that the secret parent club has VALID excuses. Perhaps I'm a huge fat slob who eats muffins at midnight and doesn't exercise but blames it on being a huge fat slob who doesn't exercise instead of a fetus or a child.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:10 PM

I'm passionate enough about running to not want to give it up. DD loves the running stroller (snacks essential, toys optional), Stroller Daddy has been a fantastic running partner. Our treadmill was the best investment this year given our schedules and commutes (and DD doesn't mind at all watching a DVD while we treadmill as long as she gets her turn). Sure, I haven't been able to run as much with #2 as I did with DD, but I'm out there (it's the life I have that gives me the confidence to wear a bikini at 36 weeks :).
Our committment to running teaches our daughter fitness, race etiquette, and how to mix the activity you love with the people you love. Also provides incredible stroller naps for her. We're looking forward to getting the double.
WorkingMomX -- I've done over 20 marathons since DD was born, to include a personal best. Training is part of the whole experience, enjoy it. We've trained solo and with groups, liked it both ways. Good luck.

Posted by: Stroller Momma | June 20, 2007 12:14 PM

Nobody said that the secret parent club has VALID excuses. Perhaps I'm a huge fat slob who eats muffins at midnight and doesn't exercise but blames it on being a huge fat slob who doesn't exercise instead of a fetus or a child.

===============================
You are clearly an unhappy person.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:17 PM

"Sure, I haven't been able to run as much with #2 as I did with DD, but I'm out there (it's the life I have that gives me the confidence to wear a bikini at 36 weeks :)."

While performing life-saving surgery on third-world country starving orphans...

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:18 PM

"I used to be very active, but to be honest, I would rather keep the weight I've gained than lose any more time from my family. Work interferes with my life way too much. sigh."


Nobody said that the secret parent club has VALID excuses. Perhaps I'm a huge fat slob who eats muffins at midnight and doesn't exercise but blames it on being a huge fat slob who doesn't exercise instead of a fetus or a child.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 12:10 PM

Actually, if you read closely, it seems tht the person is blaming it on her job being too consuming, not her family.


Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:19 PM

I would love to take a lunch hour exercise class, but I'm only allowed 40 minutes for lunch.

Posted by: i'm a peon | June 20, 2007 12:21 PM

"You are clearly an unhappy person."

How come it is, that every time someone around here states that they're content with their life or that they take responsibility for how they are that the only rebuttal is "you must be very unhappy"?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:21 PM

"While performing life-saving surgery on third-world country starving orphans..."

Stroller Mama is really Princess Mona the Savior of the World's Orphans!!!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:23 PM

"Actually, if you read closely, it seems tht the person is blaming it on her job being too consuming, not her family."

Work - another common "excuse" for being out of shape.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:24 PM

"Not to start a flamewar, but...how many of you think, if you met and married when you were in good physical condition, that you should not let yourself go after you get married. Some people are adament about it, think it is somehow "false advertising" if you do this.
Just wondering."

I think that "letting yourself go" is different than making choices as a couple that prioritize family time on weekdays over one of you out at the gym while the other dines alone with the kids or gets them off to school. Our kids will only be young once. Healthy eating is part of our lifestyle. That's enough pressure already. We love every line, wrinkle, and the occasional vericose vein in each other's bodies. They represent the time we've been life partners.

It's important to explore this attitude with your partner before you marry and determine up-front whether he or she or you have realistic or unrealistic expectations about the aging process so neither of you ends up kicked to the curb at 43 because you are 43, gravity has reared its ugly head, and you don't have an extra $40K for either elective surgery, or a personal trainer to work with you 4 days per week.

There's a difference between giving in to your personal version of midnight madness and opting for a wardrobe of double-knit separates, and acknowledging the impact of declining metabolism with grace and style.

Posted by: Megan's Neighbor | June 20, 2007 12:25 PM

My 6 am run is regularly interrupted by a 530 am wakeup scream by my 2 year old. After a week without running, my husband could see that I was losing my mind. See for me, exercising is as much about my mental health as my physical health. I think this is true for most people.

I let the toddler holler this morning and I left the house with my ipod blaring and my mind free to wander for a hour without interruption or stress. I feel like a million bucks.

Not only did I get my coveted time to myself to work up a sweat, but the toddler fell back asleep and was in much happier mood than if she had been up since before dawn.

I cannot exercise late at night because I cannot fall asleep. For years I made excuses just like I've seen others post here. But when I realized that I was living my life clouded by depression, I knew I had to stop with the excuses. I restarted my routine by signing up for a 6:15 a.m TuTh boot camp - outdoors, rain or shine. What a great way to get yourself back into a routine. Now, I run three times a week, sometimes four, early in the morning.

Find a morning class and sign up with a friend. My husband had to change his morning routine to fit mine, but he did and we are all happier for it.

Posted by: Jill | June 20, 2007 12:26 PM

How come it is, that every time someone around here states that they're content with their life or that they take responsibility for how they are that the only rebuttal is "you must be very unhappy"?

=========================
Are you even remotely literate? This poster has done nothing to indicate that they are content or satisfied with their life. All they have done is make derisive comments about people with children finding it challenging to make time to exercise. Generally happy people don't try to make others unhappy.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:27 PM

Work - another common "excuse" for being out of shape.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 12:24 PM

Work - how I support my family. Perhaps you have other options like a Sugar Daddy.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:28 PM

There are many different levels of fitness. Someone who wants to run marathons or 5Ks or triatholons is going to have a different exercise regimen than someone who wants to have 30 minutes of cardio three times per week. Everyone chooses their own priorities in life and having minimal exercise is not such an awful thing as long as you have an overall healthy lifestyle.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:29 PM

"There's a difference between giving in to your personal version of midnight madness and opting for a wardrobe of double-knit separates"


I nominate for Quote of the Day!

Posted by: Elaine | June 20, 2007 12:30 PM

Jill - how did you like the boot camp? I have been considering joining one.

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 12:33 PM

" This poster has done nothing to indicate that they are content or satisfied with their life."

That sounds a lot like pATRICK!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:33 PM

"While performing life-saving surgery on third-world country starving orphans..."

Close, I'm hoping to take on medical school when I retire from defending this country so people can say whatever they want in blogs.

Posted by: Stroller Momma | June 20, 2007 12:34 PM

It would be interesting to know work schedules, commute time and home situation (a SAH spouse, live in nanny/au pair, daycare out of the home requiring more commute time to and from daycare, number of children) when reading others' exercise solutions.

John L, I believe you don't have children yet. You go to bed fairly early and get up incredibly early for exercise. How many hours do you work per day? How much time do you have with spouse daily?

atlmom - why do you feel guilty leaving child with dh in the a.m. but not with an au pair?

I feel like I can't squeeze any more time out of my day for exercise. Some of your stories are inspiring, but I still have the little thoughts saying "Yes, but I bet they don't have _____ to do like I do." If I saw a story of someone with similar time constraints, then I may become more inspired.

Posted by: just curious | June 20, 2007 12:39 PM

"Are you even remotely literate? ..... Generally happy people don't try to make others unhappy."

Well then, you must win the prize for unhappiness, since you've called people illiterate, pronounced them unhappy when you have no idea about their lives, and have been sarcastic - or were those things done to make others happy?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:40 PM

"I have never in my life heard that working out right before you go to sleep is bad for you. That's laughable!"

So you're laughing at the University of Maryland?

from http://www.umm.edu/sleep/sleep_hyg.html

Exercise regularly, but not right before bed. Regular exercise, particularly in the afternoon, can help deepen sleep. Strenuous exercise within the 2 hours before bedtime, however, can decrease your ability to fall asleep.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 09:43 AM

The UofM says you may have trouble falling asleep, which, from my experience is true, but where does it say this is "bad for you".

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:44 PM

NuttyMom:
Don't let the trolls drag you under the bridge...midnight muffins sound healthier than the pepperoni & extra cheese cravings someone might have -- not that I know anything at all about that...

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 12:44 PM

"Yes, but I bet they don't have _____ to do like I do."

Lovely. You read that other people work hard to fit exercise into their schedules, even after reading that they're getting up at 3:30 am to work out, working out during their lunch hour, and working out at night after their children are in bed - and you don't think "wow, they're working really hard to fit it all in - that must be tough", you think that their lives can't possibly be as hard as yours.


Posted by: stop with the excuses!! | June 20, 2007 12:45 PM

Regarding "truth in advertising", I think that has a lot more to do with attitude than body shape. That is, if you marry at 25, then you know what the 25yo body looks like but cannot predict the future. However, you can tell if you're marrying someone who takes reasonable care of themselves without being a complete obsessive (equally bad in its own way, I think). The trick is that you have to know your partner well enough to know their attitudes about taking care of themselves, just as you need to know how they feel about work, family, pets, and so forth.

People do change, of course. I'm about to remarry, and at 37 am more serious about good diet and working out than I was at 20, when I married first. But my partner knows me well enough to predict what my body is likely to do--IOW, that I will be in generally good shape and eat well, with occasional lapses until I complain that I am getting pudgy and need to correct, and then I will be back in good shape. THAT is truth in advertising, not the way my body looks at a point in time.

Posted by: twisty | June 20, 2007 12:47 PM

"You can't predict what aging will do to your body but you CAN predict what eating too much and exercising too little will do.

Get real girl!!!"

I am as real as they get...I was a 3-sport varsity athlete in college, with a body fat percentage hovering around 14% (considered too low by current standards) and 3-hour-a-day workouts 6 days a week...Fast-forward 15 years...I am now a white-collar professional who travels 2-3 weeks out of every month (and yes, my workout gear travels with me) who couldn't possibly maintain the body I had then. Could either of us have predicted what I'd look like 15 years later (and no, I haven't had kids yet)? Not a chance...the body I had then was the result of TOTAL FOCUS, and as I've gotten older my focus has changed, as have my hormones, my metabolism, my sleep patterns, everything. I'm a much healthier eater than I was back then, and I still exercise regularly, but time marches on and sometimes it marches across your butt, your boobs, and your tummy. If someone has an expectation that these changes aren't going to happen, they need to adjust those expectations or they shouldn't get married - they should just keep dating a succession of 25-year-olds so they never have to look at saggy boobs or cellulite if it's that offensive to them.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:47 PM

"If I saw a story of someone with similar time constraints, then I may become more inspired."

No, you'd come up with more inventive excuses. It's human nature.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:47 PM

Well then, you must win the prize for unhappiness, since you've called people illiterate, pronounced them unhappy when you have no idea about their lives, and have been sarcastic - or were those things done to make others happy?

=====================
Being happy and allowing people to be bullies are two entirely different things. Nice try though.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:49 PM

Go STROLLER MOMMA and STROLLER DADDY!!!

Posted by: MAY | June 20, 2007 12:50 PM

"Close, I'm hoping to take on medical school when I retire from defending this country so people can say whatever they want in blogs."

You must be a very unhappy person.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:51 PM

I think working out before you sleep is just not as good for you, instead of being actively bad for you. Metabolism is revved up for several hours after exercise, and it's better to be awake and able to boost your ability to burn fat than sleep through that benefit, and it does make it harder for some people to sleep. BUT, better to exercise at night than not at all.

Let's not turn this into Snippy Wednesday!

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 12:51 PM

"Stroller Mama is really Princess Mona the Savior of the World's Orphans!!!

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 12:23 PM "

This is NOT TRUE. Stroller Mama nowhere near as sanctimonious and judgmental as me!

::restrains self from emitting obnoxious "bwahaha" evil laugh::

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 12:52 PM

"Yes, but I bet they don't have _____ to do like I do."

Lovely. You read that other people work hard to fit exercise into their schedules, even after reading that they're getting up at 3:30 am to work out, working out during their lunch hour, and working out at night after their children are in bed - and you don't think "wow, they're working really hard to fit it all in - that must be tough", you think that their lives can't possibly be as hard as yours.


Posted by: stop with the excuses!! | June 20, 2007 12:45 PM


You interpreted this incorrectly. I am hoping that someone fills in the blank to show me that if they can do it, so can I. I would love to work out during lunch hour, but lunch is short, only 30 minutes and my job is such that I can't eat while working. If I heard from someone else who can't squeeze it in during lunch and also can't get up at 3:30, then their advice might be inspirational. i was definitely not trying to say "poor me, my life is so tough". Why is everything perceived to be negative instead of an honest inquiry?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:53 PM

and Stroller Mama sounds smart too

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 12:54 PM

time marches on and sometimes it marches across your butt, your boobs, and your tummy.

And sometimes Time brings an entire army and uses your butt, your boobs and your tummy as its exclusive training facility.

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 12:55 PM

"Stroller Mama nowhere near as sanctimonious and judgmental as me!"

You are clearly a very unhappy person.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:01 PM

sameI really confused about the mothers who are post-baby fatties for YEARS after childbirth.

My waist shrunk back to its normal 20 inch size within a week after the birth of my daughter. My doctor said it had something to do with elasticity and running in the family (my mother was the same way after the birth of 6 kids).

Breastfeeding melted TONS of post baby weight.

Posted by: Gotta wonder? | June 20, 2007 1:02 PM

Mona,

Back to your tarot cards please!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:04 PM

First, congrats to John L for waking up at 3:30! Most articles I read about how to do this are by some person says something like: "Oh, it's easy. I just wake up early -- at 6 or so -- and I'm able to work out and be back by 8 to get them to school." Get real -- I have to be at my desk at 8, not lounging around my house taking a shower. So John is the first person I've heard about who tells it like it is. You have to get up *early* to be up before the kids!

As to the sleeping after you work out at night... I know my body, and while I sleep fine after an evening workout, I'm pretty keyed up for at least an hour or more when I get home. My DS wakes up at 5, so I have to go to bed early. So... evening workouts don't work for me.

I've found a crazy routine of working it in when I can. Sometimes it's lunch, sometimes after work (my mom watches DS) and then DH and I take turns on weekends. It works out, but it's not as easy as it was pre-kids when I worked out 90 minutes a day 6 days a week.

Posted by: San Diego Mama | June 20, 2007 1:06 PM

"I am hoping that someone fills in the blank to show me that if they can do it, so can I."

Well, you haven't told us exactly what your schedule is so nobody really knows how to tell you where to fit in your exercise. But in general I would suggest to someone who has a commute, more than one child, in out-of-home-daycare, and a full time job that they find a way to exercise at home 3 days a week for 30 minutes at a time. You could even do 2 of those days on the weekends when you presumably don't have a commute & daycare & work to worry about, leaving yourself just one day a week where you get up 30 minutes earlier to walk or run on the treadmill. If that doesn't float your boat, then pick a day to do it after the kids are in bed while you're reading the newspaper or watching TV or crocheting or wahtever it is you do to relax.


Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:10 PM

sameI really confused about the mothers who are post-baby fatties for YEARS after childbirth.

My waist shrunk back to its normal 20 inch size within a week after the birth of my daughter. My doctor said it had something to do with elasticity and running in the family (my mother was the same way after the birth of 6 kids).

Breastfeeding melted TONS of post baby weight.

Posted by: Gotta wonder? | June 20, 2007 01:02 PM


You have no idea, gotta wonder, whether breastfeeding had any impact at all. You only know that you got your body back and you've heard anecdotally that breastfeeders tend to claim this effect. Congratulations, but ixnay on the silly pro breastfeeding propaganda.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:10 PM

My very thin wife's body bounced right back after every pregnancy too. NEVER EVER has she bragged about this. Maybe she's polite, maybe she respects karma.

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 1:11 PM

You must be a very unhappy person.

You must be a very unhappy person.

You must be a very unhappy person.

Can we be done with this? It wastes everyone's limited reading time to repetitively cut and paste the same comment ad nauseum.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:12 PM

A question for those of you who work out during your lunch hour: the gym my work uses has nice showers. However, there's no way to walk there, change, workout, shower, and walk back within the lunch hour. I sweat like it's nobody's business and even if I were able to jump in the shower, I wouldn't have the time to dry my hair. And I HAVE to wash my hair after a workout b/c my scalp gets so sweaty. What's the secret?

Posted by: Arlington, VA | June 20, 2007 1:14 PM

"First, congrats to John L for waking up at 3:30!"

Yes, and I hope you have a top-of-the- line security system guarding your loved ones while you are bebopping around the 'hood at this hour!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:14 PM

"It wastes everyone's limited reading time to repetitively cut and paste the same comment ad nauseum."

You must be a very slow reader.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:14 PM

"I sweat like it's nobody's business and even if I were able to jump in the shower, I wouldn't have the time to dry my hair. And I HAVE to wash my hair after a workout b/c my scalp gets so sweaty."

Gak. I just horked up my lunch from reading about Arlington's sweaty head.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:17 PM

Princess Mona the Savior of the World's Orphans!!!

Anyone besides me appreciate the irony of someone calling MONA a "princess"? ;)

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:17 PM

The sad part is, the cats have figured out when I wake up, so they start showing up around 3:00 am to see if I'm awake yet. By then my own internal clock is getting ready to wake me up anyway, so I'm finding myself being awakened by a meowing cat a half hour early.

Just curious,

No, I don't have children (yet). There's usually about 2-4 hours in the evening and an hour or so in the morning when both me and my wife are awake and capable of conversations on weekdays. I work 9 hours a day (only 4 hours on Friday) and have a 12 minute commute to my workplace.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 1:17 PM

My very thin wife's body bounced right back after every pregnancy too. NEVER EVER has she bragged about this. Maybe she's polite, maybe she respects karma.

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 01:11 PM

Arlington Dad, as I'm sure you know, you are a lucky, lucky man to have a wife of such character - the pre-pregnancy body is icing on the cake.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:20 PM

"Breastfeeding melted TONS of post baby weight.

Posted by: Gotta wonder? | June 20, 2007 01:02 PM"

The nurse in my OB's office told me that BF helps you get back to pre-pregnancy weight faster, but you can still get there without BF.

"My waist shrunk back to its normal 20 inch size within a week after the birth of my daughter. My doctor said it had something to do with elasticity and running in the family (my mother was the same way after the birth of 6 kids)."

Maybe the doctor knows what he is talking about. There are more factors involved than what you eat and how much you exercise.

Posted by: lurker | June 20, 2007 1:20 PM

«Can we be done with this? It wastes everyone's limited reading time to repetitively cut and paste the same comment ad nauseum.»

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 01:12 PM

«nausea» - first declension Latin noun. Accusative is «nauseam» not «nauseum». Please write «ad nauseam», not «ad nauseum». Thank you.

Posted by: Abu Ibrahim | June 20, 2007 1:22 PM

Arlington, VA

"A question for those of you who work out during your lunch hour: What's the secret?"

With 1 hour for exercise & shower & travel time to and from exercise venue, there is no secret. It can't be done. You stink when you get back to work.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:22 PM

"A question for those of you who work out during your lunch hour: What's the secret?"

The secret is, you can take 30 minutes max for your workout, you will be somewhat disheveled the rest of the day, and it works best if you work in an administrative capacity, or other non-exempt role and can count on getting that lunch hour each day. Not that I'm jealous or anything.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:25 PM

""Stroller Mama nowhere near as sanctimonious and judgmental as me!"

You are clearly a very unhappy person.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 01:01 PM"

I am very unhappy. Just look at that sentence! I left out "is." Where are the grammar police?!?! Dropping the ball!

"My very thin wife's body bounced right back after every pregnancy too. NEVER EVER has she bragged about this. Maybe she's polite, maybe she respects karma.

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 01:11 PM"

Have to admit, I haven't respected karma, I bragged too much, made too many judgments, and two nights ago I discovered the first signs of ::gasp:: cellulite. Too many excuses ("I can't sleep in my new place so I can't get up early enough to go to the gym," "I have too much to do," and "I'm on the breakup diet--Ben & Jerry's plus no exercise," even though the breakup occurred months ago, and we're back together now). No more--I'm back at the gym and slowly battling my sweet cravings, one M&M at a time.

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 1:25 PM

You must be a very unhappy person.

"Can we be done with this? It wastes everyone's limited reading time to repetitively cut and paste the same comment ad nauseum."

You must be a very unhappy person.
And naive.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:26 PM

Am I the only one who thinks that a 20 inch waist isn't necessarily "normal"?
Yes I am jealous, before you ask...

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 1:27 PM

When I was into working out there was a gym literally next door to my office. 40 minute workout, 5 min cool down, 5 min shower,5 minute get dressed go back to work, Very easy to work out, now 1 hr commute each way, 2 kids,basketball,skating, dinner, baths, etc etc.. . I will find a way though.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:31 PM

"Am I the only one who thinks that a 20 inch waist isn't necessarily "normal"?
Yes I am jealous, before you ask..."

If the bust is 26" and the hips are 40", I wouldn't be jealous >).

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:31 PM

My waist shrunk back to its normal 20 inch size within a week after the birth of my daughter. My doctor said it had something to do with elasticity and running in the family (my mother was the same way after the birth of 6 kids).

Breastfeeding melted TONS of post baby weight.

Posted by: Gotta wonder? | June 20, 2007 01:02 PM

What I gotta wonder about is whether your tape-measure is broken. The waist of a size 0 - 1 is 23" - 24."

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:31 PM

"My waist shrunk back to its normal 20 inch size within a week after the birth of my daughter."

Scarlet, is that you?

Posted by: Rhett | June 20, 2007 1:33 PM

"40 minute workout, 5 min cool down, 5 min shower,5 minute get dressed go back to work"

but pATRICK, when did you eat? Isn't eating properly also part of a healthy lifestyle?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:33 PM

"What I gotta wonder about is whether your tape-measure is broken. The waist of a size 0 - 1 is 23" - 24." "

What I gotta wonder about is whether Gotta Wonder is a Freaking Liar.


Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:33 PM

"but pATRICK, when did you eat? Isn't eating properly also part of a healthy lifestyle?"

Forgot to add 5-10min eating in there somewhere, used up my whole hour. This conversation is making me remember how much I liked it.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:36 PM

Eat, schmeat.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:36 PM

pATRICK
"40 minute workout, 5 min cool down, 5 min shower,5 minute get dressed go back to work"

5 min shower isn't enough time! And please, brush your teeth!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:37 PM

I lost weight in my 40s.

Know how?

I started walking or exercising 30 minutes a day, 'cause I freed up some time from chasing after kids.

I also put my fork down. Cutting out the afternoon trip to the vending machine to fortify myself before the soccer Mom scene helped a lot!

More energy going out, less calories coming in. If you're honest the scale will fall.

Unless you've gone into menopause at 40 you don't have an excuse.

So turn your terminal off and go take a walk!

Posted by: RoseG | June 20, 2007 1:37 PM

I never understood a 5 minute shower. I'm in there 15-20 minutes.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:38 PM

I never understood a 5 minute shower. I'm in there 15-20 minutes.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 01:38 PM

Guess it's better than no shower at all..

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 1:40 PM

"I never understood a 5 minute shower. I'm in there 15-20 minutes."

So cut it down to 5 minutes and you've freed up 70-90 minutes a week for exercising. Voila.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:40 PM

In my experience after 35 the lbs seem to be more entrenced than prior. Really, it seems they are haning on for dear life. I could lose the 15 lbs I want to lose, but I would have to work out 6 days a week and eat about 1000 calories a day. I personally decided that it was about finding a balance between how much extra weight I'm comfortable carrying, how much I want to work out and how much of my time I'd like to spend on other things. Do I look like Christie Brinkley? Nope, but I know that I'm happy and healthy and my husband is happy too. You don't have to exercise all the time and be perfect to be fit and happy. MY 2 cents.

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 1:41 PM

So turn your terminal off and go take a walk!

Posted by: RoseG | June 20, 2007 01:37 PM

another chick with a Sugar Daddy.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:42 PM

5 min shower isn't enough time! And please, brush your teeth!

??,5 minutes for a man is plenty of time. I think it is too little for a woman though probably. By the way I always brush my teeth after lunch thank you.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:43 PM

"I never understood a 5 minute shower. I'm in there 15-20 minutes."

For which I thank you!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:43 PM

Well, I think you look great, Moxiemom.

Posted by: Patrick Dempsey | June 20, 2007 1:44 PM

Mona,

"Back to your tarot cards please!"

Yes, Mona tell us when they predict that the rude anons will either go away or forget all the silly little facts we all post.

And, I have to say that some women are just very lucky to be born with a high metabolism and skinny waists.

Posted by: scarry | June 20, 2007 1:45 PM

I think that there are many people carrying some extra pounds who are really NOT carrying some extra pounds. The ideal body in many minds is not really ideal.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:45 PM

RE: the 5 minute shower

"Guess it's better than no shower at all.."

Not if you're looking for a blow job, mister!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:46 PM

Since my wife is not reading this, I can ask. Do women normally not need to shower again to go out? ,(like for dinner etc)in a normal day, not like working out. I always do but my wife says it's unnecessary. I think it is vaguely gross, although my wife always seems flower fresh. Is that just a guy thing?

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:47 PM

I get lots of exercise - jumping to conclusions, beating a dead horse, and running around in circles.

Posted by: anon | June 20, 2007 1:47 PM

Well, I think you look great, Moxiemom.

Posted by: Patrick Dempsey | June 20, 2007 01:44 PM

Thank you Patrick, I was just thinking about you! You don't look so bad yourself, all sexy being a hands on daddy and stuff. MmMm

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 1:48 PM

RE: the 5 minute shower

"Guess it's better than no shower at all.."

Not if you're looking for a blow job, mister!

Haha, scrub it hard.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:48 PM

I think that men perspire more, so may need to shower more. Or, it may be that he takes a 5 minute shower and mine is 15 minutes. :).

Posted by: to pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:50 PM

"Mona,

"Back to your tarot cards please!"

Yes, Mona tell us when they predict that the rude anons will either go away or forget all the silly little facts we all post."

Oh come on, tarot cards was classic. She said they were her religion. How can you forget that?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:50 PM

Patrick,

Let me get this straight; you're not talking about showering after working out before going out to eat, you're talking about taking a shower just because you were at WORK?

What do you do, pave roads for a living? If you're in an office all day you shouldn't need another shower whether you are a man OR a woman.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 1:53 PM

Don't get me wrong, I can easliy stay in the shower for 20 long, enjoyable minutes too. I can condense it though when in a hurry. A good bath with the sunday paper is tops too.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 1:53 PM

"Do women normally not need to shower again to go out?"

Depends on the man, the woman, and what they've been doing (and eating) during the day. Apparently your wife does not feel the need, but you do. That's really the end of it.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:54 PM

Patrick - If I go to happy hour right after work, obviously I don't shower, but if I go home first I usually do. No, I don't pave roads for a living, and I probably don't "need" the shower, just makes me feel better.

Posted by: Me | June 20, 2007 1:55 PM

scarry, unfortunately, they only go away when you stop feeding them, and even then, I think they have some sort of super-troll power that allows them to stick around for weeks after. Or they multiply, allowing one to pick up where its predecessor left off.

Yeah, I said tarot cards WERE my religion, and that's definitely ALL I said on the subject. I can definitely be defined by my religion, tarotcardism.

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 1:56 PM

"You can lose the weight in your 40s when your kids get older and you've got more free time."

But in the meantime you've made your body work harder than it really had to. Be kind to yourself. A few of my friends said using a pedometer helped.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 1:57 PM

pATRICK,
I agree with you - shower after working out and before going out. In the summer a 5 minute shower before going out or going to bed even if you didn't work out is recommended.

Posted by: KLB SS MD | June 20, 2007 1:57 PM

John L

"If you're in an office all day you shouldn't need another shower whether you are a man OR a woman."

John

Please smell your crotch RIGHT THIS MOMENT!

Yes, you do need another shower. ESPECIALLY if you plan to hook up with someone.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:03 PM

"Do women normally not need to shower again to go out?"

"Depends on the man, the woman, and what they've been doing (and eating) during the day. Apparently your wife does not feel the need, but you do. That's really the end of it."

Until people avoid you because YOU STINK!

Smell your underwear!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:07 PM

Yeah, I said tarot cards WERE my religion, and that's definitely ALL I said on the subject. I can definitely be defined by my religion, tarotcardism.

you are right, there was something else, not a voodoo doll, but somewhere in that neighborhood.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:10 PM

"You can lose the weight in your 40s when your kids get older and you've got more free time."

And you are going through menopause, when the slightest amount of exercise/stress can trigger a massive hot flash!

Great plan!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:12 PM

"they only go away when you stop feeding them"

Or when the regular blog topic is actually interesting and conversation provoking.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:17 PM

MONA, I put that (tarotcardism) in google and nothing came up. What is it?

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 2:18 PM

OK, about the pregnancy weight... Let's be kind to each other here. There are lots of reasons to gain weight during pregnancy.

Before I go on, here's my full disclosure: I gained 20 lbs. during my pregnancy, so I am not saying this to defend myself.

I vomited every single day of my pregnancy due to a condition called hyperemesis. By my 7th month I had only gained 10 pounds. Then, in my last month I developed pre-eclampsia and I gained 10 more in just a couple of weeks. I also had gestational diabetes. And, since I was still throwing up evey day at the end, I know my weight gain was a combination of those two factors -- definitely not overeating. I gained a total of 20 pounds during my pregnancy, and half of it was in the last month. So if you gain at a normal rate it is possible to gain lots of weight from medical conditions.

Now, that said, I do know people who use pregnancy as an excuse to indulge. In my office, a pregnant woman was eyeing a plate of cookies, and a coworker said, "Go ahead, it's OK -- you're pregnant!" I almost feel off my chair. So we all know that attitude exists. But I don't think it's necessary to be mean to people who gained weight during pregnancy. We all have different circumstances, and some people are genetically "luckier" than others.

Posted by: San Diego Mama | June 20, 2007 2:19 PM

pATRICK, I shower once a day (plus an extra shower after a workout). I can't imagine showering just to go out--it would kill my skin, I already have to moisturize twice a day. Mr Bee only showers every 2-3 days when not working out, which I would think was gross in principle, but in practice he just doesn't get that dirty--I assumed for ages that he showered daily after I left for work.

We both have healthy diets & wear mostly natural fibres though, both things I've heard can really affect a person's chemistry.

Posted by: worker bee | June 20, 2007 2:19 PM

And you are going through menopause, when the slightest amount of exercise/stress can trigger a massive hot flash!

Great plan!

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 02:12 PM

Now THAT's what I call making excuses. I'm willing to defer my ideal exercise routine -- the one I enjoy and not the one I do out of duty - because my kids are young. Whining about menopause is not on my horizon and I am 46. Everyone's clock is not the same, bozo.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:21 PM

Moxiemom

"I personally decided that it was about finding a balance between how much extra weight I'm comfortable carrying, how much I want to work out and how much of my time I'd like to spend on other things."

In other words, you are a fattie SAHM.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:21 PM

I'm counting on the heat from those hot flashes to burn excess muffin calories!

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 2:22 PM

"In other words, you are a fattie SAHM"

Isaiah, I told you to stay away from my friends.

Posted by: Patrick Dempsey | June 20, 2007 2:25 PM

Unless you walk, drive/ride a vehicle with no AC and a long commute, workout at lunch and don't take a good shower, or cycle to work, I just don't see the need for an office worker to need a shower prior to going out to eat. I'll wash the exposed areas and change clothes, but take another shower just because I've been awake for 12 hours? No need.

And as for the crotch smelling commenter, uhhh, I'm not expecting that many people to be getting that close to me, I do change clothes and wash, and if they did get that close I'd think by then my personal scent would no longer be a hindrance...

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 2:26 PM

You know, you can be drastically affected by menopause.

My mother will be 60 soon, and yes, the hot flashes took her normally 120 pound body all the way down to 105. She's a size 2 and I'm afraid to give her a good hug, I feel as though she'll snap like a twig.

I may feel like a big sturdy farm girl when I stand next to her, but at least I'm not in the early stages of osteoporosis. Poor mom. Now she has to take prevarin (or something like that) to prevent further bone loss.

Posted by: Maryland Mother | June 20, 2007 2:26 PM

JOHN L., I guess it boils down to preference. I can't imagine being in 100 degree heat and heavy humidity all day and not showering. I always shower before going out and putting on clean clothes. Getting a rep for being stinky is not something I want to chance. ;)

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 2:29 PM

Heavier women are less prone to osteoporosis. Just regular walking is a weight-bearing exercise.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:29 PM

I let go of the never ending battle to get rid of celluite when I noticed that my newborn daughter had dimples in her cute little butt.

Posted by: Nutty Mama | June 20, 2007 2:30 PM

Thank you so much for your words of wisdom on training for and running a Marathon, Meesh, Arlington Dad, Stacey, May, Dai and Stroller Mama! I really appreciate it.

Also, I am so totally skeptical of whoever it was who said they have a 20 inch waist. I'm pretty sure that person either doesn't know what they're talking about or is one of those sub-zero size women. If the first case, get a tape measure; if the second, go eat a sandwich.

Posted by: WorkingMomX | June 20, 2007 2:32 PM

Do men obsess about their figures the way women do?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:34 PM

San Diego mama,
I just came back from the doctor's office wehere I had to do the 3 hour gestational diabetes test. (failed the first "easy" test.) I didn't have it the first pregnancy and I am surprized that i might have it this time. I'm very surprized that someone as atheltic as you are got it--weren't you saying earlier that you were working out six times a day for 90 minutes?

anyway, thank you so much for sharing your story-- I had made lots of assumptions about who got gestational diabetes and was even tempted to just not take the tests because it didn't seem plausable that I would have it.

You've made me very happy that I decided to take it seriously! I'll get my results back next Tuesday and in the meanwhile plan to cut back on sugars, just in case (that's what diabetics do right?)

Posted by: Jen S. | June 20, 2007 2:34 PM

"I sweat like it's nobody's business and even if I were able to jump in the shower, I wouldn't have the time to dry my hair. And I HAVE to wash my hair after a workout b/c my scalp gets so sweaty. What's the secret?"

Posted by: Arlington, VA | June 20, 2007 01:14 PM

Horses sweat. Men perspire. Ladies glow.

Posted by: Matt in Aberdeen | June 20, 2007 2:35 PM

John L

Smell your body and your clothes! Smell your feet!

PLEASE!!!!!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:36 PM

Once again the collective intelligence of the presumed "Ivy League" graduates is on full display here writing about such commonplace and vulgar activities. Talking about midnight muffin munching is funny. Talking crudely about personal hygiene and sexual activities is, is, is crude!

(And, no, I don't believe the 20" waist either!)

Posted by: Comment Counter | June 20, 2007 2:39 PM

"Mr Bee only showers every 2-3 days when not working out,"

Yikes! No blow jobs for Mr. Bee! Don't guys smell their privates between showers?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 2:40 PM

"Talking about midnight muffin munching is funny."

And so is talking about midnight carpet munching.

Chill out, fatso.

Posted by: Rosie | June 20, 2007 2:44 PM

just curious:

My schedule is: wake up at 6.30, chores & breakfast, leave the house at 7.50 to be at work for 8.30 (walking). No lunch as I either have meetings or eat at my desk. Leave the office at 6.30 or 7 most nights, but leave early once or twice a week to make my 6-8 workout class. After dinner, 2 nights a week are spent on my self-employment project, 1 with friends, and 1 on chores/bills. In bed around 1am most nights.

Weekends, almost always out of town visiting family (bringing jogging shoes etc). When in town, home renovation & larger chores.

No, I have no idea how people with kids do it!

Posted by: worker bee | June 20, 2007 2:45 PM

In other words, you are a fattie SAHM"

Isaiah, I told you to stay away from my friends.

This is funny. I say quote of the day.

Posted by: scarry | June 20, 2007 2:47 PM

I got the impression that the 20-inch-waist poster was being facetious. I laughed (elasticity runs in the family?!), because NOBODY is that skinny!

If she's for real, I think she needs to be subject to a reverse liposuction. I volunteer to donate the fat.

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 2:52 PM

LOL, educmom. I'll sign up to donate some fat to the 20-inch waist, too. I'm very altruistic that way.

Posted by: WorkingMomX | June 20, 2007 2:55 PM

I think one of our anonymous posters has a obsessive/compulsive disorder based on odors and bathing.

Patrick,

If I were in 100 degree heat and high humidity all day, you're darn right I'd be showering before going out!

However, being in an AC, climate controlled building all day negates what the temp and humidity is outdoors, and although the car may be hot initially, it's hard to get really sweaty with both AC and just a 12 minute long commute home.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 2:55 PM

Thanks to all who have provided helpful comments.

Posted by: just curious | June 20, 2007 3:00 PM

John L

Smell your body and your clothes! Smell your feet!

PLEASE!!!!!


Posted by: | June 20, 2007 02:36 PM

I suspect Mrs. John L is just fine with how John L smells. Why ever would you have an opinion, 2:36?

PLEASE!!!!! get some counseling to deal with this over-bearing obsession.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 3:08 PM

Also, I am so totally skeptical of whoever it was who said they have a 20 inch waist. I'm pretty sure that person either doesn't know what they're talking about or

This makes me laugh. The number of people who advertise their horse as being 15.2 hh, when in reality the critter is only 14.3 hh makes me wonder how many people have actually USED a tape measure or a measuring stick properly.

Mind you, I think many a 14.3 hh is plenty appropriate for a lot of reasonably tall people, if the critter is well-sprung. People get too caught up in their height without looking at the entire horse. Or pony.

And yes, there is a slightly off-colour joke that would work here, but I don't wish to offend the sensitive.

Posted by: Maryland Mother | June 20, 2007 3:12 PM

LOL, educmom. I'll sign up to donate some fat to the 20-inch waist, too. I'm very altruistic that way.

Posted by: WorkingMomX

Ooh, ooh, me! Me! I can be altruistic too!

Posted by: Maryland Mother | June 20, 2007 3:14 PM

Maryland Mother,

That offcolor joke wouldn't, perchance, involve the phrase "why can't women estimate distances/lengths", does it?

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 3:15 PM

"My schedule is: wake up at 6.30, chores & breakfast, leave the house at 7.50 .... In bed around 1am most nights."

Whoa, Worker Bee. You truly are a worker bee!! Aren't you tired on so little sleep? I would be a walking zombie on that kind of schedule. If I am not in bed by 10:00 pm, I can hardly wake up at 6:00 AM. How do you keep up?

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 3:21 PM

Maryland Mother,

That offcolor joke wouldn't, perchance, involve the phrase "why can't women estimate distances/lengths", does it?

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 03:15 PM

It's an oldie, but a goodie!

Posted by: Maryland Mother | June 20, 2007 3:23 PM

"(And, no, I don't believe the 20" waist either!)"

I don't believe it, but it's possible. When I was in HS, my 12th-grade history teacher was talking about corsets and 18" waists, and said to the class that he thought I was the only one capable of achieving a natural 18" waist (I do not know what possessed him to think this would be a polite thing to say to a group of 17- and 18-year-olds, but in truth, I was a scrawny little booger). That comment was a very bad idea. I got it in my head that I was going to achieve this freak-of-nature goal, and managed to get down to 20.5." Unfortunately, I already had anorexia nervosa, and this "goal" did not help the situation.

So it is possible. But I highly doubt it is natural, even for the original poster, and I'm quite certain it's unhealthy.

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 3:24 PM

I just heard that two guys were in a road rage accident here. Guy 1 thought Guy 2 was going too slow, so he raced around him and slammed on the brakes and caused an accident. The four year old boy who was in the car with Guy 2 was not buckled in and was thrown and killed. Guy 2 was the boyfriend of the boy's mother. How do any of them look the mother in the eye or live with themeselves? Irresponsible people do so much damage in the world. Sad.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 3:25 PM

oh mona...

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 3:26 PM

The 20 inch waist does seem too small. Before my son, I was quite proud of my 27 inch waist. It is a thing of the past now.

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 3:26 PM

MdMom,

I figured that was the joke; it's one of my wife's favorites (also in the engineering field).

For those who don't know the joke:

"Why do women have such trouble estimating distances/lengths?"

"Because they are told for most of their lives that this (hold fingers about 3" apart) is 6" long."

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 3:27 PM

Isn't it wonderful the way the internet brings out our most generous instincts?

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 3:27 PM

I've never been a big sleeper--never napped as a kid, always read under the covers by flashlight, and used to work nightshifts to support myself in college.

That, and I drink a lot of coffee!

Posted by: worker bee | June 20, 2007 3:28 PM

John L:
LOL!!

Posted by: educmom | June 20, 2007 3:29 PM

"oh mona...

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 03:26 PM"

What? You've got more jokes? Go ahead. After 13 years of it, I think I've been through much worse than you can dish out. Have yourself a nice laugh. I'm really not that worried about it.

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 3:29 PM

"Because they are told for most of their lives that this (hold fingers about 3" apart) is 6" long."

Is that the reason all women think they they have small feet? a la Al Bundy?

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 3:30 PM

" just heard that two guys were in a road rage accident here. Guy 1 thought Guy 2 was going too slow, so he raced around him and slammed on the brakes and caused an accident"

Why are people such incredible idiots? We had a similar accident around here a few months ago. A couple of cars were apparently engaged in a road rage incident that went on for a few miles. One of the cars pulled in front of the other and slammed on its breaks. The other car veered off the road and the passengers were killed. I don't think they ever found the person who slammed on the brakes. What an incredible waste of energy and life.

My heart breaks for that little boy and his mother.

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 3:31 PM

I just heard that two guys were in a road rage accident here. Guy 1 thought Guy 2 was going too slow, so he raced around him and slammed on the brakes and caused an accident. The four year old boy who was in the car with Guy 2 was not buckled in and was thrown and killed. Guy 2 was the boyfriend of the boy's mother. How do any of them look the mother in the eye or live with themeselves? Irresponsible people do so much damage in the world. Sad.

Posted by: pATRICK

That is sad. Didn't the boyfriend know to put that kid in a car seat and buckle him up? How do people miss this after all these years and so much ink & PSA's?

Poor mom (and dad? Is he still in the land of the living?). Poor boy.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 3:34 PM

"Is that the reason all women think they they have small feet?"

FSVO "all", obviously.

If you want your wife to admit to having large feet, do what my husband did: opine that women with large feet are better in bed.

Posted by: Size 10 here | June 20, 2007 3:36 PM

On the road rage - Guy 1 was an idoit, Guy 2 was irresponsible - letting a four yr-old ride in a car not buckled in either a carseat or booster (depending on size). Parents take this as a reminder buckle the kids in!

Posted by: Divorced mom of 1 | June 20, 2007 3:36 PM

In other words, you are a fattie SAHM.

Posted by: | June 20, 2007 02:21 PM

Maybe I am and maybe I'm not, but Patrick Dempsey is my boyfriend!

Posted by: Moxiemom | June 20, 2007 3:38 PM

How sad. We are supposed to be the guardians of children, keep them safe and teach them to grow up strong and healthy...yet some have difficulty performing the most basic tasks...such as using child safety restraints. Not that any amount of finger-pointing could help the situation...imagine how terrible the boyfriend (and Guy 1) are going to (and should) feel...

Posted by: Mona | June 20, 2007 3:40 PM

Being female and 5'11" I would have been considered a freak of nature back in the time of the 18" waists. Don't think that even many of the men were that tall back then.

Here's to tall parents and superior nutrition! We are all bigger all over than they were back then.

Posted by: Re: 18" waists | June 20, 2007 3:40 PM

"That is sad. Didn't the boyfriend know to put that kid in a car seat and buckle him up? How do people miss this after all these years and so much ink & PSA's?

Poor mom (and dad? Is he still in the land of the living?). Poor boy."

They gave Guy 2 a felony endangerment charge for not buckling him in. I think it boils down to a hardcore group of human beings that are, at their core, irresponsible idiots and will never change.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 3:41 PM

Down here in NC, the big issue in the news lately has been the charging of adults for giving underage teens alcohol at parties.

At one of these parties the woman, I believe mother of one of the teens, got beer and alcohol for the kids, and a couple of them died leaving the party in a car crash. I don't recall what she was charged with, but it was a felony and she wasn't the only one I remember hearing about.

That's got to be one of the most stupid and irresponsible acts I've ever heard of an adult doing, especially a parent of teenagers at that very party! It makes me wonder how she will ever be able to meet the eyes of those dead kids' parents now.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 3:43 PM

or look at herself in the mirror

Posted by: mountainS | June 20, 2007 3:44 PM

Maybe someone should have subjected that guy to a little but of Texas mob justice:

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/us/AP-Crash-Assault.html?_r=2&oref=slogin&oref=slogin

Posted by: Meesh | June 20, 2007 3:50 PM

I have teens and know many parents who say that they would rather have the kids home drinking than out drinking. The adults don't necessarily provide the alcohol, but they collect car keys so the kids can't leave and have them all spend the night.

Still illegal, still wrong. My daughter hates that we're so strict about this. Maybe some day she'll forgive us. If not, at least we have a clear conscience.

Posted by: Amazing | June 20, 2007 3:51 PM

when I graduated from college in NM at 22, my dad bought a keg for my party. He also confiscated keys for everyone that showed up - most 21 or older, a few younger, all over 19 (dribking age in Texas at the time which was only 45 minutes away).

my dad had all my friends intimidated a bit,(which amused him excessively) no one even tried to leave who wasn't perfectly sober.

Big difference between that and 17 year olds though...

Posted by: Robin L. | June 20, 2007 3:53 PM

"I have teens and know many parents who say that they would rather have the kids home drinking than out drinking. The adults don't necessarily provide the alcohol, but they collect car keys so the kids can't leave and have them all spend the night.

Still illegal, still wrong. My daughter hates that we're so strict about this. Maybe some day she'll forgive us. If not, at least we have a clear conscience."

This is still STUPID. What if YOU haven't collected all the keys? Can you imagine the enormous legal liability these idiots take on. I would NEVER allow my kids to do this and I would not be friends with someone who did this.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 3:55 PM

"Big difference between that and 17 year olds though..."

If the legal drinking age is 21, and the guests are 20 years 11 months, it's still illegal. I won't be responsible for that in my house.

The drinking age 45 minutes away doesn't matter either, it's the age where you are that counts.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 3:56 PM

When I was in high school, I remember quite a few parents who let their 17 and 18 year olds have beer at parties. Back then, the drinking age in DC was 18 (for beer and wine), but of course, some kids at these parties were 17. And in hindsight, these parents weren't really what one would consider irresponsible types. I think people were just more relaxed back then. Even in college, where the drinking age was 21, we had parties where there was beer and sometimes even hard stuff. I have a vague recollection of a white and black russian party in my freshman dorm.

I am not justifying any of the parents here. But times do seem to have changed, and I do think that nowadays, we rightly take the drinking age more seriously.

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 3:59 PM

pATRICK,

I'm not sure if you understood me.

"Still illegal, still wrong. My daughter hates that we're so strict about this. Maybe some day she'll forgive us. If not, at least we have a clear conscience."

We are strict about not allowing her to attend these parties, and we do not allow them in our home.

I know one girl who asked her mother if she could have a party - said there would be no drinking and the mother could collect keys. The mother replied that there would be no party because "Why should I even consider collecting keys if there is going to be no drinking - you must be planning something."

Posted by: Amazing | June 20, 2007 4:00 PM

You could collect all the keys and still have a problem. What about alcohol poisoning? What if there was a fire - how would you feel if teens were killed in your home because they didn't get out due to a drunken stupor?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 4:03 PM

I drank in high school, so I certainly was no saint. I even went to one of these parties. Many of the kids, including me did not have parental permission to be there. Some kids were enormously drunk, I think if their parents say them, they would have had a fit. The taking of the keys was a joke, kids rolled in and out. We are lucky no one was killed in a crash. My girlfriends dad was the one who threw the party.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 4:03 PM

Just because some parents collect keys means they end up with ALL the keys. Duplicates are readily available, or other teens who don't come inside for the party could lend someone their car.

In this case, though, none of this was done, the mom just provided the drinks and let the kids leave without any kind of oversight. Those of you down here in Raleigh should have seen the stories on this incident; I think the kids went to the Wakefield HS here in North Raleigh.

Posted by: John L | June 20, 2007 4:07 PM

My sisters and I were talking about how much some people drank in high school, and how much the parents drank. We would go to parties and everyone was drinking -- parents, kids, everyone. The parents seemed to accept it as a normal part of growing up. There were 4 seniors who were killed in my school in one car when I was in 8th grade, so everyone was afraid to drive drunk (believe me, there was a LOT of emphasis on not doing that after all those kids died).

I know for a fact that my stepdaughter got hold of a bunch of liquor and drank herself into oblivion with about a dozen friends at our house the weekend after graduation (we were in the process of moving, and she had about a 30-hour window, and used it). We didn't find out until a few weeks later when a former neighbor made a comment. Luckily, they all crashed at our house and no one drove, but we grounded her anyway for a month. Stupid is as stupid does.

Posted by: WorkingMomX | June 20, 2007 4:07 PM

Talking about stupid teenager stunts -
A few years back, my boss hired a teenaged neighbor to feed his cats and walk his dog while he was out of town for a few days. When he returned, he discovered that the kid had thrown a party in his (very nice) house and had not cleaned up very well (apparently). He found clues that the kids were drinking there also. He was livid, but the damage was already done. Luckily, no one was killed. I wonder if he could be held liable for this if something had happened.

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 4:17 PM

Emily -- Did he tell the kid's parents what happened?

Posted by: Arlington Dad | June 20, 2007 4:21 PM

These memories have definitely shaped me as a parent. My wife was a goody two shoes who never got in any trouble. I feel strangely thankful, because I know many of the tricks of the trade that teenagers will pull.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 4:24 PM

But times do seem to have changed, and I do think that nowadays, we rightly take the drinking age more seriously.

=======

I totally agree with this. Colleges and adjacent towns are taking enforcement of alcohol violations much more seriously now than when I was in college. Friends of my college-age kids have gotten into legal trouble with underage drinking violations. I am glad to see the stepped up enforcement.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 4:27 PM

"Emily -- Did he tell the kid's parents what happened?"

Oh yes. In fact, he warned the whole neighborhood. This kid apparently had a few other pet feeding/walking gigs with other neighbors as well.

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 4:29 PM

DS just completed first year of college. Drinking was rampant. There may be more enforcement of drinking regulations now than ever before, but that's not saying very much.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 4:34 PM

"These memories have definitely shaped me as a parent."

These memories scare me a little (ok, a lot). Because my parents were pretty square, and I was not allowed to do much, and still did a lot of stuff I shouldn't have and that was potentially dangerous (mostly by lying to them and managing never to get caught or in trouble). I was, on the face of it, such a good kid that they just trusted me. I got good grades, I behaved mostly like a human being, I had a job, saved my money, all that kind of thing. So I am terrified of my son's teenage years. What dangerous things will he do that I won't be able to prevent him from doing?

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 4:38 PM

"When I was in high school, I remember quite a few parents who let their 17 and 18 year olds have beer at parties."

Posted by: Emily | June 20, 2007 03:59 PM

When I was in high school, I went to plenty of parties at friends' apartments. The definition of "party" was when people got together to enjoy one another's company. Maybe the people at our school were not in the mainstream, because the mainstream definition of "party" seems to exclude a get-together without alcohol, and there was no alcohol at our high school parties. Is this true in Atlanta as well as DC?

"My sisters and I were talking about how much some people drank in high school, and how much the parents drank. We would go to parties and everyone was drinking -- parents, kids, everyone."

Posted by: WorkingMomX | June 20, 2007 04:07 PM

Yeah. If the parents are juicers, why the surprise if their children are juicers? And if the parents are potheads, why the surprise if their children are potheads?

Posted by: Matt in Aberdeen | June 20, 2007 4:41 PM

EMILY, they scare me too because I remember all the dumba$$ things I did and kids can find themselves in a jam in a hurry. W e just drank, now there is black tar heroin and cheese out there.

Posted by: pATRICK | June 20, 2007 4:43 PM

One of the best ways to get yourself outside and exercising on a regular basis is to get a dog! Ever since I got my dog five years ago, I've done 2 or 3 walks (10 to 15 minutes each) with him every day, and I've lost 15 pounds (which is a lot for someone as small as me). A dog gives you the extra motivation and the consistency you need in exercise. I do it for myself as much as I do it for him now. You'd be hard pressed to find a better exercise buddy than your canine friend! By the way, I don't have to get up at an ungodly hour to fit this in. And I'm a bit puzzled at the earlier comments about 1 hour of exercise per week leading to a heart attack. Isn't any amount of exercise good for you, as long as you don't push too hard and over-exert yourself?

Posted by: LS | June 20, 2007 4:45 PM

Jen S.~

I felt the same way you did with my GD diagnosis! I thought GD was a result of poor diet and lack of exercise. And I have no family history of diabetes, so I just didn't understand. It turns out that anyone can get it, and is related to how your body responds to pregnancy. Other factors don't help, but you can get GD even if you live a "healthy" lifestyle.

But, the upside in your case is that tons of people fail the 1st test, and pass the second one just fine. But if you do have GD, it's not horrible to manage. Just eat right and exercise, which you should do anyway. Avoid sugars and processed carbs. If you do have GD, they'll give you a specific plan to follow, but it's really not too bad.

Good luck!!!

Posted by: San Diego Mama | June 20, 2007 4:45 PM

Personally, I think that the legal drinking age of 21 is rediculous. You can die for your country, sign legally binding contracts, be put to death if convicted of capital offense at the age of 18. You can be charged as an adult for many things at the age of 12. But you can't legally drink until you're 21.

That said, the law is the law and if you, as a parent, are stupid enough to provide booze to underage adults, you deserve what you get.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 20, 2007 4:57 PM

Anyone else remember California when personal quantities of many recreational drugs were allowed (mid to late 70s)? No drinking until 21 though.

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 5:09 PM

Jen S - I also had GD with my first pregnancy (although not with the subsequent two which is unexpected) but knowing about it early allowed me to manage it with diet and exercise. I agree with San Diego mom - limit sugar and processed carbs but also read all labels - there is sugar lurking in very unexpected places. Salad dressing is full of corn syrup (which seems to be in practically everything). There's even sugar in many canned vegetables (which are not good anyway, but I was still surprised to see sugar in there). Once the blood sugar levels were under control, I felt much better and the bouts of lightheadedness that I'd had disappeared too. Good luck!

Posted by: Stacey | June 20, 2007 5:24 PM

To just curious: cause both dh and I need to get up and out in the am to get to work and if I'm not there, he has more than double the work.

However , if the au pair is there then 1) there are still two sets of hands to help with the kids. And 2) we can incorporate it into her hours.

Posted by: atlmom | June 20, 2007 5:38 PM

atlmom - enjoy Disney...I found free music outside of the House of Blues. Good music too. Went until about 10:30 or so...check it out!

Posted by: dotted | June 20, 2007 5:45 PM

jxqfrginu deai uxebmg czrj cywlt guxz vuptxwsnj

Posted by: tlods oihyd | July 6, 2007 11:33 PM

wksta hkodjxcl upzdtqe zfqlxa abfncqdri ezjkn jrnv http://www.gcmqrwx.piuvsj.com

Posted by: cdope yekd | July 6, 2007 11:35 PM

wksta hkodjxcl upzdtqe zfqlxa abfncqdri ezjkn jrnv http://www.gcmqrwx.piuvsj.com

Posted by: cdope yekd | July 6, 2007 11:36 PM

wksta hkodjxcl upzdtqe zfqlxa abfncqdri ezjkn jrnv http://www.gcmqrwx.piuvsj.com

Posted by: cdope yekd | July 6, 2007 11:37 PM

ixwu uxtp nayol bytgjlnc wjmuifedh prfl jsaguo fgmoiwj bstc

Posted by: capsi cxqib | July 6, 2007 11:39 PM

ixwu uxtp nayol bytgjlnc wjmuifedh prfl jsaguo fgmoiwj bstc

Posted by: capsi cxqib | July 6, 2007 11:40 PM

ixwu uxtp nayol bytgjlnc wjmuifedh prfl jsaguo fgmoiwj bstc

Posted by: capsi cxqib | July 6, 2007 11:41 PM

qmlgyb onktbrch pwbkjs taewbjlk rgvdtj vgnqadhy bcinw [URL]http://www.sxzegviuk.mkexo.com[/URL] ldrmb taqf

Posted by: owdvut zmoa | July 6, 2007 11:43 PM

wokfdhpvl kxgsdwc qxbmtp rheztkgu szvcjaie eihgfjkyp bmtr [URL=http://www.igyrbewlu.dzkenywo.com]ajtyoh ksxginlp[/URL]

Posted by: lwcrfij ndji | July 6, 2007 11:43 PM

qmlgyb onktbrch pwbkjs taewbjlk rgvdtj vgnqadhy bcinw [URL]http://www.sxzegviuk.mkexo.com[/URL] ldrmb taqf

Posted by: owdvut zmoa | July 6, 2007 11:44 PM

qmlgyb onktbrch pwbkjs taewbjlk rgvdtj vgnqadhy bcinw [URL]http://www.sxzegviuk.mkexo.com[/URL] ldrmb taqf

Posted by: owdvut zmoa | July 6, 2007 11:45 PM

qmlgyb onktbrch pwbkjs taewbjlk rgvdtj vgnqadhy bcinw [URL]http://www.sxzegviuk.mkexo.com[/URL] ldrmb taqf

Posted by: owdvut zmoa | July 6, 2007 11:46 PM

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 

© 2007 The Washington Post Company