And to think of all the people in this country who have survived "bad" toys and other items in their lifetime. Such as riding bicycles without helmets and/or safety features wit only occassional spills and knicked up knees and elbows, , played with wooden blocks with painted numbers on them, played marbles without swallowing them, rode in car seats and arrived at their destination in one piece, played in cribs and play pens without injury. And, for that matter, played with other children during their lifetimes, including evening and night sessions of Red Rover, hide and seek, and (heaven forbid) "war" with fake guns. (In those days, you could play with fake guns, unlike today when fake guns are discouraged but real guns are encouraged.)

And what were children told? "Be careful. Watch what you're doing. Don't poke your eyes out." And we survived. Amazing, isn't it.

Dungarees@gmail.com

or just say no to toys that are "Made in China"

To be honest, so much is being recalled today. I wouldn't sweat it. If your worried, send a nice book or art supplies. I really don't know why you should feel that bad about this stuff. Just about everything has been recalled or about to be recalled. And I think if you check every day you will make yourself nuts. Get the emails, and get rid of recalled toys but beyond it don't sweat it. BTW, not just plastic has been recalled. Those wooden Thomas the Train toys were recalled for lead paint too.

I think that Jim was out of line. The toy hadn't been recalled yet when you gave it to them, and they should have been grateful that you reacted so quickly to the recall notice.

Dungarees is right. I can guarantee you the toys i played with in the 60's and 70's make today's recalled toys look super safe.

Oh, get a grip! This is not the end of the world. You found out the toy was recalled. You told the parents. Move on.

Jim is a tool. If he thinks you should have known better, why shouldn't he have as well? And way to go, announcing it in front of other people like a 15-year-old.

I think I would lose those "friends". Jim sounds like a real a**hole. If I were you, I would NOT replace the gift and would not give any others in the future. When little Hannah is older, tell her that you don't give her presents because her daddy makes you feel bad when you do. Why do you CARE if Carolyn and Jim are still speaking to you? Geez!!!

fr the article:

>...Before I could say, "Doh," he wagged a finger at me. "You're supposed to know about this stuff...

WHAT a jerk. For his birthday, I suggest a book on kindergarten manners.

Dungarees, please google (or read about) survivor bias. We didn't use car seats, or seat belts, and our parents drove drunk, and we ingested lead, and we're all fine. What about the kids who didn't make it?

"And we survived."

Well, obviously. If we hadn't, we wouldn't be the ones talking about it, would we? Those who didn't survive riding bikes without helmets or cars without carseats are hardly around to discuss it on chatboards.

FTR, Jim sounds like a jerk to me, too.

We were able to avoid the china problem this Christmas but Webkins wreaked havoc during our holiday: the website crashed and our kids, who received their first Webkinz for Christmas this year, were unable to logon for days. When they were finally able to logon, they were unable to access their rooms. When they finally were able to access the rooms they got bumped out of the site if they accessed their rooms more than once during a session. It seems as though Webkins is having an IT nightmare. Second only to the Christmas afternoon nightmare that the kids experienced.

Dungarees' comment is very annoying and I am tired of people saying stuff like that. Maybe he/she doesn't know anyone who got seriously injured from a "bad" carseat or lack of bike helmet. Or perhaps no one he/she knows has had high levels of lead from "bad" toys. It happens all the time and our society has evolved because of it. New rules and guidelines are developed for a reason. If enough people have gotten hurt from poorly designed items, they need to be fixed. I personally know 3 small children who have had high lead levels from everyday objects in their houses. Luckily the parents found out in time and the kids are on medicine. And the contaminated items have been removed from the home. Does Dungarees know that being exposed to high levels of lead for a long time cause SEVERE learning problems? And does he/she know that 100s of kids have died from swallowing marbles and other small toys. Oh and guess what? The SIDS rate has gone down now that we are all encouraged to put kids to sleep on their backs.

So sure, Dungarees and all of us reading this survived, but many children did not and many won't if parents let them play with choking hazards and don't install carseats properly.

I certainly would not take it personally. You did the best that you could. In fact, you immediately contacted the family when you learned of the hazard. Joking aside, the father was not very nice in this situation. You acted wonderfully

Congratulations for being a concerned & loving friend.

I think Jim sounds like a hoot. Can none of you take a joke??

And can someone tell me how a set of blocks with letters on them can be "award-winning?" It cracks me up how people fall for the marketing crud out there that touts anything that has letters or numbers on it as "educational, you need this!!" A one year old just wants something to stack up and knock down. She doesn't care if there are letters or Chinese characters or porn on them.

We were able to avoid the china problem this Christmas but Webkins wreaked havoc during our holiday: the website crashed and our kids, who received their first Webkinz for Christmas this year, were unable to logon for days. When they were finally able to logon, they were unable to access their rooms. When they finally were able to access the rooms they got bumped out of the site if they accessed their rooms more than once during a session. It seems as though Webkins is having an IT nightmare. Second only to the Christmas afternoon nightmare that the kids experienced.

Posted by: Laura | January 2, 2008 10:11 AM

A tear...

Lead exposure is extremely serious. Lead, in trace amounts, is in all sorts of stuff. As we take down our trees and other Christmas decorations please don't forget to WASH YOUR HANDS before doing anything else.

Lead paint in toys and choking hazzards are serious issues for anyone with a toddler. Toddlers rely on their parents to protect them.

As for older kids, you can be sure they're not thinking about the permanent damage a serious head injury can do. That's your job as a parent. If it moves and your kid is on it, he or she should be wearing a helmet.

No, you can't prevent every little accident, but if you can prevent a serious permanent injury wouldn't you want to?

I'd rather have Dungarees raise my kids than some of your other yahoos. By the way, who keeps track of recalled toys?

Wow, mountain out of a molehill.

I will add this to my already long list of reasons why we always give books as birthday presents.

"Does Dungarees know that being exposed to high levels of lead for a long time cause SEVERE learning problems?"

Even more than that- hasn't anyone else seen all the recent studies linking the dramatic decline in violent crime during the 90s with the removal of lead from gasoline during the 70s? Many scientists think the crime levels went up in the first place because of the prevalence of lead, which causes all kinds of mental problems (including reduced impulse control). I think 60 minutes did a piece on this a few months ago...

At any rate, I was discussing this issue with my inlaws sometime back, and their view was that the added safety measures for kids were a great idea. Kids used to die at young ages all the time from things that are less and less common now. I happen to think this is a good thing.

Still not sure why Dungarees thinks bike helmets are a bad thing. I know several adults who took falls that would probably have killed them without helmets.

I'm with Dungaree. (Is anyone familiar with Bag O' Glass from SNL? Everytime I hear toy recall I think of that sketch. Classic...)

I'm all for monitoring lead levels in toys but there's only so much that I, as a busy working mother, can do. I have to trust that the government (CPSC) and the companies are doing their best to maintain standards that are in line with science and appropriate oversight. As for the toys that pose choking and other physical hazards, parents should be supervising their children's play at all times anyway.

Without having done any research, majority of harmful toys (and products) are probably sold in dollar stores that are patronized by customers who probably aren't even aware of potential safety issues.

If you're really worried, I guess stick to the mainstream stuff that has probably been bought by hundreds of thousands of consumers where any hazards would have surfaced by now.

I agree with previous posters that Jim sounds like a complete jerk. I'd use this opportunity to end the friendship. But Annys, you also need to be a little less of a doormat. You allowed these people to make you feel very guilty and to label yourself as a bad person, for something that was completely out of your control. These are NOT friends.

OMG - lighten up, smartcookie. It. Was. A. Joke. Not a reason to end a friendship. You probably go to sleep at night thinking "wow, I am such a great person, I never feel guilty about anything, and I'm really smart....but I wonder why I have no friends?" Probably because you're so freaking high maintenance and end friendships for silly reasons.

Oh and another thing....Annys stated that she felt guilty about the recalled toy gift long before Jim made his joke, and she felt even worse when she found out that the company had remedied the issue by sending her a refund. He didn't make her feel bad - the situation did.

Jim is funny. Doesn't anyone else see the humor in a Cosumer Reporter giving a gift that turns out to be a recalled toy? (I took it that the author saw the humor and irony here). It's like a landscape architect with a dead lawn. Or a hairdresser who always has a bad hair day. The professional chef who feeds her kids casseroles made with mushroom soup.

why is this an issue, I don't know a single one of my son's friends who hasn't purchased a toy that was recalled. At least with us we only had one toy that was. My sister in law, who buys toys from mall toy stores, has had at least 5 recalls. The one I had was purchased at a "cool" toy store.

We have four children and don't own one recalled toy, nor have I ever bought one for another child. Seems to me you all are just buying too many toys.

To me, THE MAIN POINT of that comes from this exchange is that joking can be a form of assault. Not everyone may take your joke as a funny. Why be cruel when it is not necessary?

Annys did the best she could for the situation she found herself in. With "friends" like that who needs enemies?

To anonymous -- why did you feel the need to personally attack me over a difference of opinion? Is this how you handle all disagreements? Or were you just joking?

I wasn't joking. But I think it's sad that you would so quickly end a relationship over a simple joke. And it's ironic that someone who calls herself smartcookie would do something so shortsighted.