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Tell the Campaign in a Limerick

It's finally here. The day you've been waiting for. The day of the PostPartisan "Tell-the-Campaign-in-a-Limerick Contest."

The contest begins now and continues through 1 a.m. ET tomorrow (when voting ends in Alaska's Aleutian Islands). A winner will be announced Wednesday (barring need for a recount) and will get an original drawing by The Post's Pulitzer-winning political cartoonist Tom Toles.

So enter your limerick in the comments section. If you need a refresher on limericks, see here. Or see here:

By Editorial Page Editor Fred Hiatt:

Consider the amazing Joe Biden
Whose mouth can perpetually widen
When he said, "We'll be tested,"
Obama requested
That no one choose Joe to confide in.

By Tom Toles:

There once was a gal from Wasilla,
A supposedly half-ton gorilla.
But to this day
She's had nothing to say
Except to imply: "Vote vanilla."

By editorial intern Steven Stein:

Hickory dickory dock
The clock has struck 12 for Barack.
Let’s see if the fella’
Can stay Cinderella
And win this thing in a walk.

By columnist Kathleen Parker:

There once was a maiden of Wasilla,
Whose winks men described as a thrillah,
One glance at McCain
And the poor man was slain;
No one said it, but all thought Camilla.

By Marisa Katz  | November 4, 2008; 9:00 AM ET
Categories:  Contest  | Tags:  Marisa Katz  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: When Politics Is Funny
Next: Divine Electoral Intervention?

Comments

I would change "nothing" to "naught." I think it flows better.

Posted by: areddy1 | November 4, 2008 9:41 AM | Report abuse

There once was a Senator from Arizona
Who said to the country, "I'll own ya!"
But his judgment went failin"
And he picked Sarah Palin
And now he's a Senator from Arizona.

Posted by: tomdelay | November 4, 2008 9:41 AM | Report abuse

There once was a vegan named Tennyson
Who was given a plate full of venison
When he took his first bite
He exclaimed with delight
"Now this is a change I believe in."

Posted by: tomdelay | November 4, 2008 9:45 AM | Report abuse

I can think of no more than Obama
Who so sadly just lost his grandmamma
With support in each State
For which we all cannot wait
To end this sad 8 years of drama

Posted by: 1American2 | November 4, 2008 9:45 AM | Report abuse

A man once chose to interject
"I can't vote for Barack; I object!"
But then to his great shock,
Americans said: Barack
Obama for President, we select!

Posted by: omarlatiri | November 4, 2008 9:56 AM | Report abuse

The campaign's been a very long fight,
But now, finally, the end is in sight.
I just hope we can say,
At the end of the day,
That the issues were not black and white.

Posted by: PDVN | November 4, 2008 9:57 AM | Report abuse

Obama, McCain and old Nader
A winner, a loser, a fader
Biden stayed nice,
And Palin was spice
Now let's hope we have got past the nadir.

The trusty old pol named McCain
Tried to tell us he always spoke plain.
But he too tempted Fate
When his new running mate
Gave "L" to a terrible pain.

The election of two thousand eight
Will resound as a marvelous date
The whole thing was geared
To the totally weird
As a proof of an ironic Fate

Posted by: jhherring | November 4, 2008 10:08 AM | Report abuse

Barack - a new shade of Red?
A slightly Communist shade instead?
His plan for spreading the wealth -
is it Marxism gone stealth?
The American Dream - Sadly dead.

Posted by: VaVoter78 | November 4, 2008 10:12 AM | Report abuse

Hillary’s Bill for Barack:
“Obama’ll take D.C. back!”
But when subtext you delve
It’s two thousand twelve
As they plot distaff Clinton’s come-back!

Posted by: ChacoWhacko | November 4, 2008 10:21 AM | Report abuse

Sorry; Hilary not Hillary - thus:

Hilary’s Bill for Barack:
“Obama’ll take D.C. back!”
But when subtext you delve
It’s two thousand twelve
As they plot distaff Clinton’s come-back!

Posted by: ChacoWhacko | November 4, 2008 10:32 AM | Report abuse

The Campaign to Nowhere:

John McCain has no brain
And Sarah's not much better
They tossed their dirt
Flashed some skirt
And went Nowhere together

Posted by: patrick3 | November 4, 2008 10:41 AM | Report abuse

There once was a mayor named Rudy
Who thought he was rather a shrewdie
By smearing his foe
With innuendo
He ended up smelling like doody

Posted by: drgerbils | November 4, 2008 10:42 AM | Report abuse

Dear John, you so wanted to woo me,
And dear Sarah, well, we hardly knew ye;
In the fridge there's a beer
But friends, we're out of here.
Signed, Obama and Biden, yours truly.

Posted by: mgm3 | November 4, 2008 10:45 AM | Report abuse

There once was a man named McCain,
whose chances went right down the drain.
Despite his grim smile,
he missed by a mile,
and ran a campaign that was lame.

Posted by: wordly1 | November 4, 2008 10:48 AM | Report abuse

it was Sarah's dazzling dress
That crazed the public and the press!
She looked so chick
But they called her a wrong pick
And John's numbers did regress!

Posted by: Gururaj21 | November 4, 2008 10:48 AM | Report abuse

The republicans went on to produce
A VP with a shapely caboose
But at the end of the day
I can honestly say
I would rather vote for a moose.

Posted by: Lscherer | November 4, 2008 10:58 AM | Report abuse

Election '08 is completed.
Historic vote records exceeded.
In chorus we hear Hosanna
for President-Elect Obama.
Or is it because campaign ads for now are deleted.

Posted by: EFLillge | November 4, 2008 10:59 AM | Report abuse

He started at the Dem's convention four years ago

He’s this guy named Obama who we didn’t know

His fabulous speech

His extensive outreach

Has vanquished all McBush-Palin politicos!

Posted by: jmmalvord | November 4, 2008 11:00 AM | Report abuse

There was a young Gov name of Palin,
whose words to the press were a-flailin'.
As she fought to sound focused
and work hocus-pocus,
her prospects were quickly derailin'.

Posted by: wordly1 | November 4, 2008 11:05 AM | Report abuse

At first the campaign of Obama
Was getting that scoundrel Osama
When Palin was picked by McCain
John's prospects went right down the drain
So for Barack, his election was no trauma

Posted by: lsturm | November 4, 2008 11:07 AM | Report abuse

As Obama's advantage got bigger
John called in an old-time vote-rigger
The one with the balls
To make these robocalls:
Saying "Now y'all don't vote for no colored person"

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:09 AM | Report abuse

The haters all came out in force
With the old Karl Rove playbook, of course
They said "We still might
"Bring up Reverend Wright"
Still flogging the same old dead horse

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:12 AM | Report abuse

There once was a small town mayor,
Who when criticized cried, "that's not fair!
My opponent is elite
And will bring us defeat
And pals around with terrorists like Bill Ayers!"

Posted by: lizziellen | November 4, 2008 11:13 AM | Report abuse

Tactics inpired by K Rove's brain got

Party hacks out in droves to campaign, what

Consequence not intended

The message they sent did

Make conservatives vote for McCain - NOT.

Posted by: adtecom1 | November 4, 2008 11:13 AM | Report abuse

More than once through the month of October
I reflected both drunk and quite sober
Forget John McCain
(Or that Palin pain)
For Shadow Senate seat, I'm voting OBER!

Posted by: pemortimer | November 4, 2008 11:14 AM | Report abuse

McCain's new best friend, Joe the Plumber
Is having his Indian Summer
He soon hopes to be
On a country CD
And probably driving a Hummer

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:16 AM | Report abuse

There once was a man named McCain
Who picked a VP so inane
That the voters all said
From states blue and states red
That the old man must now be insane

Posted by: progressivebulldog | November 4, 2008 11:18 AM | Report abuse

Obama has shown us his guile
By solving a crisis in style.
We don't need to drill,
It's all up in his grill -
The wattage of Joe Biden's smile


Posted by: jwanders | November 4, 2008 11:20 AM | Report abuse

Clerihews are also good:

Barack Obama
Proved to be quite the charmer
While the McCain campaign misdirected
He remained cool, calm and collected

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:20 AM | Report abuse

The ads this campaign have been wiley,
Invoking Paris and Britney and Miley.
But we the people know better,
Even in states that are redder,
Than to believe the likes of O'Reilly.

Posted by: lizziellen | November 4, 2008 11:23 AM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Barack
Who Republicans teamed up to mock.
Saying "Celebrity, Terrorist,
Muslim, Wealth 'Sharer-ist';
But to Obama the voters did flock.

Posted by: NMReader | November 4, 2008 11:24 AM | Report abuse

Our Nation is in a great tizzy,
Enough lies to make one quite dizzy.
With our country in trauma,
We all cried for Mama
But, thank God, was delivered Obama.

Posted by: warehousemanalive | November 4, 2008 11:24 AM | Report abuse

"Full coverage by our news team!"
"At 5pm Eastern!", they scream
I'll be watching with glee
On MSNBC
With Olberman, Matthews, and GENE!

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:24 AM | Report abuse

Obama: One candidate’s name.
The other, John McCain.
Americans in the voting booth
Find their way to the “truth”
And 4 years of exchanging blame.

Posted by: LeonaSpencer | November 4, 2008 11:26 AM | Report abuse

I thank you Sir John, Lady Cindy:
you brought out the Blue here in Indy.
For once we Dems matter:
your big dreams we'll shatter,
flown away like old Lucky Lindy.

Posted by: wordly1 | November 4, 2008 11:27 AM | Report abuse

punctuation corrected:

There once was a man named Barack
Who Republicans teamed up to mock.
Saying "Celebrity, Terrorist,
Muslim, Wealth 'Sharer-ist'"
But to Obama the voters did flock.

Posted by: NMReader | November 4, 2008 11:28 AM | Report abuse

Fox News: an example of misuse
Of airtime. Please pass me the tissues!
That idiot Hannity
Will question your sanity
Without ever raising the issues.

"Tissues!" - eur that was a bit weak!

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:33 AM | Report abuse

To the losers, a public deflation.
To the winner "Hey, congratulations.
Be proud. You won.
Hope your party had fun.
Now get to work fixing the nation."

Posted by: Squatty_HJ | November 4, 2008 11:35 AM | Report abuse

The Crunch and BO

Obama had a winning smile
And speeches that did much beguile.
But it was the CRUNCH
That stole McCain’s lunch
And sent O to DC in some style.

Posted by: Mary_Cunningham | November 4, 2008 11:38 AM | Report abuse

Sarah Palin has caused quite the mania,
You betcha, she'll out-campaign ya.
She's divided the states
Into Pro-America and fake,
But she won't get 1600 Pennsylvania!

Posted by: lizziellen | November 4, 2008 11:38 AM | Report abuse

Sarah Palin has caused quite the mania,
You betcha, she'll out-campaign ya.
The states she did take
Are Pro-America, not fake,
But she won't get 1600 Pennsylvania!

Posted by: lizziellen | November 4, 2008 11:40 AM | Report abuse

When his aids gave his veep choice a chill-a,
John McCain took the broad from Wasilla.
Could the campaign get dumber?
Yes: "My hero's a plumber!"
And now I'm exiled to Manila.

Posted by: HarryHaller | November 4, 2008 11:40 AM | Report abuse

There once was a gal from Alaska
Didn't like what the journalists aska
So she played to the base
And lied with a straight face
But the fancy clothes still couldn't maska

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 4, 2008 11:41 AM | Report abuse

The beauty queen of Wasilla
To some seemed only a silla'
She ran out of luck
As her mouth ran amuck
And exposed she was one with Attila.

Posted by: mriles | November 4, 2008 11:42 AM | Report abuse

No greater survivor there can surely be
than John McCain, Vietnam pilot and detainee
but even a veteran of crashes
couldn’t escape from the ashes
of the smoldering wreckage of Bush forty three

Posted by: engelmann | November 4, 2008 11:49 AM | Report abuse

I keep reworking this one...

Sarah Palin has caused quite the mania,
You betcha, she'll out-campaign ya.
Some Americans are "pro",
Others "fake", doncha know,
Lucky us "fakers" have 1600 Pennsylvania!

Posted by: lizziellen | November 4, 2008 12:03 PM | Report abuse

There once was a plumber called Joe
Who was called out one night in the snow,
But on old John McCain
Our Joe pulled the chain
And away all the votes they did flow.

Posted by: ItsAdo | November 4, 2008 12:08 PM | Report abuse

We all have a decision to make,
Between the genuine article or fake.
Whether your choice red or blue
You know what to do.
In a landslide Obama will take.

Posted by: cyano | November 4, 2008 12:09 PM | Report abuse

There once was a Republican block
Which no one could seem to unlock
Those 8 awful years
Increased all our fears
Thank heavens for that man Barack.

Posted by: sternab1 | November 4, 2008 12:14 PM | Report abuse

Barracudas you land with precision
Their dentition can cause a great scission
Mac-daddy thought “Hey!
Whose the bait anyway?”
Can a fish look forward to seisen?

Posted by: tectech | November 4, 2008 12:16 PM | Report abuse

For a thousand dollar check,
All my freedoms I reject,
To vote for the Marxist messiah,
The Illinois Pariah

Posted by: leapin | November 4, 2008 12:19 PM | Report abuse

With Red voters so tightly wound
at rallies racists abound
"We'll be taxed at great cost
and our country we've lost!"
but has in truth after 8 years been found

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

All the dems had been fretting
About voting fleece
When McCain chose a VP without vetting
All that did cease

Posted by: jak_gingko | November 4, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

It all comes down to to-day
Sarah Palin, Tina Fey
McCain with a cane
Biden, just a Dane
Obama a hope, a ray

Posted by: cantabb1 | November 4, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

This former Alaskan beauty queen
Thought she was sparkling clean
Katie took her down
Fey made her a clown
And she clumsily tripped onto the scene

Posted by: adamdavidcollins | November 4, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

hey Leapin, that's not a limerick.

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

An Irish-American mama
Said to her priest, "Father Thomma,
How can I choose
Twixt the reds and the blues?"
He quickly replied, "Vote O'Bama."

Posted by: DeanAlterman | November 4, 2008 12:23 PM | Report abuse

There once was a gal thumping her Bible
As she called to the reds, "Go Tribal!"
"We'll wag righteous fingers
At those immoral Left-wingers
While I help my eldest get bridal."

(sorry folks, limericks are supposed to be kinda dirty!)

Posted by: lindsayhowerton | November 4, 2008 12:24 PM | Report abuse

Today’s election is historic with little doubt
the pollsters’ predictions are all showing rout
if the polling is right
then maybe it might
let Bradley’s ghost find peace and stop coming out

Posted by: engelmann | November 4, 2008 12:24 PM | Report abuse

"2012"

The pulse on the monitor ceased,
A heroes' flag was creased,
The death of the Maverick
Brought us all havoc,
Sarah ripped our country to pieces.

Posted by: tsottek | November 4, 2008 12:26 PM | Report abuse

Saint Obama from Windy Chicago
Allied with Joe to deliver some drama
Maverick John and Airy Sarah
Will have new careers in 2009
And surely regret that Scary campaign
2008 will forever be great!

Posted by: michaelgduffy | November 4, 2008 12:29 PM | Report abuse

This election can be viewed as didactic
as the right-wingers' primary tactic
was screaming their labels
on FOX network cable
which made Obama's landslide anti-climactic

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 12:30 PM | Report abuse

That smooth new young pol named Barack
Based his primary run on Iraq
But when the market went south
He picked Joe the mouth
And trounced John the vet and the shark

Posted by: chris_p | November 4, 2008 12:32 PM | Report abuse

There once was a soldier called Mac
Whose henchwoman staged an attack
Sarah doled out the smears
And winked at the leers
Yet made no dent in Barack

Posted by: lindsayhowerton | November 4, 2008 12:33 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named McCain
Who we used to think had a brain
Though he claimed "Country First"
his VP choice was the worst
An on his image a rather large stain

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 12:35 PM | Report abuse

An end to eight bad Bush years,
Maybe hope can replace all our fears,
And if it goes wrong,
Its just not that long,
Next election starts tomorrow, my dears!

I’m so glad I’m not in a swing-state
Ads and calls, my life would inundate
But my vote in N Y,
Makes no diff, it’s no lie,
See, Penn votes have so much more weight!

Posted by: mediator27 | November 4, 2008 12:38 PM | Report abuse

On Tuesday, this November four
I jumped from the bed to the floor
Excited was I
Once more for a try
To win this election for Gore

Posted by: alexandravanbever | November 4, 2008 12:41 PM | Report abuse

McCain needed a shot in the arm
But his choice of VPs set off alarms
Because she was clearly not smart
Doncha know, bless her heart
She gets what she wants through her charm

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 12:46 PM | Report abuse

There once was a Sarah named Palin
Who mastered winkin' and whalin'.
But she drifted too South
Where her bright red mouth
Overloaded her tail en'.

Posted by: mitchald1 | November 4, 2008 12:47 PM | Report abuse

McCain's campaign was put on a shelf
Though really he could only blame himself
With Palin's smears and winks
She provided plenty of ink
And started everyone guessing about 2012

Posted by: ecglotfelty | November 4, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

A tight race makes impressive news shows
And McCain has to keep a strong pose
But Obama has won
And the GOP's done
'Cept for stripping keyboards of their O's

Posted by: polystyreneman | November 4, 2008 12:52 PM | Report abuse

McCain's mascot was a plumber, no doubt
During debates, Joe's name he would shout
After initial intrigue
We found this man was out of his league
and had no idea what he was talking about

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 12:53 PM | Report abuse

The junior senator from Illinois
Has a sharply honed talent to still annoy
The rabidly right
And the terminally white,
So today's one that decent folks will enjoy.

Posted by: PBAndrew | November 4, 2008 12:54 PM | Report abuse

I'll tell you something about this election that's true,
The McCain Campaign's limerick stopped at line TWO.

Posted by: chutz748 | November 4, 2008 12:57 PM | Report abuse

The candidate, he was quite newish
But the need for a change seemed so trueish
When he said, "Yes, we can."
We said, "that one's" our man
And the red states began to turn bluish.

Posted by: yitke | November 4, 2008 12:57 PM | Report abuse

Could it be that the Fates have aligned,
To empower so many maligned,
By Bush the draft-dodger,
And Cheney the Codger,
Due to whom our country’s declined?

It’s been oh so hard to endure
A Rovian world (pure manure).
We’ve had years of Bush
With his head up his tush,
And McCain sure as hell ain’t the cure.

What will the Bush legacy be?
I have to believe history
Will show his success
Was to make such a mess
That Obama’s campaign could succeed.

Posted by: Consider_the_source | November 4, 2008 1:00 PM | Report abuse

They’ve asked who is Barack Obama
They’ve hinted he’s pals with Osama
The tricks were in vain
And he’ll beat John McCain
Now they’ll call him President Obama

Posted by: adamdavidcollins | November 4, 2008 1:02 PM | Report abuse

There once was a scheming old maverick,
Who attempted a nasty campaign trick,
A professor named Ayers,
About whom no one cares,
Was his worst trick since his VP pick!

Posted by: chiswald | November 4, 2008 1:06 PM | Report abuse

Palin's back in the wild, her frozen 'hood,
watchin' hockey and sawin' wood.
Back in the land of the angry moose,
where they don't say "gotcha'" when your tongue gets loose.
Promise me, promise, she's gone for good.

Posted by: wordly1 | November 4, 2008 1:08 PM | Report abuse

My friends, I'm John McCain and I'm trailin'
My campaign is adrift and is flailin'
How best to conquer That One?
Well, Kay Bailey I'll shun!
But she woulda been better than Palin!

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 1:09 PM | Report abuse

The debate among all the contenders -
How best to be homeland defenders?
Changed gears in a hurry
When the market caused worry
For all of us - lenders and spenders.

Posted by: yitke | November 4, 2008 1:10 PM | Report abuse

There were many who told us to doubt
Now watch as they're voted out
They told us that hopes
Are only for dopes
And now they are facing a rout

A feeling that grew from that coast to this
Was met by opponents with boos and a hiss
But change we demanded
It looks like it's landed
Dividers and cynics we now can dismiss

Posted by: skywriter95 | November 4, 2008 1:13 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man from ar-zoni
Who's wife was snarky and bony
He tried to change fate
By spreading his hate
But only ol' bony would take his baloney

Posted by: martiniano | November 4, 2008 1:18 PM | Report abuse

There once was a news woman named Katie
Whose rep was considered far less than weighty
Then with Sarah she sat,
Who proved such a dingbat
That Kate's ratings increased nearly 80.

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 1:20 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Barack
Who wanted us out of Iraq
He's promised us health care
And cash back and welfare
I do hope it isn't a crock

Posted by: AustinLemur | November 4, 2008 1:21 PM | Report abuse

A VP pick, called most sensational
Failed badly at tasks, conversational.
Though she wore elite dress
Found no love from the press,
And most voters found her non-rational.

Posted by: slenon | November 4, 2008 1:23 PM | Report abuse

We saw McCain throw out many Hail Mary prayers
Like when he chose for VP a know-nothing mayor
Then he dubbed, on a lark,
his opponent 'Karl Marx'
to drum up another Red scare

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 1:25 PM | Report abuse

When the governor ruined Alaska,
The candidate said: "I'll ask 'er,"
To join the campaign,
Though she's nothing but pain,
And will ensure we end up in Nebraska.

Posted by: PBAndrew | November 4, 2008 1:26 PM | Report abuse

The mavericky Palin & McCain
Attempted to stop Barack’s train.
But hope drove Obama
He eliminated the drama.
“Yes we can” is now our refrain.

Posted by: lhpress | November 4, 2008 1:29 PM | Report abuse

There once was an erratic old man
His campaign, as a whole, had no plan
Sell nothing but fear
The economy...um...stay clear
And on election day get the trash can

Posted by: d-rose | November 4, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

Post reporters Capehart and 'Gene
Regularly appeared on the cable news scene
Yes, great newswriters they be,
But they've become STARS on TV!
There's not enough mirrors in which they can preen.


Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 1:37 PM | Report abuse

To a new president, we say welcome!
These last eight years have been troublesome.
So stick to your note
As we all got to vote
And when it comes to the troops, bring them home!

Posted by: gopherpolitics | November 4, 2008 1:40 PM | Report abuse

A dashing young man from Chicago
First pilloried HillarIago
He then nailed McCain
Who failed to chicane
And gave John and Sarah the heave-ho

Posted by: msigman | November 4, 2008 1:40 PM | Report abuse

Two years we've been waiting to see
Who the next president's going to be
Too many candidates
And no real mandates
Have led to a state of anarchy.

Posted by: gopherpolitics | November 4, 2008 1:41 PM | Report abuse

The campaign has gone on much too long
Much too long for five lines of song
So all that I'll say
Is by the end of the day
Half those damned pollsters will be proven wrong!

Posted by: gopherpolitics | November 4, 2008 1:42 PM | Report abuse

Enfranchisement: America’s core.
What our founders had fought and died for.
Yet the capital city—
Overtaxed, such a pity—
Has one rep who can't vote on the floor.

Posted by: Squatty_HJ | November 4, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

Obama is famously mellow
Hailed by all as a likable fello
But with Hillary he dispatched
In a cold Super-Tuesday match
And John and Sarah will soon follow

Posted by: skeptic67 | November 4, 2008 1:47 PM | Report abuse

There was an election this year
That lifted us up from the fear
That had kept our great nation
On an eight-year vacation
And nearly made hope disappear


Posted by: bgraham1 | November 4, 2008 1:49 PM | Report abuse

To choose 'tween Barack and McCain,
You would hardly think causes a strain,
Yet for almost two years,
Breaking funding frontiers,
They've been driving us slowly insane.

Posted by: AzulitaSola | November 4, 2008 1:50 PM | Report abuse

The Democrats coasted to wins
On waves Republican sins
And by promising much --
Lower taxes and such --
But now the hard part begins

Posted by: polystyreneman | November 4, 2008 1:51 PM | Report abuse

When John McCain chose Sarah Palin
The Hilary fans were still wailin'.
Would the voters switch teams
Based on gender? It seems
That his unvetted choice caused his failin'.

Posted by: yitke | November 4, 2008 1:53 PM | Report abuse

When engaged in a contest political
Running mate choice is most critical
Avoid giggles and winks
Pick a partner who thinks,
And possesses some skills analytical

Posted by: slenon | November 4, 2008 1:53 PM | Report abuse

There once was a candidate Palin
who entered a race that was flailing
At her opponents she jeered
as her following cheered
but her party just ended up ailing

Posted by: lezlie_nann | November 4, 2008 1:55 PM | Report abuse

There once was a Governor named Sarah,
Who hailed from Wasilla, Alaska,
When her handlers got antsy
They bought clothes very fancy,
But instead caused political disaster.

Posted by: aljanklow | November 4, 2008 1:56 PM | Report abuse

There was a lame duck president,
Who had become quite impotent,
Except in one way:
Election Day!
Which McCain will forever resent.

Posted by: skabizza | November 4, 2008 1:57 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Barack,
Whose campaign Mrs. Palin would mock,
She took careful aim,
But her claims were just lame,
And the Democrats WON, what a shock!

Posted by: katrinka1 | November 4, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

We started lo long months ago
A new president, a new leader to know.
With deep discontent
On our last 8 years spent
With split government, Bush versus Demo.

Well-organized was Hillary’s run.
But her phalanx was finally undone
By Obama’s uplift
An orator’s gift
And a press all agog with Kenya’s son.

Voters signed up, a huge brand-new number.
Dismay, fear, excitement awoke us from slumber.
Throw the insiders out!
It should be a rout!
Bush’s ratings do McCain heavily encumber.

Historic choices we have: Gender and race.
Can we follow, can we trust, a strangely new face?
Don’t say it out loud
Shame! says the crowd
We struggle to overcome past disgrace.

Out came the selections of Vice-Presidents.
Demos fret over Biden’s too-truthful comments.
Palin appeared
Too young, some feared
But she appealed to the faithful with pro-life-ing bents.

The economy fell into a deep, deeper funk.
Banks and insurers swooned with mortgages that stunk.
Fed tried to halt the fall
Let’s nationalize it all!
Never admit some should not own a house – you punk!

And meanwhile McCain who has done his own thinking
Tries to overcome his ticket’s R, which is stinking.
Obama the rhetoritician
Overcomes racial fission
And sells us wealth redistribution, with the economy sinking.

Now the pols, the polsters and the pundits must wait.
Americans digest both spectacle and debate.
We vote, we count.
Democracy’s fount
Will soon yield the leader, and outline the next 4 years’ fate.

Posted by: carriekanderson | November 4, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

The pundits who speak for the right
All cruised to Alaska one night
Their collective failin'
Got shipwrecked on Palin
And took McCain out of the fight.

Posted by: slenon | November 4, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

John McCain is an alpha-ish male
Whose judgment is well past the Pail-
In his choice of VP
He charmed Rove and Cheney,
But the moderates ended his tale.

Posted by: HughBk | November 4, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

At the start it was thought to be Hill's
The Wynette-esque wife of Bill's
No part of his ride
Now she stands by his side
By "his" I mean Obama's not Bill's

Posted by: gocardsgo05 | November 4, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

There once was a maverick McCain
Who embarked on a train wrecked campaign
With a mayor and a plumber
It couldn't get any dumber
It ended the Karl Rove reign

Posted by: bgraham1 | November 4, 2008 2:11 PM | Report abuse

A man named McCain was a hero,
But his sad VP pick was a zero,
All his eggs in one basket,
Delivered a casket,
Campaign dead on arrival, I fear, Oh!

Posted by: katrinka1 | November 4, 2008 2:12 PM | Report abuse

The campaign has been pretty rough sailin'
For Republicans -- hear them a-wailin'?
For their leader, McCain,
Took a gamble, in vain,
And their ticket is just self-imPalin.

Posted by: stillbooming | November 4, 2008 2:12 PM | Report abuse

What to make of this woman named "Maverick"?
Whose sole quality is to boast 'spensive fabric
"I'm frugal!" she claims,
"I ain't like those rich dames!"
Well, we doubt she bought them over at Pick-Wick.

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 2:13 PM | Report abuse

In the past, citizens have been warier --
Such a radical change was a barrier.
But to fear the unknown
Now seems way overblown --
It's so bad that the known's even scarier.

Posted by: DIS2 | November 4, 2008 2:14 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man, John McCain
Who's run quite a vicious campaign
He says "Team of Mavericks"
Which can't even exist!
Skewed judgment is palin (oops, I mean plain)

Posted by: AustinLemur | November 4, 2008 2:14 PM | Report abuse

Obama Obama Obama!
Obama Obama Obama!
(Did you say McCain?
That's not the refrain!)
Obama Obama Obama!

I know that it won't get much suction,
But this is my simple instruction:
In 2012,
Why don't we shelve
Campaigns that are based on destruction?

This Campaign was like a megillah
That stretches from here to Wasilla
Are you tired of "hope?"
At the end of your rope?
Do not fear: we have slain the gorilla.

I'm reelin' from feelin' like Palin,
Droppin' stuff off what I'm sayin'.
Now "ing" can come back--
Give thanks to Barack
For one final change to believe in.

Pollsters: a hard word to rhyme to.
I'm not really sure what I should do.
But here's an idea
That brings me some cheer:
I'll ignore them and hope that you will, too.

Finally this endless campaign ends.
No more "change," no more "hope," no more "my friends."
Yes, I'll admit
I'll miss it a bit.
But do it again? Hard to say. It depends.

Let's give three cheers for the red, white, and blue;
My land and your land and spacious skies, too;
Spangled and free,
'Tis of you, 'Tis of me:
When we cast our votes, we make it all true.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 2:15 PM | Report abuse

Tis the end of a campaign sublime...
No longer will my doorbell chime.
And who will call me?
Or bombard my TV?
Now what will I do with my time?

Posted by: yitke | November 4, 2008 2:15 PM | Report abuse

There once was a guy named McCain,
Who was supposed to run a decent campaign.
But when he chose Sarah Palin
And our banks needed bailin',
We decided to elect the one named Hussein.

Posted by: mestrin22 | November 4, 2008 2:18 PM | Report abuse

I saw lines out the door at the polls.
Frantic workers were checking the rolls
What did I see?
Democracy.
Even the hassles were good for our souls.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 2:19 PM | Report abuse

Both Zogby and Gallup decree
In this land of the brave and the free
That the voting is done
At a quarter past one
When the winner's announced on TV

Posted by: zenia | November 4, 2008 2:24 PM | Report abuse

Sarah Palin has suits worth my pension,
It seems to have caused some descension,
If Barack could just swear,
That from KMart he'd wear,
A Blue Special, I'd give him a mention.

Posted by: katrinka1 | November 4, 2008 2:24 PM | Report abuse

Sarah, winning an election is like field dressing moose
be careful with your knife or you’ll cut the bowels loose
and if you can’t contain that stuff
you’ll find the going extra tough
and instead of having moose you’ll have your well-cooked goose

Posted by: engelmann | November 4, 2008 2:25 PM | Report abuse

John McCain, oh what is your goal?
Bring up Wright? Or how about coal?
You found that nothing will stick,
But that most damaging trick
On yourself: Your drop in the poll.

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 2:27 PM | Report abuse

There once was a desperate campaign
That seized on a Mayor of Very Little Brain:
Though her credentials were dubious,
She sported a uterus!
"Good enough! Hail Mary!" wheezed the ancient McCain.

Posted by: orata | November 4, 2008 2:30 PM | Report abuse

ok, i'm done...5 entries submitted! good luck to all!

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 2:31 PM | Report abuse

November Americans stand tall.
Because no matter who wins this Fall,
Wednesday will find us
The Bush years behinds us:
Cause for celebration to all.

Posted by: seg70 | November 4, 2008 2:31 PM | Report abuse

McCain was once in the middle
but his integrity has become second fiddle
to winning over the right,
consumed by hatred and fright,
And his respect from the rest is now little.

Posted by: Kems | November 4, 2008 2:32 PM | Report abuse

Thank god for the Daily Show news
For bringing out all us young Dem-o blues
The GOP fears and knows
What the polls will all show
The old fogey’s not the one that we’ll choose

“Real America!” was the lie that she sold
Like we all fit the geographical mold
But living near wheat and sheep
Won’t make us vote her for veep
Guess we’re leaving the “patriot’s” fold

Some folks smear Barack: “An elitist!”
But there’s an obvious error in that treatise
Since when’s it so awful
To be well-read and lawful?
One should ask Joe the Plumber if HE is.

Posted by: coriopaxi | November 4, 2008 2:32 PM | Report abuse

A vote for “Maverick” McCain
Would add to our national pain
But a vote for Obama
Will help heal the trauma
And put us back on the right track again.

Posted by: blackdogdc | November 4, 2008 2:33 PM | Report abuse

A self-esteem guru once said
“I must find a way to earn bread.
But Oprah, I fear
Just stole my idea
So, I’ll run for the White House instead!”

Posted by: Adam1020000 | November 4, 2008 2:35 PM | Report abuse

John McCain was the Straight Talk Express
As for Clinton? The ordained heiress.
Along came a caucus--
Things got kind of raucous!--
Then Obama emerged from the mess.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 2:39 PM | Report abuse

There once ran a man named McCain,
Who oft said, "I'm not the same
As my buddy, George Bush"
(Who sat on his tush
As his numbers sent John down the drain!

Posted by: pjpatl | November 4, 2008 2:40 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Obama,
Who triggered much hope and high drama.
With the polls in his favour,
Despite maverick behaviour,
Palin sadly returns her pajamas.

Posted by: hhkim | November 4, 2008 2:40 PM | Report abuse

An old geezer from 'Zona named Johnny,
Sicced an Alaskan pit bull upon we.
As polls steadily dipped,
Her teeth lost their firm grip;
John regretted he didn't pick Romney.

Posted by: SmittytheTerp | November 4, 2008 2:41 PM | Report abuse

While detractors sniffed "He's not a resident!"
His supporters insisted "He's heaven-sent!"
But he's only a man
Who followed his plan.
Obama – the forty-fourth President.


Posted by: jimklenn | November 4, 2008 2:42 PM | Report abuse

Terrorist! Liberal! Maverick!
Voter fraud! Bigotry! Make it stick!
Who are your friends?
Did he say "Depends"?
Whoops--pardon me: I'm gonna be sick.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 2:45 PM | Report abuse

A VEEP candidate from Alaska
Was so unprepared for the taska
Facing media scrutiny
She incited a mutiny.
Why'd McCain ever aska?

Posted by: blackdogdc | November 4, 2008 2:46 PM | Report abuse

Barack has finally bridged the gap,
That once divided the U.S. map.
McCain and Palin can pack it in,
While Obama and Biden celebrate their win.
Election 2008 is a wrap!

Posted by: LivinParadise | November 4, 2008 2:47 PM | Report abuse

Eight years ago, Dubya won.
And again in '04, oh what fun!
Eight years as the boss,
And only one loss,
In the year when he couldn't have run!

Posted by: niwntc | November 4, 2008 2:49 PM | Report abuse

When the GOP made its VP pick,
It felt like a Rovian cheap trick.
But I saw right through it.
This pit bull won't do it.
That's why I marked my ballot with lipstick.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 2:49 PM | Report abuse

An articulate leader, my word!
His rhetoric soars like a bird.
A prez who is eloquent,
A gift that seems heaven-sent
After years of expressions absurd.

Posted by: yitke | November 4, 2008 2:49 PM | Report abuse

McCain's impulsive and manic.

Obama is cool. He won't panic.

Are there any chances

They'll keep my finances

From sinking just like the Titanic?

Posted by: AR123 | November 4, 2008 2:50 PM | Report abuse

When you hail from the rosy Midwest
Ballots seldom provide any contest,

The trend is "Vote NO!"
Whether schools, rights, or dough,

And then loudly attest "I'M OPPRESSED!"

Posted by: JuliaVH | November 4, 2008 2:50 PM | Report abuse

Obama the Cool Cat is ready
To follow some Bull Moose name Teddy
on taxes progressive.
"How Marxist! Excessive!"
Shouts Maverick Mac the Unsteady.

Posted by: Hypatia3 | November 4, 2008 2:52 PM | Report abuse

Vice President-candidate Palin,
When told that her ticket was trailin'
Felt her heart sink,
Packed up her cute wink
And joined the Republicans' wailin'.

Posted by: JerseyGirl4 | November 4, 2008 3:01 PM | Report abuse

After trailing Obama all summer,
McCain found a new "friend," Joe the Plumber.
Before, his tactics seemed bad,
But admit it, now, this is just sad!
It seems they're remaking Dumb and Dumber.

When McCain's got that bad melanoma
Who cares about Sarah's X chromosomas?
When you hear what she says,
Do you really want her to be prez
When God calls John McCain back a-home-a?

After winking and wrinkling her nose
Saying, "You're bankrupt? Ooh, I know how it goes..."
This book-bannin', moose-killin'
Unethical Wasillan
Spent $150K on her clothes.

Posted by: orata | November 4, 2008 3:01 PM | Report abuse

On election day every four years
Politicians shed crocodile tears
For transgressions so vile
They'd make Cheney smile
But are never as bad as their peers'

Posted by: zenia | November 4, 2008 3:03 PM | Report abuse

The right cheered when McCain chose Guv Palin
Worried Democrats started a-quailin’.
But the left grew ecstatic
When she proved erratic
Now the GOP’s doing the wailin’.

Posted by: robertwlaird | November 4, 2008 3:05 PM | Report abuse

They hinted and winked at "Obama"
And how well it rhymes with "Osama"
But speaking of names
Do we want "Son of Cain"?
That's not so good Biblical karma!

Posted by: Hypatia3 | November 4, 2008 3:07 PM | Report abuse

As I write this the voters are speaking.
Fox viewers are probably freaking.
But slinging the mud
Has proven a dud -
Hope and change were the things we were seeking.

Posted by: yitke | November 4, 2008 3:07 PM | Report abuse

This limerick is written by Palin,
And I'm just gonna ignore your liberal media "gotcha" rules and requirements
About rhyming, which is also
A socialist agenda
So too and also in my experience
As a mayor of the buckets of job creation
I can see Russia from my house

Posted by: bgraham1 | November 4, 2008 3:08 PM | Report abuse

Attention all plumbers who speak on TV:
I have a question that's bothering me.
When you plug McCain
Then unplug my drain
Do you bill for each service at the same fee?

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 3:10 PM | Report abuse

There once was a Sen named McCain
Who's now run for the White House again
Though he chattered and swore
And threw mud galore
It seems that his quest's been in vain.

Posted by: tonee1 | November 4, 2008 3:13 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Obama
He said to his wife: "Do you wanna"?
She said with a thrill:
"Let's kick Hillary and Bill
to the curb and get on with our mantra"

There once was a torturer named John
He'd forgotten all his time back in 'Nam
As he said with a spin
I agree with Cheney and Him
Country first?
I learned business from Cin! (Budweiser first!)


Posted by: Mitchavery7 | November 4, 2008 3:17 PM | Report abuse

“A young Marxist muslim named Hussein
was told by his handlers the game -
lay low, learn the law
join a church, show no flaw”
said the whispers with other theories insane

Posted by: engelmann | November 4, 2008 3:21 PM | Report abuse

All my money is still on Bob Barr,
Though the odds have him lagging by far.
If I can't get the win,
Place or show, it's no sin,
'Cause I'm broke and I live in my car.

Posted by: mikeo2 | November 4, 2008 3:22 PM | Report abuse

There was a man called McCain I respected
Said he was honest and to Bush not connected
But to the right he did veer
And his campaign was all smear
So I thank god he will not be elected

Posted by: JHarlsson | November 4, 2008 3:23 PM | Report abuse

The end of the robo-call's near
And the pollsters will all shed a tear
Cos the campaign has been thrilling
But its the end of the billing
Wait! a new one begins just next year!

Posted by: chris_p | November 4, 2008 3:23 PM | Report abuse

A candidate that fills us with hope,
Steps up to face off with a dope.
The turnout's real strong,
Voting day lines are long.
If he loses how will we cope?

Posted by: doodahman | November 4, 2008 3:27 PM | Report abuse

When McCain witnessed party defection
He decided to make a correction
Sarah blew people's minds
And although she looked fine
She just didn't give John an election

Posted by: bgraham1 | November 4, 2008 3:30 PM | Report abuse

I may be an average Joe
And my vote is usually No
But in this case
I return to my base
And go for the one with the glow.

Posted by: infuse | November 4, 2008 3:31 PM | Report abuse

A voter from Battleground State
Considered his poor nation's fate.
He was jeered and derided
As a weak "Undecided":
He opted for Red -- but too late.

Posted by: Bronco1 | November 4, 2008 3:33 PM | Report abuse

The race has been, no denying,
A chasm of philosophies vying
For real control
Of where we will go;
Sure ‘nuff, one side will be crying!

Posted by: BillFer | November 4, 2008 3:33 PM | Report abuse

There once was a hollow man out on the stump.
He hunched his shoulders and spoke like a grump:
"Listen, my friends:
How the world ends
Is not with a bang but with a fist-bump."

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 3:35 PM | Report abuse

Rove said Obama would win
And for once I will listen to him
But the biggest delight
Is that after tonight
Rove’s lovely light will be dimmed.

Posted by: sternab1 | November 4, 2008 3:39 PM | Report abuse

McCain calls himself a maverick
But his ideas always seem static
He tried with ole Sarah
But that was an error
And now his campaign is in havoc

Posted by: sternab1 | November 4, 2008 3:41 PM | Report abuse

The Republicans march to the beat
Of the GOP drums in retreat
The Democrats swoon
and promise the moon
And dream of that 60th seat

Posted by: zenia | November 4, 2008 3:42 PM | Report abuse

Strong will, strong mind but soft spoken
Obama will leave McCain chokin'
With a movement of change
He'll have much rearranged
Its now time to fix what was broken

Posted by: balaz2ta | November 4, 2008 3:43 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Obama,
In a mighty political drama,
He gave Hilary pain,
And outflanked McCain,
Now next on the list is Osama!

Posted by: ayeom | November 4, 2008 3:44 PM | Report abuse

There’s President Elect Obama
Of whom we know nothing, but oughta
The liberal media’s passing,
Too busy Bush bashing,
And now live with it, we gotta.

Posted by: GSS1 | November 4, 2008 3:46 PM | Report abuse

With moose hunts,an abstinence theory,
And winking at pit bull jokes smeary,
Double speak that disjoints,
And bizarre talking points…
Sarah Palin just made us feel weary.

John McCain,who’s a septegeniarian
Tried to play to the crowd proletarian
But the White House won’t be
“Old Folk’s Home” for MC,
He’ll remain Arizona’s contrarian.


The campaign run by Mr.Obama
Caused the GOP staff lots of trauma.
While Palin was hidin,’
Only gaffs by Joe Biden
Provided some sound bites of drama.

Posted by: Fallowfield | November 4, 2008 3:46 PM | Report abuse

For votes McCain called a plumber
Who said “Obama’s a bummer!”
When the votes were cast
And McCain was outclassed,
He couldn’t have felt any dumber.

Posted by: JackTar1 | November 4, 2008 3:51 PM | Report abuse

First he tested the "terrorist" label,
Then developed a "socialist" fable.
When debating each other
Show respect to your brother --
It's too bad that McCain's not McAble.

Posted by: DIS2 | November 4, 2008 3:51 PM | Report abuse

There was a senator from Arizona.
He stated "stright talk" was his personna.
McCain thought the fundamentals of the economy was sound.
But the stock market didn't rebound.
The economy stampeded him like a bull in Pamplona.

Posted by: raidhjk | November 4, 2008 3:53 PM | Report abuse

Amended:

When John McCain made his running-mate pick,
It seemed like another Rovian trick.
But I saw right through it.
This pit bull won't do it.
So I marked my ballot with bright red lipstick.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 3:54 PM | Report abuse

There once was a Senator named McCain,
Who sided with Dems once and again,
Scoffed in their face,
He did at his party’s base,
And now he’s lost the campaign.

Posted by: GSS1 | November 4, 2008 3:54 PM | Report abuse

Republican voters complain:
"What's happened to our John McCain?
Our prospects are palin'
The candidate's failin' -
We're jumping to Obama's train!"

Posted by: tlang1 | November 4, 2008 3:58 PM | Report abuse

There once was a black man named Obama
Who was born of a Kansas white Mamma
And when he said "Yes we can"
Then purple we became,
As the red ran into the blue.

Posted by: clarkw | November 4, 2008 4:03 PM | Report abuse

There was once an election in '08
Where Sarah Palin was a runnin' mate
Of Senator John McCain
When she did'nt dress plain
'Twas handed to Obama on a plate

Posted by: skuttikkad | November 4, 2008 4:03 PM | Report abuse

She was recently mayor of Wasilla,
But came on like some kind of Godzilla.
She fought tooth and nails,
Put air in their sails,
But they lost in a last-minute thrillah.

Posted by: marty_mccullen | November 4, 2008 4:07 PM | Report abuse

There once was a man named Barack
He moved millions with awesome talk
Met a man named McCain
Smiled, said "More of the same
Loses to change and outta Iraq."

Posted by: lenmac79 | November 4, 2008 4:10 PM | Report abuse

How did you come to decide in the end?
Tea leaves or voodoo or ask your best friend?
I am perplexed,
Verging on vexed.
Undecided?! I don't comprehend.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 4:12 PM | Report abuse

Consider this fellow Obama,
Cool-headed and real with no drama.
In God we do trust.
Its DC or bust.
He’s the 44th Prez, Bet Your Mama!

Posted by: mamajoe | November 4, 2008 4:15 PM | Report abuse

Campaign '08, what a doozy.
Some say it made them feel woozy.
The candidates were well versed,
Though at times too rehearsed.
Hooray! Now let's all just go get boozy.

Posted by: peanuthead | November 4, 2008 4:18 PM | Report abuse

Turns out the bailout won't have to proceed.
Stop all the sell off; hold on to your deed.
Obama will fix it.
The bailout? Just nix it.
His extra campaign funds will fill the need.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 4:20 PM | Report abuse

Obama is screaming, “We’ve failed!”
The truth is closer to “prevail”
The left hates the fact -
We’re winning in Iraq,
But, now we’re gonna tuck tail.

Posted by: GSS1 | November 4, 2008 4:20 PM | Report abuse

In the polls, McCain and Palin are wilting
Because of economic policy from Friedman comma Milton
and the Global financial crisis he spawned
McCain should have withdrawn
As his future looked brighter in the Hanoi Hilton

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 4:23 PM | Report abuse

They said that Obama lacked "tough"--
Too smooth when the going got rough.
But they didn't know,
To win the whole show,
Speak softly and carry a Plouffe.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 4:28 PM | Report abuse

McCain/Palin has caused quite a buzz
If they lose we know why -- it's because
McCain chose the dame
Forrest Gump knew to blame
"Stupid is," as he said, "stupid does."


Posted by: Bodoc | November 4, 2008 4:29 PM | Report abuse

(Note: in homage to Froomkin)

There once ruled a man named Karl Rove--
Muddy politics his true treasure trove!
But Obama appeared,
And as poor Rovie leered,
The fate of Republicans dove!

Posted by: pjpatl | November 4, 2008 4:31 PM | Report abuse

In a good move without precedent

We've elected a Black president

We've chosen Obama

Due to phenomena

That point to him being provident.

Posted by: barbaramcdowellwhitt | November 4, 2008 4:32 PM | Report abuse

He thinks poor folks, not rich, need more dough.
Offshore drilling? More wars? He says no.
Anti-torture, pro-choice...
Who's this brilliant voice?
John McCain, circa eight years ago.

Posted by: RisingPun | November 4, 2008 4:33 PM | Report abuse

A bitter old man named McCain
Tried his best to keep changing the game
The woman from Wasilla,
Turned a conservative Godzilla,
Is now focused on the O-12 campaign

Posted by: Editaur | November 4, 2008 4:33 PM | Report abuse

Bush sits in the White House alone,
Waiting beside his phone.
He wants to campaign -
He'll get on his plane,
But no one gives him a call.

Posted by: maggots | November 4, 2008 4:34 PM | Report abuse

That the economy did in McClain
Is now so plain
One day we're sound
And the next on the ground
And so we'll suspend until we stand up again (or Friday)

Posted by: clarkw | November 4, 2008 4:34 PM | Report abuse

There once was a boy named Barry.
No ordinary Tom, Dick or Harry,
He organized his block,
Used his real name, Barack,
And made right-wingers bluster, “How dare he?”

Posted by: lesismore | November 4, 2008 4:42 PM | Report abuse

A grumpy old gent named John Mac
Thought he'd win if he went on attack.
But he failed to set out
What he's all about,
So the country elected Barack.

Posted by: JerseyGirl4 | November 4, 2008 4:46 PM | Report abuse

ok, one more:

There once was a woman named Palin
New political heights she tried scalin'
But she never read books
(She got by on her looks)
So the Veep job she just won't be nailin'

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 4:46 PM | Report abuse

Johnny goes a'courtin:

Why darlin' you know you can trust me.
We're mavericks both, so it must be.
But it sure breaks the mood
When the burly first dude
Shows up with his sled and his husky

Posted by: ocofaigh | November 4, 2008 4:47 PM | Report abuse

The Republican Party is beat
It's dumb macho will now not repeat
The People put stock
In the brighter Barack
Firing dummies and going elite.

Posted by: Bodoc | November 4, 2008 4:48 PM | Report abuse

There was a young neocon hack
Who was searching for weapons in Iraq.
Fred dug over here
And searched over there
But found nothing to put in his sack.

Posted by: maggots | November 4, 2008 4:50 PM | Report abuse

To vote for a man named Barack
I stood in a line round the block
Inching forward my feet
As I thought of Wall Street
It was something straight from Hitchcock.

Posted by: llcarchive | November 4, 2008 4:51 PM | Report abuse

Johnny’s lament:
As if things could get any glummer
I had to pose with the Gov. in his Hummer.
My campaign is trailin’
Springing leaks ‘cause of Palin.
Now has anyone seen Joe the Plumber?

Posted by: ocofaigh | November 4, 2008 4:58 PM | Report abuse

The decider sat in the West Wing
Waiting for his phone to ring.
I don’t mean to complain,
But is there a call from McCain?
It’s been months since I’ve heard a thing.

Posted by: socityej | November 4, 2008 5:07 PM | Report abuse

When stock market odds were a Pick 'em
The campaign plot did thicken
But the savvy Obama
Said, "No need for drama"
While Mac flapped around like a chicken

Posted by: CardinalFang | November 4, 2008 5:09 PM | Report abuse

There once was a change to believe in
Barack hoped it played well in Cleveland
All signs point to yes
But pundits won't guess:
Being wrong leaves them sick and heavin'

Posted by: johnfrankweaver1 | November 4, 2008 5:15 PM | Report abuse

A nod to the good fight of Hillary
Who brought women's rights off the pillory
Feminists notwithstanding
An unfortunate crash landing
Was delivered by Barack's artillery.

Posted by: JNelzzon | November 4, 2008 5:19 PM | Report abuse

In this corner, McCain and Palin
Battle Dems - who's ahead, who is trailin'?
They have fought for two years
Bringing Clinton to tears
'Till the winner emerged: Tina Feylin!

Posted by: BillyZ | November 4, 2008 5:26 PM | Report abuse

Don't begrudge Joe the Plumber his fame,
Instead look at his undisclosed shame.
Being known is a thrilla,
But remember: Attila
The Hun has the same middle name.

Posted by: calcala | November 4, 2008 5:26 PM | Report abuse

There once was a Sen. named Obama
Who resisted McCain's "Yo mamma"
He ran a clean race
Deserves first place
I voted in my pajamas!

Posted by: kevinpowell | November 4, 2008 5:29 PM | Report abuse

Message from the former minority,
Regarding your former authority.
Re: GOP
Now do you see?
Not permanent. Not a majority.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 5:33 PM | Report abuse

A VEEP candidate, Sarah Palin,
Called Obama un-American.
But Obama knew change
The voters would arrange.
On to the White House he was sailin’.

Posted by: cehrlic4 | November 4, 2008 5:34 PM | Report abuse

Palin called Obama elitist.
Her designer wardrobe was sweetest
Of values she treasured,
But voters had measured
Obama’s campaign race the fleetest.

Posted by: cehrlic4 | November 4, 2008 5:38 PM | Report abuse

There once was a voter for Nader
Steadfast, though her friends would berate her.
She thought, "What's the harm?"
And, "Third time's a charm."
They had to subdue and sedate her.

Posted by: calcala | November 4, 2008 5:39 PM | Report abuse

Obama's team knocks on my door.
They phone, they text and more.
For change, they hunger,
Older and younger,
Of all races from shore to shore.

Posted by: strider4 | November 4, 2008 5:42 PM | Report abuse

Once we're all done with our poll'in
And talking heads' gaffs and cajol'in
Note to us...vote the man
Who certainly can
Calm us down from this rockin' & rollin'

Posted by: vfgmne | November 4, 2008 5:42 PM | Report abuse

After Hillary, John, Mike and Mitt,
'Tween Barack and old John we were split.
Pastor Wright, Plumber Joe,
Sarah Palin, stocks' woe.
Down in history - 08's a hit.

Posted by: mikeo2 | November 4, 2008 5:44 PM | Report abuse

Jesse Jackson shares not our elation
Barack's rise caused him ego deflation
"I was THE FIRST candidate black male!"
"ME! Man, I blazed that trail!"
For solace, he pondered how to perform one's castration.

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 5:47 PM | Report abuse

If Johnny and Sarah could tell
That Barry and Joe gave em hell
Admits defeat
the Elephant's beat
Lets watch it on SNL

To send a sailor-a-sailin
Just couple with gov. Palin
when she brings the wrath
it turns out a gaffe
As Barry Obama's prevailing

The Rookie for Hope?, the Friar?
The Veteran Pilot inquired
He rolls up his sleeves
But aint Ivy League
No, Mavericks can't match Messiah's

The face of the world has color
Who better to lead, than a brotha
he'll roll up his sleeves
cause he's Ivy League
In D.C., word to your mother

Posted by: illyterate | November 4, 2008 5:50 PM | Report abuse

It looks like it might be Obama
Who takes over the hunt for Osama.
McCain wanted the duty.
He hand-picked a beauty.
But she couldn't handle the drama.

Posted by: noslok | November 4, 2008 5:54 PM | Report abuse

A pit bull in lipstick, Palin groused
That Obama the voters should oust.
She call him terrorist,
But Palin’s errorist.
Voters showed Obama the White House.

Posted by: cehrlic4 | November 4, 2008 5:56 PM | Report abuse

Tonight, TV will make a mint on
Viewers hoping for a hint on
McCain or Obama
Or, even more drama,
A written-in Senator Clinton.

Posted by: AlexRemington | November 4, 2008 5:58 PM | Report abuse

There once was a guy named Barack
whose career was largely a crock
he made friends with the crazies
as the Post sang his praise-ies
and now those gulags are almost a lock


To the far left the DNP fled
to get commies and bombers abed
With Obama atwitter
and Michelle claiming bitter
Thank god at least this state is red

Obama knew those mean banks were all racist
It was time to put them through their paces
Through a lawsuit ACORN
he heaped on the scorn
and knocked solvent owners right on their faces

A Civilian Security Force there must be
for Obama's daydreaming you see
of a time not too distant
when he'll be most insistent
that your own children report you to he

Posted by: zippyspeed | November 4, 2008 6:01 PM | Report abuse

She didn’t know Zanesville from Zurich
And had no responses for Couric
But that didn’t phase ‘em
In Six-Packers Nation
Her downfall was shopping couturic.

After primary votes were all toted
As speech after speech were emoted
And we heard the whole summer
About mavericks and plumbers
The economy tanked and we voted.

Obama says he stands for change
So do I, says the Maverick McCain.
With Biden and Palin
a-rasslin’ and flailin’
How’s the poor voter to gain?

The day Clinton lost to Obama
The campaign lost some of its drama
But Palin was willin’
To do stupidhead shillin’
As a moose-hunting hockey fan mama.

Posted by: Charles1953 | November 4, 2008 6:03 PM | Report abuse

My patience is growing quite weary;
Of campaigners; one young and one dreary
So on this great night,
That concludes the fight
I'll be half in the bag, no doubt teary..

--
Goodbye to the straight-talk express!
For tomorrow he'll have to confess
That repetitive stories,
of former-life glories
Could not, in the end, spell success.

--
From Obama's fame (much like a starlet)
To Ms. Palin, the ignorant tartlet
I do dare to say,
Have we been led astray?
Oh where in the world is Jeb Bartlet?!

Posted by: AB123 | November 4, 2008 6:04 PM | Report abuse

A sigh: at last, election day!
Awoke at dawn to have my say.
But one nagging doubt
As I filled it out:
Why couldn’t I pick Tina Fey?

Posted by: AlexRemington | November 4, 2008 6:07 PM | Report abuse

I once wrote a limerick for the Post
Which briefly was seen coast to coast
But it then disappeared
Into cyber thin air
And now I feel like Milquetoast

Posted by: turkerm | November 4, 2008 6:09 PM | Report abuse

I will vote at the end of the day,
Maybe John, or Barack: I won’t say.
They’re just fluff and chiffon;
Neither one turns me on.
It’s time to elect Tina Fey.

Posted by: papa94301 | November 4, 2008 6:14 PM | Report abuse

After eight years of high-handed drama
Voters are tired of the trauma.
We're sick of hypocrisy
Befouling democracy,
So we're gratefully cheering: "Obama!"

Posted by: tlang1 | November 4, 2008 6:21 PM | Report abuse

A pit bull in lipstick, Joe Sixpack,
Joe the Plumber, Wall Street’s stock attack —
McCain/Palin have spun,
But Obama has won.
Change is here, and his name is Barack.

Posted by: cehrlic4 | November 4, 2008 6:22 PM | Report abuse

McCain and Obama duked it out,
Through a cross-country-fifty-state-bout.
We hear from Jeremiah Wright,
And of Joe-the-Plumber's plight.
It was one hell of a political fight.

Posted by: danielsmith1 | November 4, 2008 6:25 PM | Report abuse

There once was a young man from Chi,
His aspirations terribly high.
Though accused oft of terror,
His foe was in error,
For Chi's was the pol that got by.

Posted by: wcurmudgeon | November 4, 2008 6:27 PM | Report abuse

Homeowners foreclosed in Nantucket
Were quite unable to duck it
This dumbfounded McCain
Whose suspended campaign
Was like moving the sea with a bucket

Posted by: zenia | November 4, 2008 6:29 PM | Report abuse

Who’da thunk Mac’s Hired Gun from Alaska,
Hockey Mom, Chief Exec, (multi-taska),
Packing six-gun and pucks,
Doling out the State’s bucks,
Would let newspaper reading unmaska?

Ray Skyrme

Posted by: ridy | November 4, 2008 6:30 PM | Report abuse

If you think that Obama and Biden
have a left-wing agenda they’re hidin’
since the other side’s man
supports bombing Iran,
please just vote for your Mom as a write-in.

Posted by: thebenedict | November 4, 2008 6:33 PM | Report abuse

Just for a minute, let me be frank.
I know why Straight Talk started to tank.
It's easy you see.
Just listen closely:
The "Country First" slogan sounds like a bank.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 6:34 PM | Report abuse

There was a Senator: Hutchison, Kay
Who for the Veep, McCain kept at bay
"Experience is not what we track,
We're about 'Baby Got Back!"
So unless you're Palin, it's just not your day

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 6:40 PM | Report abuse

McCain and Obama duked it out,
Through a cross-country-fifty-state-bout.
We heard from Jeremiah Wright,
And of Joe-the-Plumber's plight.
It was one hell of a political fight.

Posted by: danielsmith1 | November 4, 2008 6:41 PM | Report abuse

Barack's so cool with his attackers --
His words could fell 10 Green Bay Packers.
I hope when he 'bums one'
He knows it becomes one
To not join the hack-hack-hack-hackers.

Posted by: cgsmith1 | November 4, 2008 6:43 PM | Report abuse

the right's like a broken record player
they keep bringing up a guy named Bill Ayers
but if she was progressive
they'd be much more aggressive
with this small town religious nutjob mayor

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 6:46 PM | Report abuse

Michelle's deeds are all painted as crass
While Cindy gets praised as "high-class"
So to beat her she found
A path so much profound
Let the voters KICK JOHN MCCAIN'S A**!

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 6:55 PM | Report abuse

Right from the start it seems everyone mocked her.
Telling McCain he just should have dropped her.
So we understand
If Sarah has planned
To shoot at the press from her helicopter.

Posted by: tgearty | November 4, 2008 7:00 PM | Report abuse

wingnuts never cease to amaze us
repeating endlessly their stupid stock phrases
yelling their slogans
they beat their chests like Hulk Hogan
please shut up you idiots, jaysus!

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 7:00 PM | Report abuse

Some thought that Barack's run was over
When Hillary swept through Hanover
But he pressed on with zeal
Now his victory's real
Our long national nightmare is over!

Posted by: swerving | November 4, 2008 7:04 PM | Report abuse

There once was a guy named Obama
Who next to McCain seemed much calmer.
He talked "change" and "hope"
Which sound pretty dope.
Let's elect him and improve our karma!

There once was a guy named Obama
With a black dad and a white mama.
He reached for a dream
And assembled a team.
He'll bring down McCain without drama.

Posted by: mominvienna | November 4, 2008 7:07 PM | Report abuse

Go back to your igloo Sarah P,
And keep an eye out for Putin 'cross the sea.
'Cause when he rears his head,
And fills your heart with dread,
You can say you saw Vlad from your spread.

Posted by: danielsmith1 | November 4, 2008 7:15 PM | Report abuse

His color seemed likely to sink him
This upstart from the Land of Lincoln
Then the market receded
And voters conceded
What we need to survive is his thinkin'.

Posted by: pharoahmtn | November 4, 2008 7:15 PM | Report abuse

McCain did again, that gambling ol' maverick,
When he choose his folksy vice presidential pick,
"Now Palin, all I'll ask you to do
Is turn swing states red in hue!"
"You betcha!" and she smeared the map with her lipstick

McCain thought he found his answer
With Palin as his campaign's necromancer,
So he showed no compunction
For her knowledge malfunction
And denied she was a vote-killing cancer

Alone in a booth on election day,
Which bias will my vote sway?
The pols so strange,
I want true change,
I'm writing in Tina Faye

Posted by: tisraina | November 4, 2008 7:15 PM | Report abuse

The sad tale of the American right
To save 'their country' put up a fight
But despite all the polls
Their eventual goals
Was mostly to keep the government white

Posted by: MrMichael | November 4, 2008 7:19 PM | Report abuse

correction

Alone in a booth on election day,
Which bias will my vote sway?
The candidates so strange,
I want true change,
I'm writing in Tina Fey

Posted by: tisraina | November 4, 2008 7:23 PM | Report abuse

This fall the economy tanks,
And we suddenly own all the banks.
We’re all truly depressed,
Not just merely recessed.
But one guy – Obama – says “Thanks.”

Posted by: papa94301 | November 4, 2008 7:24 PM | Report abuse

There was once a girl called Obama
who sang and twisted with drama
and on Youtube
The guys that viewed
Admired and shouted O'Mama

Posted by: bushaj | November 4, 2008 7:37 PM | Report abuse

He was a war hero, McCain,
Captured when they shot down his plane;
Through torture he grinned,
And never gave in,
But now he needs pills for his Pa[l]in.

"Our Sarah" bears quite a resemblance,
To a comic of certain preeminence.
If she were Tina Fey,
I'd shout a "hooray!"
But I still wouldn't show her some deference.

Posted by: anstevens | November 4, 2008 7:38 PM | Report abuse

The candidate forums were fun
But I'm glad the campaigning is done
'Cause despite McCain's slur
Today we concur
Barack's the debater "that won."

Posted by: Not_weingarten | November 4, 2008 7:39 PM | Report abuse

To change or not to change is the question
Barack posed for the general election.
"Can we stand four more years
Of false premises and smears?
No! Pick me when making your ballot selection!"


Cool-as-a-cucumber Obama
Does not tolerate campaign melodrama.
So Hillary as V.P.
Was surely not to be
For her, it's back to the Senate and Chappaqua-a!

Posted by: lisapoe | November 4, 2008 7:42 PM | Report abuse

Palin's 2012 predictions are bold
But deep down the hard truth will told
Republican losers get stale,
Just ask Dole and Dan Quayle
Her true options? Only Heff's centerfold!

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 7:45 PM | Report abuse

There was once a candidate for President
Who wanted to set a precedent
He did not avail
But did prevail
In endorsing the product Fixodent

Posted by: bushaj | November 4, 2008 7:51 PM | Report abuse

(correcting the typo in the second line)

Palin's 2012 predictions are bold
But deep down the hard truth will be told
Republican losers get stale,
Just ask Dole and Dan Quayle
Her true options? Only Heff's centerfold!

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 7:52 PM | Report abuse

Up to bat this time, Barack Obama,
A young rookie, a rank up-and-comma!
But in this crucial game,
Despite background and name,
He will hit this great nation’s Grand Slamma!

Ray Skyrme

Posted by: ridy | November 4, 2008 7:56 PM | Report abuse

A wink and a not and he let
A barracuda inside of his jet
Now he’s bit and he’s bleeding
His polls are receding
If only he's called for a vet!

Rick McDonald
Ketchikan (Nowhere) Alaska

Posted by: YourManInKetchikan | November 4, 2008 7:59 PM | Report abuse

Pool Levi! He's in a tight fix
Like Nixon, he has trouble with Dick's
"Hey, I'm just a typical male,
Her underage won't put me in jail,
This is just typical of us Alaskan trash hicks"

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 8:04 PM | Report abuse

As theatre the election’s abnormous
With an aspirant cast multiformous:
A plumber, a sixpack
Awaiting a call-back
By a plebiscite cleft and ginormous.

Posted by: ajmayhew | November 4, 2008 8:05 PM | Report abuse

They say it’s an historic election
Because of the diverse selection
But despite all the firsts
All the talk's of Palin’s skirts
And her daughter who didn’t use protection

Posted by: 123face | November 4, 2008 8:22 PM | Report abuse

The only true limerick is a dirty limerick, so here it is:

“The Undecided”
It’s a question I don’t want to duck
But after two years I admit that I’m stuck
Obama's the first black candidate, true
But Sarah Palin’s an important first too
The first candidate I’d like to . . . (go moose hunting with?)

Posted by: 123face | November 4, 2008 8:27 PM | Report abuse


There once was a politico named McCain,
Who's "straight talk" came out rather plain.
He called on "Joe the Plumber",
to help him beat Mr. Obama,
But in end, we all just felt his Pain...

Posted by: kenhyde | November 4, 2008 8:33 PM | Report abuse

i think 123face says it all! hahahahaha!

Posted by: KenFromCalifornia | November 4, 2008 8:33 PM | Report abuse

McCain's campaign: just so-so
Though he brought us a plumber named Joe
And Ayers and Wright
Gave Barack quite a fright
But he made one mistake "doncha know"!

Posted by: joehiatt | November 4, 2008 8:37 PM | Report abuse

Back when pundits were writing his obit,
John McCain hunkered down and beat Mike/Mitt.
But Obama proved tough,
Sarah Palin, just fluff.
Why did Hillary's delegates commit?

Posted by: mikeo2 | November 4, 2008 8:39 PM | Report abuse


I missed a preposition:

There once was a politico named McCain,
Who's "straight talk" came out rather plain.
He called on "Joe the Plumber",
to help him beat Mr. Obama,
But in the end, we all just felt his Pain...

Posted by: kenhyde | November 4, 2008 8:39 PM | Report abuse


Early on, the Gap would widen,
Mr. Obama, his time was Biden.
Mr. McCain got a wailin',
No help from Ms. Palin,
And only a couple of "Joes" to confide in.


Posted by: kenhyde | November 4, 2008 8:52 PM | Report abuse

The strategist they call Karl Rove
Took hold of McCain's campaign and drove.
The plan it was sailin'
'Til he made John pick Palin,
Which put McCain's tail on the stove.

Posted by: twobrats64 | November 4, 2008 8:52 PM | Report abuse

Sarah Palin stirred up the red base,
When for her Karl Rove made the case.
She fought with big oil
And ignited the loyal,
Now Troopergate she'll have to face.

Posted by: twobrats64 | November 4, 2008 8:54 PM | Report abuse


In D.C. a fellow found politics a bore.
But in '08 he was transfixed, more and more.
With the election of Obama,
He phoned to his momma,
"Guess they can't call it The 'White House' any more . . . "

Posted by: kenhyde | November 4, 2008 8:57 PM | Report abuse

John came out of the gate like a shot
'Til a smart VP choice he made not.
While Palin divided,
Most Republicans decided
That VP material she was not.

Posted by: twobrats64 | November 4, 2008 8:58 PM | Report abuse

The Straight Talk Express was derailed
When Palin Obama assailed.
Now after two years
Of speeches and tears,
She thinks she has the next nailed.

Posted by: twobrats64 | November 4, 2008 9:11 PM | Report abuse

While stock market numbers were failin’
The government frantic with bailin’
The only bright light
Came on Saturday Night
Watching Tina Fey do Sarah Palin

Posted by: maureencrawford | November 4, 2008 9:19 PM | Report abuse

As election night comes to a close,
After scurrilous rumors exposed.
Now all I can pray
Is that they all drift away,
All the Hannitys, Coulters, and Roves.

Posted by: twobrats64 | November 4, 2008 9:19 PM | Report abuse

Election Quartet

There was a bright man named Barack
Whose orations were not just a crock
People rued eight years past
Had a statesman at last
And with hope went to vote as a flock

There once was a senator Joe
Who had quite a hard road to hoe
He said things awry
Though his mouth sure would try
To fit not a foot but a toe

There was an old man named McCain
Who thought he had something to gain
Yes, Prez I will be
With Palin V.P.
But you betcha his quest was in vain

Palin was nailin' a moose
From a copter, so it was a ruse
She thought it was fair
To kill bulls from midair
And that's part of what cooked her own goose

Posted by: dmakay | November 4, 2008 9:19 PM | Report abuse

A naïve young lass from Wasilla
With new frocks flashed signs of Shopzilla
Alas she’s no matchup
No way she could catch up
To “The” Marcos’ shoes from Manila

Posted by: FranklyMyDear | November 4, 2008 9:21 PM | Report abuse


That quartet is a jewel. . .

Posted by: kenhyde | November 4, 2008 9:22 PM | Report abuse

Tuesday nite, it was cold and rainin',
But we stood in line without complainin'.
Obama would win,
Now let America begin,
To put and end to all our refrainin'.

Posted by: kenhyde | November 4, 2008 9:23 PM | Report abuse

A washed up old bomber named Ayres
About whom McCain doesn't care
Had in this year's campaign
Fifteen minutes of fame
But to Palin he doesn't compare

Posted by: mwmamerow | November 4, 2008 9:25 PM | Report abuse

The U S has blue states and red,
That's all there are some folks have said.
But mix red and blue,
You get a new hue,
So put these divisions to bed.

Posted by: f_kranzberg | November 4, 2008 9:25 PM | Report abuse

There once was a girl from St. Lou,
A Democrat there she was too.
She moved to DC,
Where her vote was not key.
Too bad she can't turn St. Lou blue.

Posted by: f_kranzberg | November 4, 2008 9:34 PM | Report abuse

Seems the race twixt J.M. and S.P.
Against Misters B.O. and J.B.,
A political fight,
Though "initially" tight
Ended HUGE for the ol' D.N.C.

Posted by: aceames1 | November 4, 2008 9:40 PM | Report abuse

"It's the economy, stupid" they say,
'Cept for McCain on that fateful Fall day.
Did it cost him the crown?
Or is Palin the clown,
Who cares - we enjoyed Tina Fey!

Posted by: f_kranzberg | November 4, 2008 9:40 PM | Report abuse

The Republican menu lacked drama,
So they served up a hot hockey mama.
But red meat on high heels
Is an unhealthy meal,
So, no thanks, I’ll be having Obama!

The GOP just wasn’t jumpin,’
So to get hardened arteries pumpin’
They inflated a doll
With no substance at all.
Tonight there’ll be lots of fist bumpin’.

When John McCain unleashed the kraken
He ignored the big risk he was takin.’
The Bush team mud-ballers,
Sleazebags, and night-crawlers
Have left the old guy feeling taken.

You don’t have to be a professor
To know that this crafty moose-dresser
In previous roles
(To meet personal goals)
Has empowered herself as transgressor.

Posted by: pinkfire | November 4, 2008 10:09 PM | Report abuse

There was a young man called Obama,
who escaped from a cave in Afghana,
he said "If I shave,
and learn to behave,
I'm sure they'll all vote for my charma."

Posted by: atomwatch | November 4, 2008 10:10 PM | Report abuse

All polls were predicting a rout

and though such data do often raise doubt

snapshots make great statistic

when the world goes ergodic

ergo dicks were tonight voted out

Posted by: DNA_Girl | November 4, 2008 10:19 PM | Report abuse

An once wise senator from Arizona
Picked as his partner a moose hunter from Alaska
He realized that his gamble had failed
But the moose hunter was too deeply embedded
By that time she had become a diva

Posted by: probashi | November 4, 2008 10:33 PM | Report abuse

It's time for a cheer and a howl

His name really ends in a vowel!

Obama’s the man

He said “Yes we Can!

Republicans, throw in the towel!

Posted by: tcushing | November 4, 2008 10:37 PM | Report abuse

From respect for our origins, hazy,
In 04 we picked one who was lazy.
His platform was a crock,
so now we love Barack,
In VA we are white, but not crazy!

Posted by: quetzalmom | November 4, 2008 10:51 PM | Report abuse

The race is nearing conclusion.
We’ve heard from all but the Aleutians.
The GOP’s broken.
The people have spoken.
Let’s start working now on solutions!

Posted by: pinkfire | November 4, 2008 11:01 PM | Report abuse

I join this party late, and thus will not attempt to outdo the brilliant zingers that have already been posted. Kudos to all! Instead, I venture to offer a more uplifting thought (?), with a nod to the limerick tradition of double-entendre:

Of the scores who essayed this contest,
Voters finally dubbed Barack the best.
Let the bickering be done,
And the healing begun!
Then in victory we all will be Blessed.*

(* For those who may not know, the English translation of "barack" is "blessed".)

Posted by: nan_lynn | November 4, 2008 11:03 PM | Report abuse

In the land of red, white and blue,
Rode a man who was black/white and new,
People questioned his range
When he named his horse "Change,"
But that steed drove him straight, drove him true.

Posted by: garyt23 | November 4, 2008 11:34 PM | Report abuse

In St. Paul her entrance: arrestin’
Then she cranked up her Bill Ayers detestin’
Tina mastered her speakin’
Fancy duds she went seekin’
T’was not quite the show she was best in

Posted by: sandyflo | November 4, 2008 11:39 PM | Report abuse

And so the deed is now done
The one has finally won
Our world feels relief
Hail to the new chief
History records a home run

Posted by: DNA_Girl | November 4, 2008 11:45 PM | Report abuse

There once was a country in pain
That experience a horrific Presidential reign
It was Twilight Zone strange
So they voted for a change
And elected Obama instead of McCain!

Posted by: jas20016 | November 4, 2008 11:56 PM | Report abuse

We have had our fill of politics
with its Joe-six-packs and mavericks
Voters turned out en masse
to save the middle class
like moose to proverbial salt licks.

Posted by: Kaysara | November 5, 2008 12:30 AM | Report abuse

Who doesn't love political gaffes?
In stressful times we all need some laughs,
but no matter who wins,
we're assured a few grins,
when VPs speak on their own behalf

Posted by: Kaysara | November 5, 2008 12:31 AM | Report abuse

Well, I had written some at work, but after reading all the witticisms posted before me, I know I can't beat this one from tgearty:

Obama Obama Obama!
Obama Obama Obama!
(Did you say McCain?
That's not the refrain!)
Obama Obama Obama!

Simple and subtle, very well done, sir or ma'am!

Posted by: Lenggries | November 5, 2008 12:42 AM | Report abuse

Obama needs some of that mojo
And so does his mate "say it ain't so Joe"
To stop those two mavs
From their Washington grabs
Mac and Sarah's DC shakeup a go-go

Posted by: posaic | November 5, 2008 12:48 AM | Report abuse

There once was a knight named Obama,
African dad, and a white Kansan momma;
He transcended race,
With his post-modern face,
(Earned a dance with the pre-mod Osama!)

Posted by: garyt23 | November 5, 2008 4:06 AM | Report abuse

Gracious winners & sore losers

The crowd cheered as Barack thanked McCain
They'd queued up to vote in the rain
But the mob there with Palin
Continued their railin'
And booed at the new Prez's name

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 5, 2008 7:46 AM | Report abuse

Barack and the Dems did so well,
Left the GOP in electoral hell
Was it Palin's twee bonhomie?
Or just the economy?
Or perhaps just last week's SNL?

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 5, 2008 7:52 AM | Report abuse

At long last we've finally elected
One who once would have sure been rejected
It took us a while
yet we did it in style
'cause we're smarter than Limbaugh expected.

Posted by: cbay64 | November 5, 2008 11:11 AM | Report abuse


Campaign 2008

Obama rode forth from his garrison,
While McCain menaced the Saracen.
Biden his time,
Barack made his climb.
McCain was Palin comparison.

David Cohen

Posted by: dcohen2 | November 5, 2008 1:22 AM

Posted by: dcohen2 | November 5, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

Her campai'n founderin' and derailin',
she wasn't phased to find they were trailin',
'08 was for vettin'
it's on '12 she was bettiin'
cuz Sarah needs a G to be palin'.

Posted by: postmichael | November 5, 2008 11:49 AM | Report abuse

P.S.:

It's all over now but the shouting.
Sarah and John must be pouting.
George is annoyed
And Joe's overjoyed
With Barack's historical routing.

Posted by: ajmayhew | November 5, 2008 12:15 PM | Report abuse

The man whose name was Barack
Said he'd get us out of Iraq
But the economy went in the tank
McCain-Palin floundered and sank
Now Obama captains the Ship of State from the dock

Posted by: smithvi | November 5, 2008 12:43 PM | Report abuse

Who won this baby?

Posted by: JackTar1 | November 5, 2008 1:11 PM | Report abuse

When McCain chose to court Annie Oakley
Many thought it was only a joke-y
But while they mocked the cred
Of Betty Boop on a sled
She said with a wink, "Okey-dokey!"

Posted by: RhapsodyRose | November 5, 2008 5:10 PM | Report abuse

There once was a woman named Palin
Whose loss set her kinfolk to wailin'
It wasn't the 'lection
That caused all the vex'tion
Their duds got returned in a mailin'.

Posted by: ZacDenver | November 5, 2008 6:05 PM | Report abuse

Divided a country we be,
But I think that we all can agree
That Barack is the man
With the vision and plan
(And mo' money for ads on TV!).

Posted by: PDVN | November 5, 2008 6:22 PM | Report abuse

Apparently it was me JackTar!!!!

Posted by: busstopboxer | November 6, 2008 8:14 AM | Report abuse

In crisis, Obama looked steady,
Yet his rivals said he was unready
Though Clinton and McCain
Yelled it time and again
His supporters yelled back, "Si, se puede!"

Posted by: gezi | November 8, 2008 3:21 PM | Report abuse

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