Boys Who Sing Like Little Girls Are Kings Of 'The Hills'

Like Afroman says: Because I sing high!(Lois Raimondo/TWP)

"I sing like a little girl." - James Blunt, at the 9:30 club, 3/13/06

That, he does!

When I reviewed the doe-eyed one's show last year, I noted that there was an upper-register pandemic in popular music, where sensitive-guy pop-rock artists were finding success by singing romantic if lachrymose lyrics in effeminate falsettos and head voice.

Not much has changed in the 21 months since, if the season finale of "The Hills" is at all representative.

Now, before you think I've completely lost my mind (and, of course, my impeccable taste), you should know that I'm not a fan of the MTV series. Not even close. In fact, I've never watched a single episode of the show. But L. Freedom likes "The Hills" (guilty pleasure, she says; though I kinda thought that was her excuse for being a "Gossip Girls" groupie). Anyway, she was watching the finale while I was trolling online for Led Zeppelin set lists - and I was struck by not only how much music the show featured, but whose songs were being used.

The first segment was a doozy: Immediately after Natasha Bedingfield's theme, "Unwritten," faded out, the Last Goodnight's "Pictures of You" came on. Kurtis John doesn't sing super-high, but he isn't exactly Barry White, either.

After the song, that Heidi chick lamented: "Like, I gave up everything for him."

Then: Maroon 5's "Nothing Lasts Forever." Adam Levine - clearly part of the problem.

Lauren groused to Whitney about getting hosed out of going to France. Lauren was on the verge of tears. I was giggling.

Cue James Blunt's "Same Mistake." Not to quote my own writing - but, okay, to quote my own writing: "Don't hate James Blunt because he's beautiful. Hate him because he sounds like his underwear is three sizes too small."

Spencer tells his sister about his fight with Heidi. "You've gotta send her an email or something," says sis.

Paolo Nutini's "Rewind." Pandemic in full effect. (Also: Somehow, I suspect I'm not in the target demo for this show. Too old and too male.)

More Lauren grousing.

A "Rewind" coda

End of segment.

Can't wait until next season. I think Coldplay should have a new album ready by then.

By J. Freedom du Lac |  December 12, 2007; 8:30 AM ET TV Music
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I think Chris Martin's voice is too deep for them. He's certainly not a falsetto. I don't even think he's an alto.

Paolo Nutini? Really? I saw him back at V Fest and I could swear he was drunk on stage. They want that on The Hills? Maybe that's a self-answering question...

Posted by: EricS | December 12, 2007 10:48 AM

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