Britney Being Britney Is an Expensive Endeavor; Bob Dylan Was a Teen Poet, Don't You Know It?



Headlines: Oh, the price of fame. Britney Spears spent around $10 million over 11 months in 2008, on assistants, a Malibu beach house, personal grooming, child support and such. She paid $3.6 million to an army of attorneys and $447,633 on bodyguards and other security measures. Oh, and $3,400 on Christmas decorations and $5,840 to have her Christmas lights removed. Yup, stars: Just like us, y'all. ... MTV knows what you've been thinking ever since you heard that a rapper by the name of Dolla was shot and killed at a Los Angeles mall: "Who Was Dolla?" ... America is getting ready to ignore Blur again. It's a shame, really; "Parklife" was flat-out fantastic. ... A poem written by Bob Dylan back when he was still a teenager known as Bobby Zimmerman is going up for auction next month. The hand-written piece, "Little Buddy," is about Dylan's teddy bear collection. Just kidding; it's about the murder of a boy's dog. It's apparently from 1957, when Dylan was a 16-year-old attending a Jewish summer camp in Wisconsin. "He was such a lovely doggy/And to me he was such fun/But today as we played by the way/A drunken man got mad at him/Because he barked in joy/He beat him and he's dying here today," etc. Okay, so it's not exactly "Visions of Johanna." ... The hits (and misses) kept on coming from Canadian musician Gonzales, who set a world record on Sunday (and Monday, and Tuesday) by playing a show that lasted 27 hours, three minutes and 44 seconds -- which was just barely longer than that interminable Smashing Pumpkins show at the 9:30 club two years ago. "I remember a guy who put 143 cigarettes in his mouth," Gonzales said. "It was purposeless, but he was the only one to do it." ... The forecast in space is calling for "Ocean Rain." Yep, the 1984 album by Echo and the Bunnymen. It's a favorite of NASA astronaut Timothy Korpa's, who plans to take the album on his next mission. Says Ian McCulloch: "I cannot wait to hear from Tim what it is like to listen to 'The Killing Moon' in the actual glow of the moon." ... And here I thought that listening to Eminem's new album was torture. Turns out, his stuff has been used in actual torture situations. Bruce Springsteen's, Metallica's, Christina Aguilera's and the theme from "Sesame Street," too. Now, human rights activists want Em and the Boss to join their campaign against music as torture. ...Teen shooter: "Hail Marilyn Manson." ... Because it worked out so well for Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Love Hewitt might be gearing up to try her hand (and other body parts) in country music. ... Sugarland's Jennifer Nettles and Kristian Bush might want to clear some space in their trophy rooms in advance of Country Music Television's upcoming awards show.


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I'm not saying that I endorse the idea, but Just Kait may be on the verge of Big Things in the pop space. She's a teen who sings, plays a bunch of instruments and writes catchy mall-punk songs, and she already has a relationship with MTV, having done the theme for one of their shows that I've never watched. You've been warned.

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By J. Freedom du Lac |  May 20, 2009; 8:24 AM ET Morning Mix
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