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Share your stories of the best and worst Facebook connections

Facebook is about to hit 500 million users and chances are you are already on it.

We want to hear your best -- the good and the bad -- connection stories on Facebook. Have you reconnected with family members on the social networking site? Have you been found, unfortunately, by an old flame who doesn't quite understand that fire was put out years ago? Did you find romance there or a new business opportunity? If not a story about connecting, feel free to tell us anything else of the cool, weird and awesome you've experience on Facebook.

Comment here so we can share your stories too. We'll be watching and will choose the best few entries to publish in The Washington Post newspaper. (Disclosure: Post Co. Chairman Donald E. Graham is a member of Facebook's board.)

Fire away!

By Cecilia Kang  |  July 19, 2010; 5:00 PM ET
 
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Comments

I'm a former MySpace user and reconnected with an ex on that site. Our messages there didn't last long, so I figured he just wanted to see how I was doing and then get back to life-after-us.

Fast forward to now, 4 years later, when he found me on Facebook. When he mentioned disappearing from the MySpace community, I asked why it happened. It turns out his son read our messages on MySpace about whether or not we would meet up for coffee over Christmas holiday. The kid assumed his dad was cheating on his wife with me and changed my ex's profile to Hello Kitty (?!?). I doubt we'll keep in touch now, but apparently not a holiday goes by without them exchanging something related to Hello Kitty. It seems my memory will live on through a terrible, dated character.

Posted by: beverhart8 | July 19, 2010 10:47 AM | Report abuse

I used facebook for 2 or three months and found that most of what was via it was innane NONSENSE!

self-indulgent twaddle spewed forth ... non-stop ... by boring morons collecting "friends"

what a crock ...

Posted by: edbaker1 | July 19, 2010 10:58 AM | Report abuse

Personally I think the value of Facebook is grossly overstated. I use facebook primarily to keep track of family members and a few close friends. I deleted a number of other "friends" who didn't think it was possible to share too much or too often. I haven't made any new connections through Facebook and continue to rely for the most part on "old" technology - e-mail and cell phone.

Posted by: ikeaboy | July 19, 2010 11:15 AM | Report abuse

I used Facebook a few years ago but had to delete the account. Someone from my high school found me (I had no recollection of this person) and began bombarding me daily with religious messages and tokens. I made my faith clear on my profile yet, despite repeated requests for her to cease and desist, she continued to express her "need" to "save" me. Along with the rest of the inane content of the site, I found it all too much hassle for so few meaningful connections. My "friends" know where to find me and it's not on Facebook.

Posted by: Mea5 | July 19, 2010 11:16 AM | Report abuse

I was contacted by a grade-school chum whose demise had been greatly exaggerated. We'd gone to different high schools and lost touch. I moved away. When I returned many years later, the word was that Todd had died in a motorcycle accident. Some even said he plowed into a bus. Believing that to be a provincial myth (and a bit melodramatic), I nevertheless doubted I would ever see him again or discover what had really happened.

Until he contacted me on Facebook a few months ago. At first I thought he was another friend with a similar name. But the confusion in his replies prompted me to reconsider. I was dumbfounded, then ecstatic when I realized which Todd had contacted me.

Turns out he works in the same general area as me. We keep trying to get together for a beer, but jobs and family keep our schedules apart. Still, there's something comforting about reconnecting with a piece of your past you thought lost forever.

Posted by: dtdbiz | July 19, 2010 11:32 AM | Report abuse

It is a great way for Facebook to obtain the name, email address and a ton of habits, likes and cross-connections between people.

Posted by: Hawaiian_Gecko | July 19, 2010 11:33 AM | Report abuse

I have found Facebook a nice addition to my support system. Mea5, all you needed to do was "defriend" that person who inundated you with religious messages and "ignore" any messages she/he sent directly to you. I "defriended" a few people who were just using up my FB space. I have only 30 "friends" I enjoy sharing messages with. I have turned down friend requests from people I do not know.
FB is a nice way to chat with a circle of friends whereas calling them on the phone or sending emails directly to them may put more pressure on them to interact with me when it may not be convenient to do so. Someone described FB as being at a party with friends and just wandering around talking with various friends at the party. If one conversation doesn't do anything for you, wander over to another discussion.
FB has enabled me to stay in touch with people I may have lost otherwise. My posts range from comments on the weather to sharing news links that were meaningful to me, especially political news. One of my "friends" is the husband of a friend who died suddenly 2 weeks after the birth of their first child. He has many friends he sees on a regular basis but is also able to share everyday experiences in caring for a baby on his own. These are the types of sharing one may do automatically if one has an engaged partner living with them. Not all of us have that. When my daughter was born, I was living with her unengaged father. I wish FB had been available then.

Posted by: Observer10 | July 19, 2010 11:37 AM | Report abuse

FB is a terrific advertising tool, primarily for promoting one's ego. Hundreds of virtual friends? It's sad, really.

Posted by: steve601 | July 19, 2010 11:38 AM | Report abuse

Facebook can destroy real friendships if users don't resist the narcissistic lure of social networking. A former best friend became so addicted to eliciting positive comments on her looks, clothing, etc. on Facebook that it led her to snub real friends who didn't always have the time or interest to post on her Facebook page...a phone call from me to ask how she was doing and sending good wishes her way meant NOTHING to her unless I posted the same affirmations on her Facebook page for all to see.

In talking to other people who have become disillusioned with Facebook, I've found this is not an uncommon occurrence. Friends have told me they feel it starts becoming like high school, with everyone fishing for compliments. The only real way to 'win' is not to play, I think.

Genuine friendships can get lost in the frenzy to chalk up the largest amount of positive comments. It has its uses, but basically Facebook appeals to narcissists who use it as a tool to garner praise for their supposed superiority over the rest of us.

Posted by: Irish_Sunglasses | July 19, 2010 11:54 AM | Report abuse

I found out about the death of a former college roommate & sorority sister in April of 1999 when I reconnected with my sorority sisters via facebook. It is a strange way to find out such sad news. It left me disconnected and wanting more.

Posted by: lydandy | July 19, 2010 11:58 AM | Report abuse

I follow radio stations on it to get information on various events are happening around the area. It's also good for logging into web sites for posting with.

It's reputation for the abuse of posters privacy stops me from posting ANY personal information to it. Shoot, i've seen articles where people follow you on facebook to figure out the clues to your passwords so they can hack you. whither you are taking a vacation, so they can rob you.

I like twitter much better. No, I don't post to it. But I do follow news media sites, sports teams, blogging sites, and a few sports personalities. I am able to follow breaking information right as soon as its posted by following these sites on twitter.

Posted by: LiberalBasher | July 19, 2010 12:13 PM | Report abuse

I think it is great for sharing photos, and keeping up with friends who otherwise are hard to get hold of, but there is too much blather, and Farmville type crap. I'm on the fence on whether I'll keep it going for me.

Posted by: tojo45 | July 19, 2010 12:20 PM | Report abuse

The name and interest in Facebook amuse me. I wonder how many of the 500 million ever bury their faces in a serious book? Because of things like Facebook, I suspect that fewer and fewer people have face time with anything significant and enlightening.

Posted by: DWSouthern | July 19, 2010 12:27 PM | Report abuse

In grade school, I met a cute little girl that I really liked, we were good friends, but had our separate group of friends, she was one year older than me, so often I was not invited to the same gatherings, school functions, etc. as we entered High School, we grew apart, and went our separate ways. Almost 20 years later, I found her again in Facebook, we started talking every day through email, and then on the phone, we quickly made plans for me to make the 3 hour drive to visit with her. On this visit I fell in love with her all over again, we dated long distance for almost 5 months, each time we parted it was harder and harder so to say goodbye, shortly after I transferred jobs within my company, we lived together, and by the end of that year we were engaged. We are now married and working on our first child together. We love each other very much, and thankful that there was a Facebook to bring us back together.
I have since disabled my Facebook page, over the privacy concerns, and over the direction that the site has started to take, my wife and I do not agree on this issue, but I am still thankful for the one very positive change it has had on my life.

Posted by: chazeb | July 19, 2010 12:33 PM | Report abuse

Not connected at all, don't have Facebook. I have a life and real friends who don't care what I do every 30 minutes, only we get together, in person (how weird, isn't it?).

My only concession is Linkedin, that's for professional reasons of course.

Posted by: eaglestrk01 | July 19, 2010 12:54 PM | Report abuse

What a bunch of prudes commenting here. Geez.

Posted by: jamalnasir_2000 | July 19, 2010 1:39 PM | Report abuse

Facebook is a "time-wasting cesspool of pseudo communications".

Posted by: adrienne_najjar | July 19, 2010 1:56 PM | Report abuse

I still use Facebook and enjoy it, but I have maximized all my privacy settings and completly removed all of my "info" except my email. I did this when I heard horror stories and learned that the CEO is an immature weenie who doesn't like the concept of privacy, he thinks that's stupid and old school. So far nothing bad has happened. If it does, I'm out of there.

Posted by: Grandblvd03 | July 19, 2010 2:49 PM | Report abuse

FB is suckes

Posted by: mha31353 | July 19, 2010 2:49 PM | Report abuse

I don't use Face, Linked, or any of those non-social "social pages." Never have, never will. Hell, I don't get enough calls on my land line to get a cell

Posted by: tkavanag | July 19, 2010 2:52 PM | Report abuse

I'm generally on facebook several hours a day, and I enjoy playing games on there. I interact with my friends much more frequently (I am terrible at returning phone calls) by commenting on their status messages or by posting news myself. Events between groups of friends are easier to organize. My husband and I have reconnected with a whole group of friends we thought lost to us forever through the site, and that is just priceless.

I also have people in my friend list exclusively to play facebook games with. I maintain friend lists for each game (pretty easy once you get it set up), and lock the privacy so they can't see all my personal information and photos. I also maintain what shows up in my feed. Farmville is hidden for instance, so I don't have to see anything about barn raisings or lost cows. If I see any app on there I don't play or don't find appropriate, I simply hide it or block it. This group isn't allowed to view photos anymore due to one creepy individual who kept trying to chat with "his favorite milf." PSA: That is not an appropriate response to someone's recent wedding photo. He was deleted, and the photos were locked for anyone I haven't met in person. I've had no problems since.

Any website you interact with (especially Google) tracks your activity and sells it to advertisers or uses it to customize the site and ad content. Facebook is no different. I don't give them a lot of personal information (like my phone number or real birthdate) that I would be unhappy to have shared.

Posted by: MoftheMountain | July 19, 2010 3:03 PM | Report abuse

Facebook, just because 500 millions of lemmings (err...."users") do it, doesn't mean it is ok, unless you want you privacy evaporate.

What?, did you really think Facebook cares about your privacy?, not at all, they make you think you can block this and that then you are good to go but the good folks at Facebook are milking every single piece of personal data for other purposes (you are not supposed to know this, so keep posting about your latest shennanigans), if you don't believe me ask one of the many corporate lawyers Facebook has.

In the meantime, keep posting your pictures, what you did two minutes ago, what you really think about your imaginary friends, when are you going on vacations, when you took a dump, etc, etc, thousands of hackers, burglars and pervs will thank you.

Posted by: eaglestrk01 | July 19, 2010 3:16 PM | Report abuse

I live in a small town in Central Illinois. About two years ago, I joined the Facebook craze - although then, it was a "fad"...
Within minutes, I was connected with people I had gone to school with, and it snowballed from there.
Class reunions were planned through Facebook, and we ended up reuniting a whole township - even those that had moved to different coasts and countries.
People we shared life-changing events with, grew up with, and changed because of are now back in our lives. Sharing the escapades of THEIR children. Some sharing the same teachers, coaches, and instructors that we had growing up.
We have mourned the loss of icons in our small town, supported and prayed for our dear friends who lost family members - parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, who - once upon a time - use to give us cold drinks on hot days, and treat our cuts and scrapes as we played in their front yards.
I've seen some negative comments here, and it surprises me. Yet, with 500 million members?? You folks are the odd men out.
Thank you, Facebook. For bringing a small town back together in a BIG way!!
JRH - Chillicothe, IL. GO GHOSTS!!!

Posted by: jrhackler66 | July 19, 2010 3:25 PM | Report abuse

I have had my Facebook account for about a year. I don't spend huge amounts of time on the website. Recently I received a friend request. I've learned to check which friend we have in common. From that I was able to infer that this friend request came from a member of my high school class from 41 years ago. I did some additional research and located a database that someone has built containing over half of our graduating class of 600.

Searching through that database provided me with the contact information of one of my high school friends that I had lost contact with. We have been catching up via email and phone. Thus, I agree that Facebook can be a useful means of staying in touch with old friends.

Posted by: Dr_Gene_Nelson | July 19, 2010 3:55 PM | Report abuse

I use facebook to stay in touch with people I wouldnt otherwise. I spend maybe 30 minutes a day on there but its nice to see what people are up to and send them a message every once in a while. I have a lot of friends that I would not want to pick up the phone and have a full blown conversation with but I do like to occasionally hang out with. I have also had friends that I previously would barely talk to and now hang out with all the time.

There is no reason for all the hate directed at facebook. There are a lot of features on there that I think are dumb (farmville for one). Guess what? I dont use them. Amazing concept! And as far as the privacy goes, if you are worried about it then dont post that much information. Its up to you how much you put out there.

Posted by: LaxBuddy21 | July 19, 2010 3:55 PM | Report abuse

Maybe I'm just getting old, but I don't get it. I signed up for it and it just seems pointless. I already communicate with friends and family by phone and email--Facebook doesn't seem to add anything to that.

Posted by: nuzuw | July 19, 2010 4:10 PM | Report abuse

A person would have to be insane to hand their personal info over to these hustlers.

Posted by: ravenmocker | July 19, 2010 4:43 PM | Report abuse

I'm getting old too, but that did not stop me from finding a gem of a friend that I thought was lost after 30 years, and he's nearby my home. Facebook enables a conversation among people who are not in my email or "friends" and increases political discourse with my congressman and his constituents. Finally, for those who actually post, it gives me insight into their daily lives from a distance.

Posted by: jneumerski | July 19, 2010 5:32 PM | Report abuse

I've been on FB for about a year ... it's about getting snippets of what people are thinking and doing (you can block Farmville, Mafia Wars etc). It helps as a conversation started for people you see regularly, and for your teenage nieces/nephews who say 'Fine' when you ask how they are. When something reminds you of someone, you can post a message to them, and they know you're thinking of them.

Posted by: LAGirl1 | July 19, 2010 5:33 PM | Report abuse

I connected with some old Navy buddies and high school classmates. I had a friends list of 85(small by Face book standards). I recently cut it down to 45. I still have about 40 friends too many. Honestly, the people that took the time to stay in touch simply did it. These site connections turn you into an email address with a picture. I grew weary of hearing folks talk about nothing. Any substantive conversation made people uncomfortable or was ignored. I now know why I never stayed in touch with most of these people: We are not friends".

Posted by: rcvinson64 | July 19, 2010 5:47 PM | Report abuse

I've reconnected with an old friend that I hadn't seen in 7 years. The only girl that I really wanted to ask out in high school (that I had been thinking about recently) contacted me out of the blue!

My cousin reconnected with her niece that she wanted to stay in touch with because of family issues.

I get to see photos of the children of my friends who live in New Zealand and Australia with whom I spent many a great time with.

I stay in contact with a good friend in Serbia that keeps inviting me to visit.

I could keep going on....

Posted by: cmecyclist | July 19, 2010 5:51 PM | Report abuse

I keep in touch with family and friends via Facebook. I've met people around the world who have bonded around one of the Facebook games. (And until FB figures out a way to better manage game messages, remember you can hide spam from games and applications you don't use.)

What concerns me, though, is that Facebook is high-handed and punitive with users. I can't even count up the number of people I know who have had their accounts suspended or even revoked because they did "too much" networking. Seriously. Chat too much, send too many PMs, post on too many group walls, and you risk punishment. That's fine when applied to spammers who are hassling people they don't know. But I'm talking about adults interacting with their friends in innocuous ways. What concerns me is that users have virtually no recourse. There is no appeal system, no explanation, and no groundrules to help people avoid punishment in the first place. Given the central role FB is playing in people's lives this is creepy... especially combined with their bizarre and ever changing privacy rules.

Personally, I've taken the time to learn and use the privacy controls. But, the majority of users don't and are revealing far more than they realize to the world.

So, all in all, I love connecting with friends and staying in touch via Facebook. But, I am unsettled by the huge amount of personal info they control, their cavalier approach to privacy, and by their heavy-handed tactics with users. And yet, like 500 million other people, I'm still there.

Posted by: LynnDeanne | July 19, 2010 5:54 PM | Report abuse

I am a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer, and my host family tracked me down via Facebook 15 years after we had essentially lost touch. It's wonderful to see photos of my African 'papa' and my sisters and their children, and a bit challenging to remember my rusty French!

Posted by: mnsarai | July 19, 2010 5:54 PM | Report abuse

FB is what you make of it. Privacy concerns are legitimate, but if you keep up with them, you can keep yourself as private as you want to be.

I have a handful of FB friends, and they are all pretty much actual friends (there are a couple of relatives who wouldn't stop friend-requesting me). But I still don't post anything of substance, upload only pictures of my dog, and have blocked almost all applications. I don't even have my own picture up as a profile pic.

The nice thing about FB has been reconnecting with old friends that I had lost track of over the years. It's been nice to see what everyone is up to.

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | July 19, 2010 6:56 PM | Report abuse

My childhood best friend found me on FB and now we talk daily.

Posted by: blakesouthwood | July 19, 2010 7:12 PM | Report abuse

My best...chatting with a friend in Dominican Republic live time and it didn't cost a penney. Boggles my mind..I can remember crank phones. I have seen just amazing advances in my lifetime. Keeping up with them keeps me young. Victoria, Clovis, CA

Posted by: sewgran | July 19, 2010 7:40 PM | Report abuse

My best experience -- I have a friend from Alaska, and a friend from New York. One day, they each responded to a post I made. From there, they recognized each other -- they had shared a class (and ride-share) while attending Clemson University! It was great to watch them catch up. (I just wonder what they have told each other about me...)

Posted by: strausssean | July 19, 2010 7:51 PM | Report abuse

Facebook is not free. You pay a very heavy price in giving FB all of your information in the most personal way. Oh, but you think that's OK when they "help" you by sending ads your way about products you will be interested in? What about when you share something real, like the loss of a loved one and FB runs it's algorithms on you and targets you and your family for life insurance products? Would you let someone record your phone conversation, make you part of a pie chart and sell useless junk back to you? I enjoyed having a FB account for the many reason stated by people here. But I killed it once I realized their true business model. I would much rather pay a small monthly subscription to keep my privacy and not promote this Lord of the Clouds to aggregate all of my personal data. More like FaceSuck. Goodbye identity! The more we think all of the information on the web is free the faster we will destroy the creative middle class.

Posted by: meade11 | July 19, 2010 7:58 PM | Report abuse

I am 58 years old, a professor, not really a cutting edge online/computing kind of guy. Two nieces, both in their 20s, urged me to get on Facebook. I did so 18 months ago and I like it. I have additional communications with and knowledge of certain family members and friends, especially those under the age of about 35. I haven't found it burdensome to set "privacy" settings to a maximum, so only my 50 or so "friends" can access info about me. Some of my current or past students are "friends" on FB, which is not a problem because I wouldn't be posting intimate or embarrassing information, anyway. But they do get to see a less formal, more joking and personal side of me. I also like it as a way of sharing photos of what's going on in our lives. Still, I'm not unhappy with friends/family who've chosen not to go on FB. I think the "pro" and "con" advocates re: FB tend toward extremism. Count me as a moderate enthusiast.

Posted by: sistererasma | July 19, 2010 7:59 PM | Report abuse

Apparently Ms. Kang's post was written on an Apple computer, since it contains an infinite loop linking this post with the one about Facebook's growing pains. Both the "previous" link and "next" link are identical for both posts.

Must have been programmed by someone from Facebook tech support...

Posted by: 54Stratocaster | July 19, 2010 8:20 PM | Report abuse

Facebook is a great way to advertise! We have a page for our campany maxbidder.com. Check us out http://www.maxbidder.com

Posted by: MAXBIDDER | July 19, 2010 8:26 PM | Report abuse

I think Facebook is a good vehicle to keep in contact with old friends. One needs always to be acutely aware of the privacy issues and not use it for intimate postings. But that goes for much of online activities. If one uses it as in the manner it was intended, then it is great fun. See what other friends are doing, post photos, and share general information. It is simply for people to stay connected to one another.

Posted by: RDSpeer | July 19, 2010 8:36 PM | Report abuse

A few months ago, I looked up my step-sister-in-law who I had lost contact with over the years. She was like an older sister when I was 9-10 years old & there were tons of wonderful memories including the time when she & my step-brother took me snipe hunting.

I found a few people with the same name as her's & sent a message to the one who I suspected was her. The message read "Is this the same Diane who lived in Manassas in the 70s? If so, what was the name of your dog?"

She replied "my dog's name was Mud." That was it! We reconnected online & on the phone. I found out that my long lost step-brother had passed away the previous December. Sad to hear that news, but so glad we reconnected via FB.

Posted by: Myshamrock_va@yahoo.com | July 19, 2010 9:09 PM | Report abuse


I am and old timer and my sister sent me a link which shows me how to correctly use facebook. I have read some of the information but there are a lot of things that really confuse me. I will attempt to learn more but I am going to take counsel with the comment made by Mea5. I really am looking for a couple of people but as far as advise, no thank you. My retirement, wife and children will sustain me.


Posted by: mortified469 | July 19, 2010 9:18 PM | Report abuse

Two words: "Ekim Snrub"

Pretty funny stuff!

Posted by: mburns134 | July 19, 2010 9:36 PM | Report abuse

Digital Crack! Run for the hills.

Posted by: clark202 | July 19, 2010 9:40 PM | Report abuse

Maybe one of the reasons we had a financial crisis and recession is our newspapers and indeed our journalists are reduced to essentially producing free advertisement for products and companies.

Posted by: WillF1 | July 19, 2010 9:53 PM | Report abuse

facebook reminds me of why i stopped communicating with all those "lost" people in the first place

Posted by: alarico | July 19, 2010 10:08 PM | Report abuse

I'm a young widow with two kids at home. There aren't a lot of support groups or people who understand what it's like to have lost the love of your life before you really have gotten your life going.

I found an online bulletin board especially to support young widows, and many of the people there are on Facebook. We cheer each other up, cheer each other on. We remember each other's birthdays and wedding anniversaries -- when nobody else wants to.

No, I don't know all these people in "real life" but they offer me more strength, courage, and understanding than 99% of the people I see every day in the neighborhood and every week at church.

THANK YOU, FACEBOOK!

Posted by: Vosora | July 19, 2010 10:43 PM | Report abuse

I recently got a promotion within my current company, and was strongly advised to "eliminate" a number of connections on Facebook (of being former peers/co-workers, that I now supervised).
I decided to try the halfway point, and put many of them on a limited profile: they could see parts of my profile, but not everything.
Less than a week later, a number of "friends" began sending me angry text messages and Facebook messages, claiming that I "didn't appreciate our friendship" among other things.
I decided that many of these people were too reliant on using Facebook as the basis for their "friendships" (typically it was a 'who has more friends' type of discussion). Last week, I deactivated my Facebook account.
As a young professional entering the public relations/marketing world, it was a little out of the ordinary; however, I decided that professionalism now would hopefully yield a greater security later.
We'll see how this goes. So far, I'm not missing Facebook very much...

Posted by: conn0403 | July 20, 2010 1:17 AM | Report abuse

No personal experience with it here, privacy concerns make me uncomfortable w/ signing up.

I know that they have supposedly tightened their privacy policy,but that can change at any time.

Interesting to see so many people w/ positive experiences. Most of the experiences I have heard about have been negative, but not so much due to FB, but due to user stupidity.

Posted by: BEEPEE | July 20, 2010 1:48 AM | Report abuse

the best thing that has happened to me re Facebook is that my long lost daughter (who was born and raised in Paraguay) was able to locate me using Facebook.
We use it to "chat" for an hour or more almost every day ;)_

Posted by: markmayhew | July 20, 2010 2:36 AM | Report abuse

I moved out of the US just over a year ago and find Facebook invaluable for staying in touch with friends and family back home, sharing photos, etc - I think it's a lot of fun and a great, easy way to maintain ties. Periodically, I re-evaluate my friends list and prune as necessary. Sounds cruel, but there have been a lot of people I went to high school with or knew many years ago who found me on FB, we friended each other and caught up with the latest in our mutual lives and...that was it. Nice to hear from them, but I really don't know them at all and don't feel the need to remain in touch on FB. I think the very definition of "friend" on FB is vastly different than in real life and also different to every FB user. I've had a few people want to friend me whom I don't even know and I always ignore those requests. I also use the features to "hide" someone if they are a good friend but just too "chatty" on FB or if their views on religion, politics are different to mine and they are vocal about them. I have a very religious family member and I love her dearly but I don't want to be preached to, so the settings for her are different than my other friends. Again, might be cruel, but it's what I'd do in real life - find a way to love her and stay in touch, yet walk away from her religious spoutings.

Interestingly, I now have two dead friends on FB. Thankfully, FB keeps up the pages of the deceased (at least they did with my two friends) and their pages have become a wonderful place where those of us who mourn them can go to share feelings and memories or even say "hello" to the deceased! In fact, now and then, FB reminds me to "reconnect" with Deceased Person and though it was weird at first to read such a reminder, it's now kind of nice to follow through with the suggestion and stop by. There's always someone else who's also mourning and it's comforting to share the experience.

I never play any of the FB games and I "hide" my friends who have that obsession as it's annoying to always be asked for gemstones, farm animals or equipment, etc. But to each their own! I admit to an obsession of my own when I first joined FB - I was constantly checking it for status updates, etc. Eventually I found the proper place for it in my life; i.e., it's not REAL LIFE, it's just a tool for maintaining REAL connections. I'm thankful every day for FB and the way it's enabled me to reconnect and stay in touch.

Posted by: PowerPop64 | July 20, 2010 6:04 AM | Report abuse

Life is too short for Facebook.

Posted by: 44fx2901 | July 20, 2010 6:42 AM | Report abuse

I keep up with my large, extended family on Facebook. But there are a few stay-at-home-moms who monopolize it by posting every trivial detail of their lives. Kinda pitiful. But my brother sagely advised, "But that's all they have." Sigh. Aside from them, I have reconnected with people I never would have found otherwise. I check in daily, but don't waste a lot of time there.

Posted by: hrndnwmn1 | July 20, 2010 8:15 AM | Report abuse

Facebook is like a virtual cocktail party. It allows a person to stay in touch with a number of people, but not have to clean up after them. Some of the conversations are inane, but once in a while, you can stumble upon a gem.

Posted by: emillen1 | July 20, 2010 8:27 AM | Report abuse

My wife's birth family found her on MySpace, but we used Facebook to get to know them.

With so many people to get to know (aunts, uncles, cousins, and siblings), Facebook was an easy tool to send messages and share photos before we had a reunion.

Now we use it to keep up with what is going on in their lives.

Posted by: quercus7 | July 20, 2010 1:45 PM | Report abuse

I did it for fun, for awhile as I live in a neighborhood where people have large extended families and are busy with them and other things. But when it all went public I got off fast because I found so much info about me on the net. Then I spent several days reading all about the dangers of facebook, such as they have the copyright of everything on your site, which really annoyed me.

I had to get back on to talk to someone whom I could only access that way. I erased all of my information, which was all there like I had never been off for an hour. I even put in silly information. I got off again, and then got back on to chat with a friend. I don't use it much as it is not the best way to communicate with people. I would rather talk on the phone or in person and I do read books and do other things.
I have met old friends, including an old boyfriend, but that is about all. The main thing I like to do is share interesting Youtubes with others. There are some terriffic ones on the net. Otherwise, I spend very little time on FB as I am too interested in many other things. I do not like what I have read about the owner and his so called viewpoints that everyone wants to be less private on the net- bit joke that is. Now I am getting more spam, and ads and other things that are jamming up my email. I may get off of it again. And now it is so complex to use that it is confusing. Network wars is what it is all about and making some immature kid a trillionaire. Phooey on that.

Posted by: suemax | July 20, 2010 2:25 PM | Report abuse

Facebook has been a tremendous boon to me, both organizationally and personally.

As communications director of the Rutgers University Libraries in New Jersey, I've set up and managed our Facebook page for nearly 4 years. The Libraries Facebook page has allowed us to promote our resources and events and gain valuable feedback in ways that were not possible before.

In my own life I've used Facebook to reconnect with an uncle I'd lost touch with decades ago, as a subject for my final project in graduate school, as a way of staying in touch & sharing website links with a friend in Holland, and as a major part of my planning for trips in the US & abroad.

Posted by: hglazer | July 21, 2010 12:12 PM | Report abuse

I love Facebook!

A good friend from high school moved overseas 15 years ago (before email was ubiquitous) and I thought I would never see her again. But I found her on Facebook a couple of years ago! It turns out she'd just moved back to my area - and now we hang out on a semi-regular basis.

It's been a good way to realize that I have things in common with people. I am a fan of a cult TV show that I thought nobody else I knew watched. It turns out, a couple of my friends are also huge fans and thought nobody else watched it either! Through Facebook, we discovered that we have it in common - so it's something new for us to talk about when we hang out.

Posted by: bunnyofdoom | July 23, 2010 10:50 AM | Report abuse

Despite all of its flaws, I will always be grateful to facebook for connecting me to a great guy who is now my fiance. Despite sharing mutual acquaintances, we had never met beforehand, but we had several mutual facebook friends, so facebook sent one of us a random friend suggestion, which was followed and accepted. That led to facebook messages, which led to chats, which led to texts, then calls, then a first date. I am now happily engaged to a wonderful man whom I would never have met if facebook hadn't introduced us.

Posted by: dibs | July 23, 2010 1:58 PM | Report abuse

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