I've Heard of Cellar Dweller Teams, But This Is Ridiculous
Nats fans have had fair warning from the front office: The 2007 edition of Nationals baseball will be a stinker for the ages, an extreme version of Rebuild 1.0, as the team spends zilch on this year in hopes of fielding a semi-decent team for the '08 campaign, when the new stadium debuts.
But hardcore fans who nonetheless stay true to their team this coming season can now expect a whole new kind of reward--one that carries through even to their eternal rest:
Yes, folks, Eternal Image Inc., makers of fine custom designed caskets and urns, is proud to announce a new deal with Major League Baseball whereby you can assure yourself or loved ones of permanent season tickets in the hereafter.
"This new line of team-specific funeral products opens a whole new market for our company -- a market that is just waiting for a way to make team loyalty a 'final' statement of a great passion in their lives," says the company's chief executive, Clint Mytych.
I kid you not. We are talking Nats (or Yanks or Cubs or even, theoretically, Devil Rays) caskets and urns, carrying the names and logos of the teams you loved all your life. (Nats fans may not even need this special passage to the afterlife: My friend Vince notes that as a Nats fan, you can always be buried in last place.)
In a world where it's rarely possible anymore to go too far, this one is so fabulous, so wildly over the top that I couldn't help but pass it along.
By Marc Fisher |
December 13, 2006; 12:19 PM ET
Previous: The 30 Days of Xmas Shotgun and Rifle Raffle | Next: Adventures in Customer Service: Your DC Gov't At Work
Please email us to report offensive comments.
Posted by: COD | December 13, 2006 1:08 PM
Posted by: R.I.P. | December 13, 2006 2:03 PM
Posted by: Anonymous | December 13, 2006 2:51 PM
Posted by: KK | December 13, 2006 3:08 PM
Posted by: Not! | December 13, 2006 3:21 PM
Posted by: northzax | December 14, 2006 10:25 AM
The comments to this entry are closed.