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Guest Column

2006-2007 Holiday Redskins Wishlist


Ho, ho, ho, ya'll. Happy Holiday greetings from your homie, AEE. With the exception of fights in the crowd I've seen at the Dallas and Atlanta games (lower bowl) this season. I believe us Skins fans have been good and hope that Danny-clause will bring us this following.

1. A quiet offseason filled with blue collar free agents and small signing bonuses.
2. New jumbotrons in either endzone. The replays come slowly, and the picture stinks! For the 30% hike in tickets this year, I think Danny-Clause can afford to upgrade those suckers before next season. You can run ads on those screens too (I hope you won't though).
3. An end to the non-stop attempts to sell jerseys and other junk on the team website. I don't want to buy a Lexus, ESPECIALLY now that their ad ran before the Gibbs' presser where he called Brunell super-smart. There is a place for that, its called the online store.
4. The firing of Larry Michael. Can you think of a fanbase who dislikes their play by play guy more than we dislike Larry? You won't find one! After what he pulled at his previous job, throwing co-workers and employers under the bus. Then firing Frank. He needs to go. We'll NEVER like you Larry. NEVER.
5. Let Larry carry Vinny's bags on the way out. We need that office space. (See #6)
6. A full time GM who answers to Danny-Clause! I hear a new office opened up.
7. Serious cutting of fat from the roster. Even if it means a cap hit in 07. I'm not kidding. Arch Deluxe, Holdman, Wright, Fauria, etc.
8. The end of the Bush Admin style of information manipulation. Cut ties with Extremeskins, get out of the bad signal radio biz. Just run the damn team. The fans know what you're doing. Your shows on XXX just stink. Riggins is decent, but the rest is awful.
9. Extend the Green Lot a few rows. The Orange is nearly empty before kickoff, and you have people overpaying at Our Holy Church of Overpriced Parking.
10. Peace on Earth

By Jason La Canfora  |  December 15, 2006; 3:00 PM ET
 
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Comments

Is this for real?

Posted by: bigstonegap | December 15, 2006 3:05 PM | Report abuse

I just want a refridgerator with a pad lock on it and huge pectoral muscles like JM220.

In all seriousness I'd settle for #6.

Posted by: Skinz | December 15, 2006 3:10 PM | Report abuse

Oh and grats to Fabio. World Soccer's Player of the Year.

Posted by: Skinz | December 15, 2006 3:18 PM | Report abuse

Hey guys,

I can't find the video link for the interview at

http://www.nola.com/abc26/video/link/files.html#

Can someone help?

Posted by: charlie | December 15, 2006 3:27 PM | Report abuse

Spot on AEE

Posted by: Hoss | December 15, 2006 3:29 PM | Report abuse

I keep seeing these stories about Portis now being expendable? Let the guy mend, keep him fresh and safe during preseason and let him run the rock. He is the heart and soul of the Skins and when he's on the field and healthy, he's productive. All I have to look forward to now is the release of Archuletta, Holdman, Wright, Fauria and Salavea & Daniels can get the boot too.

Posted by: G$ | December 15, 2006 3:29 PM | Report abuse

The name AEE has me asking, who dat? Antwaan Edgar El? Do you post under another name sometimes?

Good work on the wishlist. I think you captured the gist of what most of us want for the team -- but don't expect from this owner -- this offseason.

Posted by: Nate in the PDX | December 15, 2006 3:30 PM | Report abuse

charlie, go to http://www.nola.com/abc26/

down the left side, look for VIDEO ARCHIVE. I see "Redskins fans help rebuild New Orleans" as the second link in that list.

Posted by: Nate in the PDX | December 15, 2006 3:33 PM | Report abuse

who the hell is AEE???? Good ideas anyway

Posted by: Chris Larry | December 15, 2006 3:40 PM | Report abuse

I just want my parade. And if its not coming this year, don't lie to me and tell me that it is because then I will be mad at you. I want my parade. I want to take the day off of work and go to the National Mall and watch JJG hold the Lombardi Trophy aloft and tell us all that we did it.

I want to walk around the city with my 'WORLD CHAMPIONS' hat on. I want to dance and sing the fightsong 1000 times as I drink scrapwrenches from the time I wake up until I pass out 4 days later.

Why can't I have that? I've waited for so long.

Posted by: ArtMonkToTheSticks | December 15, 2006 3:41 PM | Report abuse

AMTTS, I choked up a little bit reading your post. That parade is what we ALL really want, dammit. But we're so parched from these years wandering in the desert of mediocrity that we're grasping for smaller things, little steps, any sign that we're finally on the path to glory.

Posted by: Nate in the PDX | December 15, 2006 3:46 PM | Report abuse

Here, here. Agreed on all fronts. Especially with the D. Bag Michael.

The size of the purple lot is a bigger concern than the orange for me personally (probably because I park in orange). Usually a half hour before kick-off the purple lot is over half empty, and at this point they start funneling all parking passes into the purple lot (green, red, etc.). The orange lot used to be two rows closer to the stadium (as evidenced by the orange flag poles in the purple lot), but they have moved the jersey walls out so they can accommodate more high priced purple lot spaces (a great number of which never even get used).

Posted by: DCLance | December 15, 2006 3:48 PM | Report abuse

Parade would be nice, but I will just take a scrappy prideful team that is playing for something the last three weeks of everfy season...

Posted by: Chris Larry | December 15, 2006 3:54 PM | Report abuse

Here's who you get rid of:

1) Adam Archuleta- this is a "no-brainer"
2) Warrick Holdman
3) Andre Carter- but draft a replacement with your 1st rounder
4) Christian Faurier- He's younger

Here's who you keep

1) Clinton Portis- A two back system can work a la Riggins/Washington

2) Carlos Rogers- judgement day should be by game 4 of next season. It's too early to tell now.

3) Declare Jason Campbell the absolute starter going into next year. Mark Brunell is clear #2

4) What sbout Fred Smoot? He was benched in Minnesota. Bring him back???

Posted by: sicwidit | December 15, 2006 4:01 PM | Report abuse

Nate,

I found it but my computer won't open up the registration box large enough to put my sex (hee, hee, hee!) so that I can see the video.

Posted by: charlie | December 15, 2006 4:04 PM | Report abuse

Being benched doesn't mean you're being cut. That's ES idiot talk. That's why I show up there and let folks know how it is on the inside. So learning disabled fans who post on the Official Website of the Washington Redskins can be corrected for their stupid opinions.

Posted by: ANDYMAN | December 15, 2006 4:09 PM | Report abuse

What is wrong with extremeskins.com? Come post there a bit JLC

Posted by: Ismail | December 15, 2006 4:10 PM | Report abuse

sicwitit - Andre Carter!?! Why would you get rid of him now, just when it seems that he is starting to play well.

oh, forgot, we are talking about the Redskins.

Posted by: BT | December 15, 2006 4:12 PM | Report abuse

as the Czabe put it so nicely,
They are all a bunch of morons at Extremeskins.com

Posted by: Sir Donkey Punch | December 15, 2006 4:12 PM | Report abuse

Karl Rove is to George Bush as ExtremeSkins is to _______?

Posted by: BT | December 15, 2006 4:15 PM | Report abuse

Oh!Oh!Oh! Young Jason....You almost had Crazy....er Danny Claus at small signing bonuses. But no, you had to throw in a gratuitous slap with that Bush administration comparison. Sure, it's been a rough week, what with stair surfing, drywall puncturing and closet deterioration going on at your house. But Santa Danny doesn't care and he's marking you down on the lump o' coal side of the ledger.

But not just any lump of coal! No, this specially crafted anthracite treasure comes from our private mine (thereby avoiding any pesky state and federal environmental oversight) and is shaped into a perfect 3D rendition of the warrior's head that adorns the team's helmets. Your coal will be mounted on a polished granite base inscribed with the names of every Redskins coach and player who has been on a victorious Super Bowl team since I became the owner. (Inscribed at no additional cost to you!)

Yes, Jason, you'll want to be the first among your colleagues to have this one-of-a-kind tribute to the NFL's Team of the Future(tm). Remember, Santa Danny is making it available to you for a limited time only at the unheard of price of only $129.99 (plus $15 for the base and $10 shipping & handling)

An incredible bargain? You bet. But you can take advantage of me because Crazy...damn....Santa Danny is innnnssaaaannee!

(By the way, you can bet that car of yours is getting towed to Delaware the next time I see it in the FedUp parking lot. Extend the Green lot indeed.)

Posted by: Anonymous | December 15, 2006 4:21 PM | Report abuse

Dude, it said GUEST COLUMN at the very top. Jason didn't write this.

genius

Posted by: Huh? | December 15, 2006 4:23 PM | Report abuse

Vote Quimby!

Posted by: CrazyDanny'sEmporium | December 15, 2006 4:26 PM | Report abuse

I just read the article in the Baltimore sun where Danny's hatchet man, Karl Swanson, said that any skins' fans who root for the Ravens now were never skins fans to begin with............you arrogant ###hole, that's one of the reasons this franchise is rapidly sinking into oblivion, you continually take the fans for granted, you think you can continue to feed us s##t sandwiches year in and year out, keep fooling us with smoke and mirrors, stupid offseason spending sprees and we'll keep coming back to the trough, year in and year out? SCREW YOU SWANSON, and Snyder as well...I rooted for this team since 1970, but this year was enough, I've gone over to the Ravens, to an organization that now reminds me of what the Redskins used to be, not the freakshow that Snyder has dumped on us now......keep thinking that way, and in a few years, when you look out at a half empty stadium, maybe then you'll realize that we the fans are the reason you jackasses have a job....

Posted by: rob oliver | December 15, 2006 4:29 PM | Report abuse

re Extremeskins:
never been there, never will. If Danny's got his demon hand in it, I'll pass.

I'm also done with the team website...it's like a virtual Fed Ex with those gdamn pop-ups. I've seen better sports photography in high school yearbooks AND no, I don't need a redskins rabbit foot keychain, redskins pez, redskins hair gel.

#81, you hit the nail on the head. I dream of telling the boss to pound salt for one glorious day in Feb and wigging out in the chocolate city.

BUT let's face it Danny would probably charge admission, confetti fees, parade route club seats, etc

Posted by: Jeff Hayes | December 15, 2006 4:40 PM | Report abuse

I love all the ES hate. You're right, there is absolutely nothing of value on the entire message board and every single member has an IQ

Everyone hates, but everyone reads it.....can't seem to figure that one out. http://extremeskins.org/atDallas06/pregame003.jpg

Posted by: Raub | December 15, 2006 4:42 PM | Report abuse

Is that a pic of J LaC looking at Extremeskins?

Posted by: OC Skins | December 15, 2006 5:04 PM | Report abuse

Right on, "rob oliver." I've been a diehard since 1983. Averaged 3-4 trips to FedEx since it opened. Paid the outrageous parking, ticket, and hot dog prices and for what? So I can watch the non-so jumbo-tron shove Papa Jon's Pizza ads down my throat WHEN YOU SHOULD BE PLAYING HIGHLIGHTS OF THE GLORY YEARS TO KEEP THE FAN PUMPED! (Sorry about the digression, but this has been such a pet peeve of mine.)

My real issues? Gutting core Redskins and living through years of fu#@ing screen passes and dump offs, while allowing the Redskins organization the privilege of sticking to me for $8 hotdogs! I've grown sooooo tired of being a Redskins fan. Sure true fans stick through the tough times, through the losses, but you can only go so far with all of the other BS without feeling abused or even taken advantage of.

I hope Dan Syner takes is arrogance with him to the grave. And as far as Saint Joe goes, I'd say I've lost some respect for him as well. So full of "gosh, oh gee" excuses about why the very Redskins WE ALL helped create is plummeting to the biggest laughing stock in sports history is damning to say the least.

Yes, I'm pissed - and I've been pissed since the BS with LaVar. I can't sum the amount of times I've drafted a letter of resignation to a one Mr. Daniel Synder. Oh, and Larry? If you're reading: I AM DONE WITH REDSKINS.COM - and I now, rest assured, I will never buy a Lexus now just to spite the proliferation of these ads. When I think of a Lexus, I conjure feelings of defeat, despair, and frustration.

Posted by: San Diego | December 15, 2006 5:29 PM | Report abuse

"Is that a pic of J LaC looking at Extremeskins?"

That would be a big affirmative.

There are far bigger problems with the Skins than Danny's urge to be King of All Media.

Posted by: Raub | December 15, 2006 6:05 PM | Report abuse

Amen to the firing of Larry Michael. I am so tired of this egomaniac having to be part of all redskin web site and broadcast shows. Except for Riggo's show, he imposes himself in his glory on every show.

The triple xxx is not that bad with Jacoby and Sheean providing the best postgame since Beatrice. The signals suck but maybe danny claus will sure up the signal with WGMS purchase.

Is there anyway to sync up the radio/internet with the tv broadcast, it seemed to work one game this season.

Final question, how deep is the redskin fan base. Snyder has got to see ticket sales dwindling on the club levels as well as Exec level, is there an endless supply of skins fans and corporations to fill the misplaced stadium forever.

Posted by: Robert A Bowie | December 15, 2006 9:45 PM | Report abuse

Extremeskins turds and trolls go back to Dan's Kool-Aid play-land....send your links to Boofer and friends.

Posted by: Turf Enforcer | December 15, 2006 10:42 PM | Report abuse

Can Gibbs bust be pulled from Canton.
I reccomend a NFL Hall of Shame located in Landover, MD. The first three busts: Snyder, Gibbs and Cerrato.

Posted by: Steve B | December 16, 2006 12:41 AM | Report abuse

Well because you're apparently the Turf Enforcer....


No.

Posted by: Raub | December 16, 2006 8:34 AM | Report abuse

rob oliver,

Anyone who has 'gone over to the Ravens' was never a true Redskins fan. Nothing could ever make me become a Ravens fan. So I guess when the Ravens suck again you'll go over to another team.

Posted by: Rusty | December 16, 2006 10:27 AM | Report abuse

Extremeskins moderators are all Danny's hatchet men. If you say something negative about the team or anything else -- they jump all over you. Its a joke.

Andyman is non other than Vinny C. --- the most worthless front office guy in NFL history. But that all worship him over there.

Its a joke -- Which is what this once proud franchise has become.

Posted by: DB | December 16, 2006 9:38 PM | Report abuse

Thank you Rusty, for making that statement"gone over to the Ravens' was never a true Redskins fan." If you are now rooting for the Ravens now then you were never a REAL Redskins fans. People are trying to blame D. Snyder for them changing alliances but it was Jack Kent Cooke who built that white elephant out in Maryland. If some of you so called Redskins fans wouldn't sell your tickets to visiting fans and stand behind your team no matter what is happening then maybe the fan experience would be a whole lot better, so on that note go ahead ride up I-95 and try to find parking at Ravens Stadium and put on your purple and black. Don't come back when Brian Billick luck runs out.

Posted by: Don Redskin | December 18, 2006 9:42 AM | Report abuse

Hey DB

Where do you get that the ES mods are Dan's "hatchet" men?

Look at the front page, the place is incredibly critical of Snyder. Screen names like "SNYDERMUSTGO" are more of the norm. If anything, the place has become angrier at Dan since the merger, and ES was around long before the Redskins took it over and has always had the same mods

Educate yourself my man

Posted by: Ish | December 20, 2006 8:06 AM | Report abuse

to Rusty and Don Redskin
guys like you are the exact reason why the skins under Snyder will remain a joke, he has you in his backpocket(actually he has his hand in your backpocket,but that's another tale. I spent the better part of nearly 40 years rooting for this team, and if Snyder goes away, I may come back. But until then I refuse to be constantly fed his bulls##t huckstering for every buck he can get out of the Redskin faithful to line his pockets, and continually put a substandard product out with that money...you want to blindly keep following the lil Pied Piper right off a cliff, you go ahead, I"m done with it....and there are a lot more like me coming boys, wait and see...growing up I followed the Colts and the Redskins, I grew up in Maryland, and when Irsay stole the colts away in the night, I threw my total allegiance to the skins, my home team...but the Ravens are Baltimores now, and at least they exhibit the class and stability the Redskins use to have...I could care less about the stadium, I live in WV now, and wouldn't give a dime to the lil Napoleon if I lived next door to FED-Ex...so you boys just keep letting yourself be led like lambs to the slaughter, and each off season, you can crow how the champions of March have finally turned the corner....take off the burgundy and gold colored glasses and take a real look at the franchise, you'll see the truth of it

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