Oh, How the Pageantry Continues

The latest salvo in the culture wars began last month when, late into the live broadcast, Hilton (a pageant judge) asked Prejean her view on same-sex unions. The blond beauty, 21, answered that she believed marriage should be between men and women -- her now-classic phrase "opposite marriage" -- and suddenly, the exchange lit up every talk show.

State officials now claim Prejean is in breach of contract for failure to disclose the typical I-was-young-and-stupid topless photos that surfaced after the pageant, and mostly for joining the conservative National Organization for Marriage's lobbying efforts. "Up until now, we have just been riding along, pretty much a passenger on this runaway train," co-director Keith Lewis told reporters. "As of today, that ends." Sadly, he didn't mention Prejean's breast implants paid for by the pageant.

But Lewis can't take away her title. That decision falls to Trump, who's reviewing all the arguments and will announce his decision at a news conference today in New York. It may not help Prejean or the pageant's sagging ratings, but should be a good show: Remember, it was just 2 1/2 years ago when Trump benevolently allowed repentant Miss USA Tara Conner to keep her job after boozing it up and a stint in rehab.

In case you're wondering: Miss North Carolina USA, Kristen Dalton, was actually crowned Miss USA that night.

Who? Exactly.