GOP 2012: A Riveting Reality Show Takes Shape

From left, John Ensign, Haley Barbour and Mark Sanford
Jon and Kate who? When Mark Sanford delivered his transfixing, game-changing confession on live TV -- awash in tears and TMI -- we were reminded that the oldest (and best!) reality show is already beginning a riveting new season. A vivid new cast of characters will vie for our hearts and votes over the next 36 months. Tune in now: The eliminations are already starting!
Haley Barbour: "The Pro." A smooth-as-silk political genius -- but can he escape his lobbyist past?
Jeb Bush: "The Legacy." A dynasty's hopes rest on his shoulders -- can he fulfill the promise again?
Charlie Crist: "The Metrosexual." Progressive moderate with a really good tan -- but is he too slick?
John Ensign: "The Gambler." Oops -- caught cheating.
Newt Gingrich: "The Veteran." Semi-retired from politics, happily married at last -- but the old dog still has plenty of new tricks.
Mike Huckabee: "The Jester." Quick with a joke and Bible verse -- but would he rather entertain than lead?
Jon Huntsman: "The Crossover." Headed to China as Obama's ambassador -- but will the GOP welcome him back?
Bobby Jindal: "The Kid." The Cajun-flavored overachiever -- too much, too soon?
Sarah Palin: "The Hockey Mom." Feisty lady with a soap-opera family gives the boys a run for their money.
Tim Pawlenty: "The Geek." Minnesota earnest with a dash of bland -- is he flying too far under the radar?
Mitt Romney: "The Square." The handsome rich guy with the perfect résumé -- or is it too perfect?
Mark Sanford: "The Adventurer." Strayed too far off the trail.
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The Reliable Source
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June 26, 2009; 1:03 AM ET
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Posted by: MBD2 | June 26, 2009 10:06 AM | Report abuse
If this is the best of the Repubs and the Dems don't win shame on them.
Posted by: rlj1 | June 26, 2009 11:11 AM | Report abuse
My guess is the actual 2012 nominee isn't on this list. Just like most people didn't even know who Obama was in 2005, much less would have guessed him to be the '08 nominee.
Posted by: RambleOn | June 26, 2009 1:19 PM | Report abuse
How fast we forget. Newt doesn't have a line through him yet he has cheated on two wives and dated a staffer. Short memories mean that Ensign and Stanford may be back.
Posted by: SherryJeanne1 | June 27, 2009 11:58 AM | Report abuse
Why isnt Michael Steele's name listed as a possibility. This liberal newspaper is also a liberal racist newspaper. Sure, Steele has limited experience, but if I remember correctly, doesnt our current President? He appears to be doing fine, but the Post wants you (blacks) to think they are for all the people, but yet they dont even bother to mention Steele as someone viable. Even though he is the Chair of the GOP. Guarantee you they would have mentioned and have mentioned DNC Chairmans as possible candidates before.
Posted by: Fred23 | June 28, 2009 8:04 AM | Report abuse
"Newt Gingrich: the old dog still has plenty of new tricks."
Yeah, but also the recurrence of an old problem. At one point, years ago, he was properly Housebroken.
But like so many others these days, he's "put that behind him now" and has "moved on".
Yep, that's the Newt I knew: "It's my movement, and nobody but me will ever control it."
Posted by: laboo | June 28, 2009 11:36 AM | Report abuse
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Sorry girls but this list is a FAIL, nice try though!