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Meanwhile... (Holiday "Cheer" Redux....)

Leave it to old-school Rep. John Dingell (D-Mich.), the Dean of the House, to use his Season's "greeting" email to slam his Republican colleagues. Here's the text of Dingell's holiday poem, titled "The Grinches that Stole Christmas":


Every Democrat (and many Republicans) in Congress liked Christmas a lot.

But some Grinches who lived just north of Congress, Did NOT!

The Grinches hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season!

Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.

It could be their perspectives weren't quite right.

It could be, perhaps, that their budgets were just too tight.

But I think that the most likely reason of all,

May have been they were still having a hard time accepting their fall...

Whatever the reason, their perspective or their fall,

They stood there near Christmas, hating the Congressional halls,

Some at undisclosed locations with frowns and sneers,

They reflected on all the Democrats accomplished this year,

A new direction was made, and much was completed

They knew this was true, and their brows became heated

"We must stop their progress," they grumbled and mumbled

"We'll veto and veto and hope the Dems stumble.

"We'll tell them S-CHIP was bad, a political fumble"

"Well we'll see who laughs last when the Democrats crumble"

"They're counting their votes," they said with a sneer

"Energy independence will pass before recess gets here."

So off they rode south, speeding down Pennsylvania Ave

Saying, "I will take from the poor and give to those that have"

"Drive faster", they screamed at their non-union drivers

"The House passes bills as consistent as a geyser"

But then a phone rang, with an audible tweeter

It was none other than the Senate Minority Leader

"Sir I have plan to stop the Christmas cheer"

"One that is dastardly, mean and quite insincere."

"Do tell!" said the listener, his ears all atwitter

"We need a good plan, the pick of the litter."

"We have no agenda, the Party's a mess

"Our presidential frontrunner too often wears a dress

"Tax cuts for the rich failed, so too has fear, war and bigotry

"So what I propose are filibusters and stopping conference committees"

"So simple, so sure, so plain to see"

"When we have nothing to offer: obstruct the majority"

"Dems have an agenda, a plan for the holiday season"

"We have nothing, not at all, no rhyme or no reason"

And then grins spread from ear to ear

And laughs were let out for all to hear,

"Yes that's what we'll do, we'll complain and obstruct -- it is all we can offer

"Elections have consequences, but our hearts are not softer."

So on Coburn, DeMint, and on McConnell too

Obstruct if you must, but the American people will blame you know who

Change is in the air, a new direction is steered

Minimum wage, SCHIP, stem cells and ethics...all that you feared

All passed by the Congress, with the people's support

"Bah humbug" is all that the grinches could retort

But America knows who helped them this year,

Who fought for working families, those far and those near

Who raised the minimum wage, presented a plan for Iraq

Who helped all Americans get off the mat

Who continue to help to spread Christmas Cheer

It certainly wasn't those with grumbling sneers

In three short weeks, we begin once again,

And all can be merry and all can be friends,

Legislation can pass for all to help write,

Going to conference committee is proper, and need not be a fight

We all can make laws as the framers intended,

We mustn't resort to rules being suspended

All the majority asks for is good faith, on both sides of aisle

To settle our differences together, with a handshake and a smile

The American people wanted change, and that's what we have provided

Because when this Congress works, we can all be delighted

In this season of Christmas and holiday fun

Let's work together - politics will be there when our work is done

For now let us work on the people's agenda

The Congress will always be here, but come next Novemba'

We'll have a new President, the people's new choice

Then we can say "adios!" to these divisive cowboys.

By Mary Ann Akers  |  December 14, 2007; 4:20 PM ET
 
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Comments

Can somebody teach this guy to write lines that SCAN? Jeez. It's not as if Dr. Seuss is hard to parody...the guy wrote his books using a verse template! Whatever his other virtues, Dingell showed that he has zero understanding of how to write verse. For someone like that to give a poem to the press is like a tone-deaf singer putting on a concert at the Met.
The next obvious question is: why publish something so badly executed?

Posted by: Jack Marshall | December 15, 2007 12:38 AM | Report abuse

Dingell, should spend more time at what we pay him to do, If he produces results at all; I sure hope they are better than his verse.

Posted by: kandjc@comcast.net | December 15, 2007 10:15 PM | Report abuse

It is truly shameful that congressional democrats are putting more energy into writing bad poems than accomplishing anything of substance

Posted by: Anonymous | December 17, 2007 9:32 AM | Report abuse

The Hollywood writers were hard up for work & probably wrote this out while on the picket line.

Not all that clever, but not untrue either.

Dingell should have blasted Schumer & Lieberman for their obstructionist actions on the AMT "fix" and Iraq war benchmarks, respectively.

It's still better than the Singing Senators (aka, the gay & metrosexual Republican men's chorus), & probably less of a time "waste".

Posted by: Ray | December 18, 2007 2:50 PM | Report abuse

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Posted by: votenic | December 19, 2007 3:46 PM | Report abuse

Why leave it to Dingell when the Sleuth can slam his Republican colleagues? Having scanned down to this post (ten in all), there's nary a one that discusses the troubles and travails of a Democrat. Well, except for Lieberman, who I'm sure many don't consider a Democrat.

Shocking--at least we have a pure, ethically unchallenged party in power in Congress. Must be the first time in history.

Posted by: Anonymous | January 2, 2008 7:19 PM | Report abuse

the more time they spend writing poems and the less time legislating the better

congress should be cancelled, is there any way to have an intern strike?

Posted by: Anonymous | January 4, 2008 6:45 PM | Report abuse

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