Drinks on E!
When TV critics sat down for the E! session at Winter TV Press Tour 2007, each received a copy of trade paper Variety. Splashed across pages 2 and 3 was an enormous E! ad:
2006: Our Most Watched Year Ever
Drinks are on us at Hyde Tonight.
Hyde is maybe the hottest club in Los Angeles, on the Sunset Strip in West Hollywood. You will never see the inside of Hyde -- it's very small and terribly exclusive. Maybe you've seen snaps of Britney Spears or Nicole Richie being carried out of Hyde. Which is why E! chose that location for giving out free drinks to exactly the people who don't need E!'s charity. Or their liquor.
Anyway, in small print at the bottom of the ad is an odd disclaimer:
"We wanted to give you alcoholic drinks, but the laws of California prohibit it. We can only offer a non-alcoholic drink (i.e. Shirley Temples)."
People don't go to Hyde to drink Shirley Temples. They go to Hyde to get fractured. Imagine Lindsay Lohan ordering a Shirley Temple or Paris Hilton asking for a Virgin Mary.
The disclaimer also said the offer applies only to the first 50 non-alcoholic drinks ordered and that the offer is good for only one day. The odds of 50 people ordering a non-alcoholic beverage in Hyde in one day are slim to none.
An E! rep at the press tour told us that they discovered only the afternoon of the day the ad went to print that it's legal for E! to offer free booze to people on a guest list at Hyde but illegal to offer free booze to so-called Paris-ites.
Comic Sarah Silverman deals harshly with TV critics who point out big plot holes in her new Comedy Central series.
In the pilot episode of "The Sarah Silverman Program," Silverman goes on a Seinfeldian journey to obtain batteries for her TV remote control, without having any actual money.
One critic noted that earlier in the episode, she had plastered loads of dollar bills on her television screen to cover the screen.
"Shut the [expletive] up!" she screamed.
Also in the episode, Silverman claims to have stubbed her vagina. One critic asked how that is done. Journalists have to ask these tough questions.
"It's easier than you would think," she shot back. "Opening letters. Get a letter-opener is all I can say. It's worth it."
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