The Miracle of Sundance Head
The Miracle of Sundance Head Day on "American Idol," aka Sure You're Talented But He's the Son of 60's Rock 'n Roll Icon Roy Head So He's In And You're Out Day.
Remaining "Idol" wannabe's were transferred from downtown Los Angeles to the Pasadena Civic Auditorium where once again we watched them on the Elevator Cam as they rode up one floor to judges Paula Abdul, Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson to find out whether they made it through to the real competition.
By the end of the broadcast, judges chose their 12 guys and 12 chicks.
This year, judges perfected their bad-news-delivery-of-good-news technique.
"You weren't one of the better singers. Unfortunately you're -- going to be seeing a lot of us!
"We have decided not -- to exclude you!"
Or, our personal fave:
"You haven't - failed!"
By now we all know Lakisha Jones has the best voice -- no competition -- and has that all important touchy feely back story so important to American Idol producers -- single mom, adorable little daughter, dreary bank job.
They could save everyone a lot of time here and just give Lakisha the crown and the recording contract. Simon said as much on the show, when he told her "You know, you're a great singer -- that's why you're through" as she shook hands with the judges and thanked them.
But Fox has to fill its primetime schedule with something through the end of the 2006-07 TV season in May and, sadly, "Standoff" is not that show, ditto "Justice," "Vanished," "'Til Death," "Happy Hour," or any other new series to which Fox subjected us in the fall.
Meanwhile, Fox's other spring sure thing, "24," is running kinda lame this year and Fox may have to scrub it of those important torture scenes that do so much to bring in viewers, if Department of Homeland Security deems them too dangerous for West Point grads to continue watching.
So Lakisha's win will be drawn out over the next several months.
Either that or she'll get whacked by viewers, sign a recording contract anyway, maybe land a role in a movie that becomes a hit, get nominated for an Academy Award and do a slew of interviews to promote the flick in which she talks about how she suffered "Idol" abuse. Whatever.
There were virtually no surprises in the judges' choices. All known backup singers made it through. Ditto Jack Osbourne look alike Chris Sligh. Paul Kim swore if he made it through to the semi-finals he would never wear shoes again, but would always wear the same pair of underwear. He got through too.
Several chicks made it through even though in the clips we see from the Hollywood rounds -- presumably the best the producers could find -- they were terrible. But, of course, they're hot. Like Alaina Alexander, who sounded like a beagle puppy when you're trying to take a thorn out of its paw.
Finally, there was just one "guy" slot left and two guys: Jason "Sundance" Head, son of Roy Head, and Tommy Daniels.
Tommy had been very relaxed in the waiting room, letting one of the pretty chicks play with his curly hair. On the elevator ride with Jason, he cut up -- he knew Jason had messed up badly during Hollywood tryouts, not only screaching off key but forgetting words to songs.
But, of course, Jason is the son of Roy Head.
So the judges told Tommy they liked him since the first day they met him, and they told Jason they liked him a lot during auditions on the road but that he was very weak in the Hollywood rounds -- and then they gave Jason the last remaining slot.
Tommy gave the Elevator Cam the finger, with both hands, on the ride back to the waiting room. Jason consoled Tommy, telling him that if he becomes a star he will hire Tommy to be his bodyguard because he's such a big guy.
Lisa de Moraes
February 15, 2007; 8:16 AM ET
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